ANALYZE THIS
Screenplay by
PETER TOLAN and HAROLD RAMIS and KENNETH LONERGAN
Story by
KENNETH LONERGAN and PETER TOLAN
July 1998 Draft
FOR EDUCATIONAL
PURPOSES ONLY
1 CREDITS BEGIN OVER BLACK. 1
DOMINIC MANETTA
a man in his 70s, narrates nostalgically OVER a MONTAGE
of related news photos.
MANETTA (V.O.)
1957 was a big year. The Russians
put that Sputnik into outer space,
the Dodgers played their last game
at Ebbets Field, 'that guy' shot
Frank Costello in the head, and
missed, and the Gallo brothers
whacked Albert Anastasia in that
barber shop in the Park Sheraton
Hotel. It was total chaos. With
Anastasia gone, Vito Genovese
figures he's king shit, but Carlo
Gambino and 'Joe Bananas' both
want to be boss of all bosses. So
they call a meeting -- a big
meeting.
2 EXT. UPSTATE NEW YORK - DAY 2
CREDITS CONTINUE. In FADED 16mm documentary-style, we
see a country road winding through rolling hills. At the
top of the hill, a black '57 Cadillac appears and sweeps
through the peaceful landscape.
MANETTA (V.O.)
It was the first time the whole
commission was ever gonna meet
face to face. Bosses and wiseguys
were comin' in from all over the
country, and all the New York
families, too -- maybe sixty
bosses, the whole wiseguy world --
all headin' toward this little
town upstate to figure out what's
what.
3 EXT. ROADSIDE - DAY 3
A sign reads, "Entering Apalachin - pop. 342." The black
Cadillac speeds past the sign, then another black Caddy,
then a black Lincoln, then another Caddy, a Lincoln, etc.
MANETTA (V.O.)
Your father and me, we were goin'
up with Tommy D., Fat Tommy.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
2.
3 CONTINUED: 3
MANETTA (V.O.CONT'D)
He was running the family at the
time. Anyway, I don't know what
anybody was thinking, but some
asshole thought it would be a good
idea to have this meeting at Joe
Babara's farm in the country where
nobody would notice.
4 EXT. RURAL GAS STATION - DAY 4
A local state police deputy is gassing up his motorcycle
when the parade of shiny black cars rolls by. He looks
up and scratches his head at the unusual sight.
MANETTA (V.O.)
Turns out the local cops were
watching Joe Babara like a hawk.
So now you got about fifty Caddies
and Lincolns pullin' into Apalachin
and some deputy sheriff with cow
shit on his shoes notices all the
traffic and calls the Feds.
5 EXT. JOE BABARA'S ESTATE - DAY 5
The Caddies and Lincolns are all parked around a rambling
country manor. Bosses and wiseguys are meeting and
greeting each other on the big front porch.
One WISEGUY is trying to shoo a cow away from his car.
WISEGUY
You wanna be a ribeye? Get away
from the fuckin' car.
6 EXT. WOODS - SAME TIME 6
Federal agents start moving in quietly, heavily-armed,
wearing big FBI arm bands.
MANETTA (V.O.)
The meeting never even got
started. The Feds moved in --
7 EXT. HOUSE - DAY 7
Agents with weapons drawn charge the house and start
breaking down the front door.
3.
8 EXT. BACK OF HOUSE - SAME TIME 8
MANETTA (V.O.)
-- and we moved out.
Gangsters in shiny suits are squeezing through windows
and leaping off balconies.
WIDE - WISEGUYS
fleeing into the surrounding woods and fields.
MANETTA (V.O.)
Your papa and me hid in a field
with hay or corn, some kinda
foliage, I don't know.
9 EXT. FARM FIELD - DAY 9
Two wiseguys in suits crouch in the tall grass.
Suddenly they see a John Deere harvester bearing down on
them.
MANETTA (V.O.)
Then along comes this farmer who
almost runs us over in a tractor,
so your father hauls out his piece,
this .44 cannon he used to carry,
and hijacks the goddamn tractor.
Funniest fuckin' thing I ever saw.
10 EXT. COUNTRY ROAD - DAY 10
The farmer goes flying off the harvester and the two
wiseguys drive off on it.
The farmer looks up to see the John Deere disappear in a
swirling cloud of dust that FILLS the SCREEN.
END CREDITS.
DISSOLVE TO:
11 SWIRLING CLOUD OF CREAM 11
on top of an espresso. PULL BACK as a hand reaches in
and runs a lemon rind along the rim of the cup. The
espresso is picked up and sipped by MANETTA, the aging
boss of a prominent New York crime family.
(CONTINUED)
4.
11 CONTINUED: 11
INT. RITZ CLAM BOX - LATE AFTERNOON (PRESENT)
The place is nearly empty. Manetta is talking to PAUL
VITTI, a dark, intense, intelligent man in his late
forties, and a powerful boss in his own right.
MANETTA
Anyway, Carlo Gambino came out of
it capo de tutti capi, and that
was the last time the whole
commission tried to meet -- until
now.
VITTI
(brooding)
I don't know. I don't like it.
What do we need a meeting for?
Let everybody worry about their
own business.
They finish eating.
MANETTA
The '57 meeting was about how we
were going to divide up the whole
country. This meeting is about
how we're gonna survive. You got
'made' guys informing for the
Feds; bosses going to jail;
everybody's dealing drugs; people
are getting whacked without
permission. And on top of
everything, now we got the Chinese
Triads and these crazy Russians to
deal with. Everything's changing.
We need a leader. Someone with
fresh ideas. Someone like you.
It's gonna be a new century, Paul.
We gotta change with the times.
VITTI
What are we gonna get, a fuckin'
web site?
MANETTA
You remember what else happened in
1957, Paul?
VITTI
Yeah, I remember.
MANETTA
When your father died, I promised
him I'd always look out for you.
Come to the meeting.
(CONTINUED)
5.
11 CONTINUED: (2) 11
They get up to leave. Vitti drops some money on the
table. Bodyguards follow them to the door. The waiters
and the owner bow to them as they pass. They are almost
out the door when Vitti hesitates.
VITTI
Wait a second. I'm just gonna
grab a toothpick.
The instant he steps back inside, Manetta and his
bodyguard are struck by an incredible VOLLEY of GUNFIRE,
which BLOWS OUT all the GLASS in the DOOR and WINDOWS.
Vitti's bodyguard, JELLY, grabs him and throws him behind
the counter, shielding him with his body.
Outside, the shooting has stopped and curious bystanders
are looking in the broken windows. Vitti's eyes well up
with tears.
CUT TO:
12 KLEENEX 12
being pulled out of a box. CAROLINE, a woman in her
early thirties, dabs at her eyes with the tissue. She's
sitting on the couch in --
INT. BEN'S OFFICE - SAME TIME
The office is warm, comfortable, and nicely decorated.
CAROLINE
(weepy)
I kept telling him that I needed
room to grow and find myself as a
person. Not just as a woman but
as an independent entity.
BEN SOBOL
her therapist, seems to be listening intently.
CAROLINE
I told him I needed to get in
touch with my uniqueness, but he
couldn't handle that. He said I
was driving him away. Do you
think I was driving him away, Dr.
Sobol?
Ben leans forward sympathetically.
(CONTINUED)
6.
12 CONTINUED: 12
He's in his mid-forties, has an expressive face and a
quick wit, and despite the occasional lapse, he is a
gifted and caring psychologist.
BEN
Things end, Caroline. That's just
a part of life. It's how we deal
with things ending that's important.
CAROLINE
I just can't believe it's over between
me and Steve. Maybe there's still
hope.
BEN
Well, he did take out a restraining
order against you. I have to be
honest, that's usually not a good
sign.
CAROLINE
But what should I do?
BEN
Well, Caroline, I think the first
thing you have to do...
(voice rising)
... is stop whining about this
pathetic loser! You're a tragedy
queen!
(mocking)
'Steve doesn't respect me. Steve
doesn't love me anymore.' Who gives
a shit! Get a fucking life! You
are, without a doubt, the most
boring human being I have ever met!
Please, say something interesting
before I lapse into a goddamn coma!
Caroline looks curiously at Ben, unperturbed.
CAROLINE
Dr. Sobol?
BEN
Lost in his fantasy, not really listening. He comes
to attention and tries to cover.
(CONTINUED)
7.
12 CONTINUED: (2) 12
BEN
Yes. Yes. I was just reflecting
on your whole -- situation. It's
very interesting what you were
just saying. I want you to think
about it, and I'm going to think
about it, so we'll both think
about it and we'll continue next
week when I get back from my
vacation.
Caroline bursts into tears again.
BEN
Or not.
CUT TO:
13 INT. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY - DAY 13
Ben rushes upstairs and into his bedroom. His 14-year-old
son MICHAEL is in his room putting on a tuxedo.
MICHAEL
You're late.
BEN
(changing hurriedly)
I know. I couldn't get rid of my
last patient. I think she was a
tick in a past life.
MICHAEL
Yeah, what's Caroline's problem?
Your boyfriend's gone, he hates
your guts, get over it.
BEN
Michael! What did I tell you?
You can't listen to my sessions!
It's private stuff.
MICHAEL
I can't help it. I hear you
through the vent in my room.
BEN
Funny how that happens when you
lie on the floor and put your ear
up against it.
(CONTINUED)
8.
13 CONTINUED: 13
MICHAEL
Okay, okay. How's that guy who
dreams about shitting trout?
BEN
(entering, putting
on his tux shirt)
Fine. He moved up to striped
bass. Put on your cummerbund.
Boy, have you grown. Did your
mother move next door to a
nuclear power plant?
MICHAEL
(struggling with the
cummerbund)
Why do we have to wear rented
clothes to Grandpa's party? This
blows.
BEN
(helping him)
We have to dress up because
Grandpa can't have a good time
unless everyone else is extremely
uncomfortable.
(looks at Michael
and makes a quick
decision)
Forget the tux. Regular clothes.
Ben exits, pulling off the tux shirt.
MICHAEL
(taking off his
tux shirt)
Are you ambivalent about Grandpa
Isaac?
BEN (O.S.)
(from his room)
Ambivalent? Where do you get that stuff?
MICHAEL
Mom.
BEN
(annoyed)
She's not supposed to do that, you
know.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
9.
13 CONTINUED: (2) 13
BEN (CONT'D)
Your mother and I, when we
got divorced, we agreed we wouldn't
put you in the middle, or use you
as a go-between to talk about each
other. So just do me a favor and
tell your mother to shut her big
mouth.
(comes back into
Michael's room)
Did she say anything about me
getting married again? I think
she could be feeling a little anger
about it.
MICHAEL
Oh, yeah. She really cares. She
says you're intimidated by women
your own age, and that's why you
go for these young babes.
BEN
(fuming)
Okay. Listen, for two seconds,
pretend I'm not your father.
I'm just some guy, okay?
MICHAEL
You gonna vent?
BEN
Yeah.
(venting)
I hate her! I really hate her!
(a beat, then
brightly)
Okay. Dad again. Let's go.
CUT TO:
14 EXT. WAREHOUSE - SAME TIME 14
Paul Vitti gets out of his car and walks to the warehouse
with his most trusted soldier, Jelly, a hulking bruiser,
and his sidekick JIMMY, a tightly-wound ferret with chips
on both shoulders.
VITTI
So what did you find out?
(CONTINUED)
10.
14 CONTINUED: 14
JELLY
(as they walk)
The word is Primo Sindone must have
ordered it, but, uh --
He hesitates.
VITTI
What?
Jelly looks at Jimmy.
VITTI
What?
JELLY
(reluctantly)
A lot of people think you set him
up.
VITTI
Why the fuck would I want to kill
Dominic? He was like a father to
me.
JELLY
So you could be the big boss.
Everybody figures you're lookin'
to wipe out the competition before
the big meeting.
VITTI
Oh, is that what they figure?
JELLY
It's alright with me if you did --
VITTI
I didn't kill him! I told you
that! Don't you hear?
CUT TO:
14A INT. WAREHOUSE - CONTINUOUS ACTION 14A
They enter a room where other Vitti family soldiers,
EDDIE COKES, TUNA, and JOHNNY BIGS are waiting. In the
middle of the room, a young rat named NICKY SHIVERS is
tied to a chair under a strong overhead light. When he
speaks, we get a hint of mental incompetence.
(CONTINUED)
11.
14A CONTINUED: 14A
NICKY
Please, Mr. Vitti, I told 'em I
don't know anything but they don't
believe me 'cause that one time I
said Little Joe hit Dukey and it
turned out he didn't but I didn't
know because --
JIMMY
(smacks him)
Shut the fuck up!
Nicky goes suddenly quiet. He watches in terror as Jimmy
steps aside and Vitti moves close holding a short length
of lead pipe.
VITTI
Nicky, you know me, right?
NICKY
Yeah. You're Mr. Vitti.
VITTI
And you know what I'm gonna do to
you if you lie to me, right?
NICKY
Uh, you're gonna crack me on the
head with that pipe?
JIMMY
(slaps him)
It's a rhetorical question, you
fuckin' idiot.
VITTI
I'm only gonna ask you this one
time. Who killed Dominic Manetta?
NICKY
I don't know.
VITTI
(roars)
Don't fuckin' lie to me!
NICKY
(in tears)
Honest to God, I don't know!
VITTI
You little rat bastard...
(CONTINUED)
12.
14A CONTINUED: (2) 14A
Vitti winds up to brain him with the pipe. They all
wince in anticipation of the blow. But Vitti just
freezes there with his arm upraised. Then he drops his
arm and seems to sag.
VITTI
Forget about it. He doesn't know
anything.
He tosses the pipe aside.
VITTI
Get him outta here.
Jimmy looks at Jelly in surprise.
15 INT. MINIVAN - LATER 15
Ben is driving to the party with Michael. Sitting in
stopped traffic, he checks his mirrors anxiously.
BEN
(to himself,
urgently)
Look at this. Everybody's nuts.
Ooh, I hate walking into that
house late.
MICHAEL
I think you're reacting like this
because you're mad we have to
go to this party.
BEN
No. Don't. I'm not going to be
analyzed by someone who up until
a few years ago believed in
Santa. Sorry, but we only have
room for one Dr. Sobol in this
family.
MICHAEL
But there's two Dr. Sobols.
There's you and Grandpa.
BEN
(a beat)
Can we talk about something else?
MICHAEL
Are you going to read Grandpa's
new book? Mom says you won't
because you're...
(CONTINUED)
13.
15 CONTINUED: 15
BEN
Does your mother talk about
anything else or is it just me
twenty-four hours a day?
Wham! Ben REAR-ENDS the CAR in front of them.
BEN
That's your mother's fault! Your
mother did that! Damn!
CUT TO:
16 EXT. EAST 90TH STREET - NIGHT 16
The minivan has rear-ended a black Lincoln Town Car. The
trunk has sprung open and Nicky Shivers can be seen in
the trunk, bound and gagged, kicking and squirming.
Muffled shouts can be heard through the duct tape over
his mouth.
Jelly and Jimmy jump out of the Lincoln and slam the top
of the trunk just as Ben gets out of the minivan to
inspect the damage.
JIMMY
(heading Ben off)
What's the matter with you? Are
you some kind of moron?
BEN
I'm sorry. It's totally my fault.
Ben looks at the damage. The Lincoln has gotten the
worst of it. The rear bumper is hanging off, and Jelly
is struggling to latch the trunk.
JIMMY
Did you see anything?
BEN
I was talking to my son. I took
my eyes off the road --
JIMMY
Forget that bullshit. Did you see
anything?
Jelly steps in to defuse the situation, warning Jimmy off
with a look.
(CONTINUED)
14.
16 CONTINUED: 16
JELLY
That's all right, sir. It's our
fault for being in front of you
like that.
BEN
(surprised)
Well, I should have been watching.
Let me give you my insurance
information --
JELLY
It's okay. Forget about it.
BEN
Really? It looks like your whole
rear end might be screwed up.
Jimmy is reattaching the rear bumper and securing the
trunk lid with duct tape.
JELLY
No, it was like that before.
BEN
Maybe we should call the police?
JELLY
(suddenly menacing)
Why? Fuck the police.
BEN
Right! Fuck 'em.
HORNS start HONKING behind them.
BEN
At least take my card. You might
look at the damage in the morning
and change your mind.
Jelly takes the card and reads it.
JELLY
You're a doctor?
BEN
Ph.D. Psychologist.
JELLY
A shrink. You talk to a lotta
nuts, huh?
Ben hears KICKING from inside the car trunk.
(CONTINUED)
15.
16 CONTINUED: (2) 16
JELLY
Pings and knocks. Cheap gas.
Hey, how do those minivans handle?
JIMMY (O.S.)
Jelly! Let's go!
JELLY
Take it easy, Doc.
Ben looks totally confused as Jelly hustles back to his
car.
CUT TO:
17 INT. SOBOL HOME - LIVING ROOM - ISAAC SOBOL 17
Ben's father, at the piano in the spacious, elegant,
tastefully-decorated living room, surrounded by adoring
guests, playing and singing an exuberant rendition of
"You Must Have Been a Beautiful Baby." Isaac is a silver-
haired patrician, overloaded with self-esteem.
ISAAC
(ending the sing-
along)
All right, neurotics only! Well,
you must have been a beautiful
ba-a-by, 'cause baby look at you
now, thank God for Prozac, baby
look at you now!
BEN AND MICHAEL
standing off to the side talking to Ben's mother DOROTHY.
In the corner is a large advertising display featuring
Isaac's smiling picture on the front cover of his new
book, Tell Me What You Feel, Tell Me What You Want.
BEN
What do you mean you're not
coming? It's my wedding.
DOROTHY
We understand it's a special day
for you, Benny, but your father
and I can't just pick up and
leave town every time you decide
to get married.
(CONTINUED)
16.
17 CONTINUED: 17
BEN
Every time? This is a once-in-a-
-- twice-in-a-lifetime thing.
Isaac joins them.
BEN
Dad, you're not coming to my
wedding?
ISAAC
We want to be there, but I have
three book signings next weekend.
I can't piss off these big book
stores. If I cancel, they'll
stick me down on the bottom shelf.
That's how they are.
BEN
Yeah, that's the word on the
street. The self-help book
business is full of vindictive
pricks.
DOROTHY
(looking around)
Ben! The language.
BEN
I'm sorry, but I've been alone
for eight years, now I've finally
met someone I want to spend the
rest of my life with and I would
really like you to meet her
before we get married. You're
going to be her family. I think
it's better she knows that up
front.
ISAAC
You're really hostile tonight.
BEN
I'm joking.
DOROTHY
(jumping in)
I think I'll go talk to the mayor.
BEN
The mayor's here?
DOROTHY
I can only hope.
(CONTINUED)
17.
17 CONTINUED: (2) 17
Dorothy exits.
ISAAC
What's wrong?
BEN
Nothing. Everything's fine.
ISAAC
How's your practice?
BEN
It's great. Just great. I've got
some very interesting patients --
extremely interesting.
Fascinating actually.
MICHAEL
Dad has a patient who dreams he
shits trout.
BEN
Thanks, Mike.
ISAAC
Excuse us, Michael.
Isaac pulls Ben into the foyer.
ISAAC
Why are you wasting your time out
there in the boondocks? New York
City is the Mecca of Madness.
BEN
I'm just not sure I could spend my
life dealing with people whose
biggest crisis is how to fire the
maid.
ISAAC
It beats a guy with an ass full
of flounder.
BEN
Trout! And don't minimize my
practice.
ISAAC
Why are you getting so defensive?
This is about your own feelings
of inadequacy.
(CONTINUED)
18.
17 CONTINUED: (3) 17
BEN
You always turn it back on me.
Why do you do that?
ISAAC
Why do you think I do that?
BEN
Why do you think I think you do
that? Go ahead, now you ask me
why I think you think I think you
do that.
ISAAC
Enough. I want you to think about
what I said. And when you're ready
to talk to me like a normal person,
I'll be at the piano with
Regis Philbin.
(as he crosses away)
Rege!
REGIS PHILBIN
I'm not singing, Isaac!
ISAAC
Now, ladies and gentlemen, at the
piano, Regis Philbin!
Applause and laughter from the guests. Ben grabs a
glass of champagne from a passing waiter's tray.
BEN
(to the waiter)
Thomas Wolfe was right. You can't
go home again -- because your
parents still live there.
CUT TO:
18 INT. OLD LION SOCIAL CLUB - NIGHT 18
Vitti's men converse quietly while a soldier sweeps the
room for bugs. He gives the "all clear" and SALVATORE
MASIELLO, the old consigliere, speaks.
MASIELLO
The Manetta family is asking a lot
of questions. They think we hit
Dominic.
CARLO MANGANO, the burly underboss of the Vitti family,
jumps in.
(CONTINUED)
19.
18 CONTINUED: 18
MANGANO
Forget Dominic! They were after
Paul.
(to Vitti)
It's a miracle you survived. I
thank God.
VITTI
Yeah, thank God. All I know is if
I didn't have some veal stuck in
my teeth, I'd be laying there with
Dominic.
JOHNNY BIGS
This is all about the big meeting.
Primo Sindone wants to run the
whole show.
MANGANO
Yeah, but Primo's a boss. He
knows the rules. He couldn't go
after Dominic and Paul unless the
other families gave their
permission.
VITTI
(starting to sweat)
If they did, we're heading for one
big fuckin' war.
(having trouble
breathing)
Talk to Zello and Baldassare.
Find out what you can. We got two
weeks. If the other New York
bosses are against us, I want to
know it before I walk into that
meeting.
He feels a stabbing pain in his chest.
MANGANO
You all right, Paul? You don't
look good.
VITTI
I'm a little choked up here. I
gotta get some air.
He walks outside. Jelly follows. Mangano looks
quizzically after them.
CUT TO:
20.
19 EXT. OUTSIDE THE OLD LION - CONTINUOUS ACTION 19
Vitti is having trouble breathing.
JELLY
You feel all right?
VITTI
I feel like shit. This whole
thing is like a huge fuckin'
headache.
JELLY
(concerned)
You havin' one of those
mindgrains?
Sweating profusely now, Vitti feels another stabbing
chest pain.
VITTI
Get the car.
CUT TO:
20 INT. EMERGENCY ROOM - LATER 20
Vitti is putting on his shirt. He looks considerably
better. Jelly is sitting down, tapping his own knee with
the little rubber hammer. Nothing moves.
DOCTOR SHULMAN, a young cardiology resident, enters.
DOCTOR
Good news, Mr. Evans. Your heart
is just fine.
VITTI
How could it be fine? I've had
like eight heart attacks in the
last three weeks.
DOCTOR
Well, based on everything, I'd say
you probably had an anxiety
attack.
VITTI
(a beat)
What?
DOCTOR
An anxiety attack. A panic
attack. I can give you some Xanax
if it happens again soon --
(CONTINUED)
21.
20 CONTINUED: 20
VITTI
(menacing)
Look at me. Do I look like a guy
who panics?
DOCTOR
(nervous now)
There's nothing -- I mean -- it's
a common thing --
VITTI
Where did you go to medical
school? I had a heart attack, you
quack bastard.
DOCTOR
(very scared now)
Well, not according to these --
As Vitti moves toward the Doctor, Jelly instinctively
grabs the Doctor from behind and holds him while Vitti
wraps the blood pressure cuff around his neck.
VITTI
(low and deadly,
pumping up the
cuff with the
squeeze-ball)
Listen to me, jerk-off. I had a
mild heart attack and now it's
over. You understand?
The Doctor nods vigorously, his eyes bugging out as the
pressure around his neck increases.
VITTI
If anyone asks you, you never saw
me, and I was never here. Is that
clear?
DOCTOR
(strangled)
Yes.
VITTI
Good.
(to Jelly)
Take the chart.
Jelly releases the Doctor, grabs all the papers and
follows Vitti out the door.
CUT TO:
22.
21 EXT. HOSPITAL - MOMENTS LATER 21
Vitti and Jelly come walking out the emergency room exit.
Vitti stops.
VITTI
Jelly, I need you to do something
for me as my friend.
JELLY
Anything.
VITTI
You have to find me a doctor.
JELLY
We just came from the doctor.
VITTI
Not that kind of doctor. I need a
head doctor.
JELLY
You're gonna change your face like
Sonny Black? Don't get his nose
though, he looks like a pig.
VITTI
Not a plastic surgeon, ya spoostud.
Do I have to spell everything out?
JELLY
It saves time.
VITTI
I need you to find me a
psychiatrist.
JELLY
Wow. This is like the Psychic
Network or something. I just ran
into a psychiatrist. Actually he
ran into me.
VITTI
Is he any good?
JELLY
Yeah, he seemed like a smart guy.
He had a business card and
everything --
VITTI
He had a card? That's a real
fuckin' achievement.
(CONTINUED)
23.
21 CONTINUED: 21
JELLY
What do you need a shrink for
anyway?
VITTI
It's not for me. It's for a
friend. This friend is having
some problems, so I'm going to ask
the shrink some questions and get
some answers for my friend.
JELLY
Got it.
VITTI
And nobody can know. If anyone
hears I'm talking to a shrink, it
could be interpreted the wrong
way. You know what I mean?
JELLY
Of course. Absolutely.
(then)
Can I ask you one thing?
VITTI
What?
JELLY
This friend. Is it me?
CUT TO:
22 INT. BEN'S OFFICE - DAY 22
Ben is with a patient, CARL ANDERSON, a high-strung
milquetoast in his late forties.
BEN
Carl, I'm detecting a pattern
here. You seem to settle too
easily for things.
CARL
You're right. I do.
BEN
No, well, there you go. You
just did it again. I suggested
something and you immediately
agreed.
(CONTINUED)
24.
22 CONTINUED: 22
CARL
You're right. I did.
BEN
Why do you think you do that?
CARL
I don't know.
BEN
Well, sometimes people do it
because they fear rejection or
disapproval, but you can't let
that worry you, Carl. And you
can't agree with things just for
the sake of agreeing. Stand
your ground. Don't let people
roll over you.
The door opens and Jelly enters.
JELLY
Dr. Sobol?
BEN
Excuse me! I'm in a session here.
JELLY
Yeah, I know, I'm sorry.
BEN
You're... You're one of the guys
I rear-ended the other night.
JELLY
Bingo.
(to Carl)
Get outta here.
Jelly takes Carl by the elbow and lifts him off the
couch.
JELLY
Upsa-daisy. You got a coat,
nutbar?
BEN
What are you doing?
JELLY
He's leaving.
(CONTINUED)
25.
22 CONTINUED: (2) 22
BEN
The hell he is. He's not going
anywhere until we're done with his
session.
Jelly pulls a big roll of bills out of his pocket,
removes the rubber band, and peels off a couple of
fifties.
JELLY
(to Carl)
I'll give you a hundred bucks to
get out of here.
Carl looks at the money, then he gives Ben a plaintive
look.
BEN
Don't take it, Carl.
Carl looks back to Jelly.
JELLY
(peeling off another
bill)
A hundred and fifty.
BEN
He's not leaving.
CARL
(trembling)
Three hundred.
JELLY
(pays him)
You're not that fuckin' crazy.
Carl takes the money, gives Ben the thumbs up and
exits. Jelly follows him to the door and waves for
someone to come in.
BEN
Listen, if you're upset about your
car, I can understand that. But
you don't just barge in here --
Paul Vitti steps into the office. Ben freezes. Jelly
crosses to take Vitti's coat.
VITTI
You know who I am?
(CONTINUED)
26.
22 CONTINUED: (3) 22
BEN
Yes.
VITTI
No you don't.
BEN
Okay.
VITTI
You've seen my picture in the papers?
BEN
Yes. And no. Sometimes. Never.
VITTI
Jelly, wait outside.
Jelly exits. Vitti walks around the room, taking
everything in. He picks up the phone and listens. Hangs
up.
VITTI
Sit down.
BEN
Sure.
Ben sits quickly on the coffee table. He crushes a box
of tissues, then moves them out from under his ass.
Vitti picks up a stack of CDS and looks through them.
VITTI
Tony Bennett, huh?
BEN
Yeah. He's my favorite.
Vitti picks up an autographed baseball bat from Ben's
desk.
BEN
(puts up his hands)
Mr. Vitti, I tried to give the guy
my insurance information, but he
wouldn't take it. Seriously, I
tried several times because it was
all my please don't kill me.
VITTI
I was just gonna ask if you liked
baseball.
(CONTINUED)
27.
22 CONTINUED: (4) 22
BEN
Yes. Big Yankee fan.
Vitti puts the bat down.
BEN
Mr. Vitti. Not that it's your
fault, but your friend, he
interrupted a patient's session
and that's -- not good. I think
this is a matter for our insurance
companies, don't you think?
VITTI
I don't care about the car.
BEN
Then what -- ?
VITTI
A friend of mine is having a
problem and he might have to see a
shrink, so I'm going to ask you a
couple questions. Do we sit?
BEN
Whatever makes you comfortable.
Ben starts for his chair, but Vitti sits in it first.
Ben sits on the couch. Vitti adjusts the cuffs of his
shirt, and runs a hand down the crease in his slacks.
VITTI
Okay, the first thing I gotta know
about is privacy. You must hear
a lot of weird shit in here. How
do I know you won't go testifying
-- not testifying -- but, you know,
talking about it to somebody else.
BEN
I won't discuss a patient with
anyone for any reason, unless I
know the patient may be a danger
to himself. Like if I'm concerned
a patient might kill himself...
VITTI
Not fuckin' likely --
BEN
-- or kill someone else.
(CONTINUED)
28.
22 CONTINUED: (5) 22
Ben looks to Vitti for a response. Vitti stares at him
for a long, uncomfortable beat.
VITTI
So who starts?
BEN
Why don't you tell me why you think
you need therapy?
VITTI
I don't need therapy. I'm helping
out my friend. You didn't hear me
say that?
BEN
Right. I'm sorry.
VITTI
You guys are supposed to be so
great when it comes to listening.
You can't remember what I said two
seconds ago.
BEN
I'm very sorry.
VITTI
I have to tell you, Doc, I'm not
thrilled with the level of service
up to this point.
BEN
Why don't you tell me about your
friend?
VITTI
He's a powerful guy. Never had
a problem dealing with things,
you know? Now all of a sudden,
he's falling apart. He cries
for no reason. He's having
trouble sleeping. And then he
started having these attacks. You
know, can't breathe, dizzy, chest
pains -- like you think you're
gonna die.
BEN
Panic attacks.
(CONTINUED)
29.
22 CONTINUED: (6) 22
VITTI
What's with all you doctors and
the fuckin' panic? Did I say
panic?
BEN
Not panic. Dizzy -- breathing --
chest pain attacks.
VITTI
Right. So the question is, what
can he do to make it stop?
Ben decides to go for it.
BEN
I'm going to go out on a limb
here. I think your friend is you.
VITTI
You -- you -- you -- you have a
gift, my friend. Go on.
BEN
Medication could help, but if you
really want to get to the bottom
of this, you're going to want to
get some kind of therapy.
VITTI
With you?
BEN
(hedging)
With me? Oh, I don't know. I'd
have to look at my schedule. I'm
very heavily booked right now and
I'm going on a short vacation
tomorrow.
VITTI
Where you going?
BEN
I don't really share that
information with...
VITTI
Where?
BEN
Miami Beach.
(CONTINUED)
30.
22 CONTINUED: (7) 22
VITTI
You know, this could be good. Just
getting that off my chest, I feel
better already. It's like a load
is off my shoulders. Thank you.
BEN
Well, I really didn't do anything --
VITTI
You did something. The load?
Off. Where is it? Don't know.
You're good, Doctor. I'll be in
touch. But listen to me.
(leaning close,
menacing)
If I talk to you and it turns me
into a fag, I'll kill you. You
understand?
BEN
Could we define 'fag,' because
some feelings may come up --
Vitti silences him with a wave of his hand.
VITTI
I go fag, you die. Got it?
BEN
Yes.
Vitti gives Ben a little pat on the cheek, then turns
and exits. Ben is stunned.
CUT TO:
23 OMITTED 23
23A EXT. BACK YARD - LATER 23A
Ben comes out the back door of the house carrying a
couple of suitcases. Michael follows behind him with
his bags. They cross to the car in the driveway.
BEN
I hope you didn't leave any food
in your room. I don't want to
come home and find a science fair.
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/9/98 31.
23A CONTINUED: 23A
MICHAEL
I didn't. Hey, Dad? One thing
though.
BEN
Yeah?
MICHAEL
I go fag, you die.
BEN
Michael! That's it! I am sealing
that vent.
MICHAEL
You are so cool, Dad. Was that
really Paul Vitti?
BEN
(throwing the bags
in the car)
I didn't ask to see his Mafia
decoder ring, but yeah, it was
him. And you cannot tell anyone
he was here. You understand?
MICHAEL
Should I take it off the internet?
BEN
What?
MICHAEL
I'm kidding!
CUT TO:
24 OMITTED 24
24A EXT. MIAMI BEACH - DAY 24A
Helicopter SHOT of the hotels fronting the crowded beaches.
24B EXT. HOTEL SWIMMING POOL (MIAMI) - DAY 24B
LAURA MacNAMARA, a pretty and charming TV news
correspondent, is on the air live, surrounded by her
camera crew. Kids are frolicking in the pool, splashing
off the water slide behind her.
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/9/98 32.
24B CONTINUED: 24B
LAURA
So judging from the mob scene
around the pool here today, I
think you'd have to say that
there's nothing 'off' about the
'off-season' in Miami Beach this
summer. Now, on a personal note,
this is my last report for
W.V.B.F. I'm getting married
to a wonderful man and moving
to New York, so if you're up
that way, watch for me on the
W.P.I.X. news team. Thanks for
everything, Miami.
(voice catching
slightly)
For the last time, this is Laura
MacNamara, W.V.B.F. news.
She pulls a bouquet out from behind her back and tosses
it to the camera.
LAURA
Catch!
She smiles for a long beat.
PRODUCER
We're clear.
Laura's smile abruptly disappears.
LAURA
(to the crew, all
business)
I'll do the re-asks, then you guys
can just shoot the inserts and
pack it up.
(looks off)
Ben!
Laura runs to Ben, standing on the sidelines, and
embraces him. Michael is there too.
LAURA
This is him, everyone! This is
the guy!
BEN
(to the crew)
Hi, everybody.
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/9/98 33.
24B CONTINUED: (2) 24B
LAURA
(as she hugs him)
Oh, I missed you.
BEN
I missed you too. Michael, say
hello.
MICHAEL
Hi, Laura.
LAURA
(a little too big)
This is Michael? I don't think so.
If I remember correctly, Michael
was a little boy, and this, this
is a great big kid. Hey, you.
Tell us what you did with Michael
Sobol.
Ben and Michael look at each other out of the corners of
their eyes.
LAURA
Okay. Come on. Give me a break.
I'm trying.
MICHAEL
No, it was nice, but I'm fourteen
so it wasn't -- you know -- age
appropriate.
LAURA
(smiles
appreciatively)
Sorry. Just smack me if I do that
again.
(hugs him)
How are you, Michael?
MICHAEL
Great.
There is an awkward silent moment, everyone smiling
uncomfortably.
BEN
Mike, you want to go look at the
camera?
MICHAEL
Why would I want to look at the
camera?
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/9/98 34.
24B CONTINUED: (3) 24B
BEN
'Cause I bet there's all kinds of
cool video stuff over there. Why
don't you check it out?
MICHAEL
(gets the hint)
Oh, yeah.
(to Laura)
Is it okay?
LAURA
Go ahead. If you break something,
don't worry. I'm out of here.
Michael crosses to the camera crew.
LAURA
You think he likes me?
BEN
Michael? He's crazy about you. I
am too.
They embrace.
LAURA
You are? And you still really
want to get married?
BEN
Of course.
LAURA
But what if you get tired of me?
I know so many couples that were
really happy, then they got
married and just completely lost
interest in each other.
BEN
That's not going to be us.
LAURA
I just don't want to lose the
passion.
BEN
Yes, I'm brimming with passion.
I'm up to here with passion.
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/9/98 35.
24B CONTINUED: (4) 24B
LAURA
I want us to be like animals.
You know just screaming and
sweating and tearing at each
other all the time --
BEN
The sweating shouldn't be a
problem. The tearing sounds
painful.
The SOUND GUY crosses over.
SOUND GUY
(embarrassed)
Uhh, Laura? You want me to take
your mic, or at least turn it off?
Laura looks over at the crew. It's obvious that Michael
and the crew have heard this whole exchange.
LAURA
Oh my God.
25 OMITTED 25
& &
25A 25A
25B INT. WALDORF-ASTORIA - HOTEL CORRIDOR - NIGHT 25B
A room service cart with the remains of a sumptuous meal
is standing in the hall outside one of the rooms.
SHEILA (O.S.)
Oh my God! Oh, yes. Oh, yes.
CUT TO:
26 INT. HOTEL ROOM - SAME TIME 26
Vitti is in bed making love to his mistress, SHEILA, a
pretty woman in her late 20s. They're really going at
it.
SHEILA
Oh, yes. Oh, yes.
(then)
Is everything okay, Paul?
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/9/98 35A.
26 CONTINUED: (A1) 26
VITTI
What are you talking for? I'm
trying to do this here.
SHEILA
You seem -- distracted.
VITTI
I got things on my mind. Stop
talking.
SHEILA
Okay, I'm sorry. Just relax,
baby.
He goes back to lovemaking.
SHEILA
(after a beat)
Were you thinking about your wife?
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/21/98 36.
26 CONTINUED: 26
VITTI
No, I wasn't thinking about my
wife.
(a long beat)
Now I'm thinking about my wife.
Goddamn it, Sheila, why can't you
keep your mouth shut!
Completely frustrated now, he gets out of bed, leaving
her alone and confused.
SHEILA
(small voice)
I'm sorry, Paul.
CUT TO:
27 INT. BEN'S MIAMI HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT 27
Ben and Laura are nestled together in bed, asleep.
JELLY (O.S.)
(whispering)
Dr. Sobol. Dr. Sobol.
Ben stirs.
BEN
Mom?
Jelly's head pops up on Ben's side of the bed. Ben wakes
up and his eyes go wide. Jelly puts a finger to his lips.
JELLY
Mr. Vitti wants to see you. I
have your robe.
CUT TO:
28 OMITTED 28
29 UNDERWATER 29
Kelp. Rocks. Bubbles. A mermaid swims INTO VIEW and
meets up with another mermaid. They do beautiful back
flips under the water.
VITTI (O.S.)
You no-good little two-bit piece
of shit bastard!
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/21/98 37.
29 CONTINUED: 29
We PULL BACK to see the mermaids through the viewing
windows of a large tank behind the bar of the --
INT. WIKI WACHI LOUNGE - LITTLE LATER
A tacky dive with a tropical motif. Ben, in his robe, is
being berated by Vitti.
VITTI
I got news for you. I'm still
fucked up. Whatever you did the
other day, it didn't take. You
did nothing for me.
BEN
(indignant)
I did nothing? What did you
expect? I saw you for five
minutes. I don't work miracles,
Mr. Vitti. And I'll tell you
something else. I don't appreciate
it when someone breaks into my
hotel room and kidnaps me. I don't
go for that. I have a family and
a life and a serious practice, and
I don't have time for your
bullshit!
(sheepishly)
That got away from me near the
end.
Vitti stares at Ben.
VITTI
I couldn't get it up tonight.
BEN
(stopped cold)
You mean sexually?
VITTI
No, I mean for the big game
against Michigan State. Of course
sexually!
BEN
You flew fifteen hundred miles and
dragged me out of bed in the
middle of the night because you
couldn't get an erection?
VITTI
Doesn't that prove I'm motivated?
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/21/98 38.
29 CONTINUED: (1A) 29
BEN
You can take a pill for that, you
know.
(CONTINUED)
39.
29 CONTINUED: (2) 29
VITTI
No, that's a cheat. You start with
the pills, next thing you know you
got implants with pumps. I think
a hard-on should be gotten
legitimately or not at all.
BEN
Did you see that embroidered on a
pillow somewhere?
VITTI
Are you gonna help me or not?
BEN
I don't believe this. All right.
Has this happened before?
VITTI
The dead dick thing? Never.
Well, one time. Tonight. And
another time.
BEN
So twice?
VITTI
Do the math. Two times.
(a beat)
There was another time. But it
was after a big meal, so, you
know, that don't count.
BEN
Listen, being unable to perform
three or four times --
VITTI
Five.
BEN
Five times -- it isn't the end of
the world.
VITTI
Maybe not to you -- look at you --
but if I can't get it up, that
makes me less of a man and I can't
have that.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
40.
29 CONTINUED: (3) 29
VITTI (CONT'D)
(moving closer
to Ben)
In my business I deal with
animals. They may seem dumb to an
educated guy like you, but make no
mistake about it, Doctor, animals
are very cunning. And they sense
weakness. Right now I'm an
injured animal. It's only a
matter of time before one of the
lions out there catches the scent.
Then I'm dead. That's the way it
is. If you don't understand that,
then you don't understand the life
I live and you don't understand
me.
BEN
(nodding)
Okay.
VITTI
I have until the end of the week
to get strong or they're gonna eat
me up. If they don't kill me in
the meantime.
BEN
What happens next week?
VITTI
I can't tell you and you don't
want to know.
BEN
It's impossible. I can't do
anything that fast. And even
if I could, what's my goal here?
To make you a happy, well-adjusted
gangster?
VITTI
Look, the other day I saw a
commercial on television, some kid
playing with a couple of puppies.
I cried for 45 minutes. Slap a
pair of tits on me, I'm a woman!
BEN
I'm sorry. I can't help you.
VITTI
You're turning me down?
(CONTINUED)
41.
29 CONTINUED: (4) 29
BEN
Mr. Vitti, when I got into family
therapy, this was not the family I
had in mind. I'm turning you down.
VITTI
You with your schmucky little
office in your schmucky little
house out there in Schmuckville --
you're turning me down? What, so
you can spend more time listening
to housewives piss and moan about
how nobody fucks them right?
BEN
I'd like to go now.
VITTI
(starts to cry)
You see this? This is what I'm
talking about! I'm a dead man!
Ben turns away and starts for the door.
VITTI
(through the tears)
You call yourself a doctor? You
should be ashamed. A real doctor
couldn't turn his back on a person
who's suffering!
BEN
(finally)
All right.
(hands him a
handkerchief)
What happened with your wife tonight?
VITTI
(wiping away his
tears)
I wasn't with my wife. I was
with my girlfriend.
BEN
You have a girlfriend? We could
do two months on that alone.
VITTI
What, you're gonna start
moralizing with me now?
(CONTINUED)
42.
29 CONTINUED: (5) 29
BEN
Okay. Do you have marriage
problems?
VITTI
No.
BEN
Then why do you have a girlfriend?
VITTI
I do things with her I can't do
with my wife.
BEN
Why can't you do those things with
your wife?
VITTI
Hey. That's the mouth she kisses
my children good night with.
What's the matter with you?
BEN
Okay, okay. Have you been under a
lot of stress lately?
VITTI
You mean like seeing your best
friend murdered? Yeah, I got
stress.
BEN
Well, based on what you told me
before about your attacks, I'd
say that's probably it then.
VITTI
It's just stress?
BEN
I doubt if there's anything
physically wrong with you.
VITTI
(brightening, pointing
a finger at Ben)
You. You. You're very good.
BEN
There's a lot more to it --
(CONTINUED)
43.
29 CONTINUED: (6) 29
VITTI
No, you're right. You're right on
the money. I can feel the juices
rushing back to my manhood as we
speak.
BEN
Well, I didn't need to know that.
VITTI
This settles it. You're my
shrink.
BEN
I can't treat you, Mr. Vitti. I
don't think you're really ready to
open up and deal with --
VITTI
Listen to you. The honesty.
Nobody -- and I mean nobody --
talks to me like this. I'm ready.
Let's do it.
BEN
You don't hear the word 'no' that
often, do you?
VITTI
I hear it all the time. Only it's
more like, 'No, no, please, no!'
BEN
(relenting)
All right. I'm here for two more
days. When we get back to New
York, I'll treat you exclusively
for two weeks. I just need to
figure out what to tell my other
patients.
VITTI
You want me to clear your schedule
for you?
BEN
No thanks, I'll handle it. Now
can I go?
Vitti throws his arms around him and kisses him on both
cheeks. A look of concern crosses Ben's face.
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/21/98 44.
29 CONTINUED: (7) 29
VITTI
Thank you.
CUT TO:
29A INT. BEN'S MIAMI HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT 29A
Ben enters. Laura is sitting up in bed, pissed off.
LAURA
What is wrong with you? I woke
up, you were gone, no note or
anything. I've been going out of
my mind, Ben. I walked all over
the hotel looking for you. I
almost called the police!
BEN
Okay, listen. I'm going to tell
you the truth. I had a serious
patient emergency.
LAURA
You have patients in Florida?
BEN
Just one. He followed me here
from New York. I had to go.
LAURA
Who is this patient?
(CONTINUED)
45.
29A CONTINUED: 29A
BEN
Paul Vitti!
(a beat)
Paul Vitti.
A long beat.
LAURA
(worried)
Oh, Ben.
BEN
I know. But don't worry. It's
not like he's a real patient.
He's got this idea in his head
that I'm helping him. It's crazy.
LAURA
You're not going to treat him.
BEN
No.
LAURA
Tell me you're not.
BEN
I'm not!
LAURA
That would be too scary. You
don't want a person like that in
your life, believe me. I've
covered the mob down here. I've
seen what they can do.
BEN
Listen, it's been taken care of.
I told him I couldn't see him
again. He understood and it's
over.
LAURA
You sure?
Ben nods.
LAURA
(tearing up)
I was so worried.
He hugs her and holds her tightly, feeling like a jerk
for lying to her.
CUT TO:
46.
30 INT. SEWING ROOM (NEW YORK) - NEXT MORNING 30
Immigrant garment workers cut and sew fabric.
31 INT. OFFICE - CONTINUOUS ACTION 31
This is Sindone headquarters. A few of his trusted guys
are in attendance: HANDSOME JACK, POTATOES, and MOONY,
his consigliere.
MOONY
It doesn't figure. We take out
Manetta, what does Vitti do?
Nothing. Why doesn't he move?
PRIMO SINDONE, a vain, pompous Mussolini, is standing on
a stool in his underwear, being fitted for a suit by a
nervous tailor.
SINDONE
Fuck him.
MOONY
I'm telling you, Primo, he's
planning something big. The shit
is really gonna come down.
SINDONE
Then let it come down. Vitti's a
tough guy but a lot of tough guys
got fed to the crabs off Red Hook
over the years.
(looking down at
the tailor)
You been down there a long time.
Are you measuring my inseam or
contemplating a lifestyle change?
Sindone nods for the tailor to get out.
MOONY
Primo? What about Vitti?
SINDONE
Vitti. Vitti. The whole time we
were growing up, he was the smart
guy; I was the dope. My father
was a nickel-and-dime shitheel;
his father had it all. Vito
Genovese blew it at Apalachin
because he forgot to kill Gambino
before the meeting.
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
47.
31 CONTINUED: 31
SINDONE (CONT'D)
I won't make the same mistake. I
want Paul Vitti dead -- now. You
two astronauts think you can handle
that?
Handsome Jack and Potatoes nod their agreement.
HANDSOME JACK
You got it, Primo.
DISSOLVE TO:
32 MAN WITH FISH HANGING FROM HIS MOUTH 32
A killer whale leaps up and takes it from between his
teeth.
EXT. MIAMI SEAQUARIUM - CONTINUOUS ACTION
The audience in the stands applaud as the killer whale
splashes back into the water.
32A LAURA AND MICHAEL 32A
are clapping. Ben is clearly bored.
LAURA
(to Ben)
Come on. Get into it.
BEN
I don't understand. They jump
out of the water, they splash,
they eat fish. It's not a real
stretch for a whale. If they
did a number from West Side
Story, then I'd be into it.
LAURA
Just stop.
(to Michael)
We're having fun, right?
MICHAEL
Well, to be real honest. I'm
not having as much fun as it
looks like I am. I'm pretending,
you know, because we have to
bond and everything.
(CONTINUED)
48.
32A CONTINUED: 32A
Laura looks at Ben.
BEN
(to Laura)
You've got to admire the openness.
MICHAEL
(a tad too excited)
Here comes the whale again!
32B TANK 32B
The whale leaps high in the air and crashes back down,
sending a wall of water flying into the first few rows.
JELLY AND JIMMY
walking by the tank, get soaked by the huge wave.
JIMMY
Fuck me!
STANDS
Ben looks and sees Jelly beckoning him.
BEN
(to Laura and
Michael)
I'm hungry. Yeah, I'm going to
get a hot dog. Who wants a
hot dog?
MICHAEL
(rising)
I'll go with you.
BEN
No, I'll go. You're pretending
to have a good time. I don't
want to spoil that. Be right
back.
CUT TO:
33 EXT. VOMITORIUM - MOMENTS LATER 33
Ben confronts Jelly and Jimmy, who are soaked to the skin.
(CONTINUED)
49.
33 CONTINUED: 33
BEN
What is this? Are you guys
following me?
JIMMY
Fuckin' fifteen-hundred dollar
suit. You think the whales piss
in that water?
JELLY
No, I think they use the men's
room next door at the Burger King.
(to Ben)
Mr. Vitti wants to see you.
BEN
Is this a joke?
JELLY
You're an employee of Mr. Vitti's.
That means you're on call twenty-
four hours a day just like the
rest of us.
BEN
No, he and I discussed this. I
told him I'd see him when I got
got back to New York.
JELLY
Don't be a skavootz. It is what
it is. If he needs you sooner,
you go.
BEN
No, I'm not going, and if you
bother me again I won't treat him
at all. Understand? That's it.
End of story.
CUT TO:
34 AQUARIUM VIEWING WINDOW 34
Ben plunges into the tank in the middle of a school of
sharks. He screams silently underwater and swims
desperately for the top.
A couple of families watching THROUGH the viewing window
laugh and applaud as if it's part of the show.
CUT TO:
50.
35 SANDCASTLE 35
An alligator loafer steps down on it. We TILT UP TO a
SEVEN-YEAR-OLD BOY with a shovel and pail.
BOY
Asshole.
After a beat, a ten dollar bill falls where the
sandcastle was. The Boy's face instantly brightens.
BOY
Thanks, mister.
EXT. BEACH - DAY
The alligator loafer belongs to Jelly. He's walking with
Jimmy and other bodyguards who form a loose protective
perimeter around Ben and Vitti as they walk along the
shore. All the guys are wearing loud Jersey beach
outfits.
BEN
They threw me in the shark tank,
Paul. The shark tank!
VITTI
They were trying to make a point.
BEN
What, that you're a scary guy?
I get it.
VITTI
You're in a mood, you know that?
BEN
Yeah, I get that way when a shark
tries to chew on my ass.
VITTI
Okay. Okay. Calm down.
BEN
I don't want to calm down. My
girl friend saw me all wet?
I told her I fell into a tank
with the manatees. I lied to
her last night, now this. I
don't like it.
VITTI
Manatees. That's a funny word.
Manatees.
(CONTINUED)
51.
35 CONTINUED: 35
BEN
I'm glad you're entertained.
What's the problem?
VITTI
Oh, I can tell you really care.
BEN
Okay. What's going on?
VITTI
I had an episode. Not an actual
panic attack, but I started
panicking a little thinking I
might have one. Does that seem
weird to you?
BEN
I'm redefining 'weird' on an
hourly basis. What were you
thinking about when you started
feeling anxious?
VITTI
I don't know. The usual bullshit.
Family problems.
BEN
Which family?
(referring to
bodyguards)
This one?
VITTI
No, regular family.
BEN
(stops)
I want you to draw a picture of a
house. In the sand.
VITTI
What kind of house? A warehouse?
A whorehouse? My house? What
house?
BEN
A house.
VITTI
Why?
BEN
I'll tell you after you do it.
(CONTINUED)
52.
35 CONTINUED: (2) 35
Vitti bends over and starts drawing in the sand.
VITTI
This is good. I come to Florida
and draw pictures in the sand like
a jerkoff.
36 BENCH 36
TINO, a local Miami hitman, is covertly watching Ben and
Vitti on the beach. He talks into a cell phone.
TINO
I don't know what they're doing.
He's talking to some guy. Looks
like Vitti is drawing something in
the sand... What's he drawing?
What am I, Superman? I'm a
hundred yards away -- I can't see
shit... No way, he's got that fat
Jelly with him and his partner,
Jimmy Boots. We could take him
out with a rifle and a scope, but
I don't have any of that shit with
me. My scope's in the shop...
Nah, it's a warranty item... Hey,
don't sweat it. You told me to
take care of him, I'll take care
of him... Okay, I'll call you
back.
37 BACK ON BEACH 37
Vitti finishes drawing.
VITTI
There. You happy?
BEN
Where are the people?
VITTI
What people? You told me to draw
a house.
BEN
I know. But usually when people
draw a house they draw people.
Where are the people who live in
your house?
(CONTINUED)
53.
37 CONTINUED: 37
VITTI
Well, you see, they'd come out and
say hello, but the whole family's
in the Witness Protection Program.
It's very sad. What the fuck you
want from me?
They start walking.
BEN
Okay, forget the house. I'm going
to say some words, and you say
the first thing that comes into
your mind.
VITTI
Good, more games. Shoot.
BEN
Home --
VITTI
-- plate.
BEN
Mother --
VITTI
-- fucker.
BEN
Father --
VITTI
-- forgive me for I have sinned.
BEN
Wife?
VITTI
(clears his throat)
Love.
BEN
Son?
Vitti looks out to sea.
BEN
Son?
Ben can't see his face, but Vitti's eyes are full of
tears. He wipes his eyes.
(CONTINUED)
54.
37 CONTINUED: (2) 37
VITTI
See this? Again with the crying.
Let's get out of here. We're
being watched. Don't look.
There's Feds on the roof of
the hotel.
BEN
How do you know that?
VITTI
I'm a criminal. It's my job.
CUT TO:
38 EXT. HOTEL ROOF - DAY 38
FBI AGENTS STEADMAN, RICCI, and PROVANO CLICK away with
long-lens CAMERAS as they watch from the rooftop.
AGENT RICCI
Who's the new face?
AGENT STEADMAN
I don't know. Get somebody down
there to see what he drew in the
sand.
AGENT PROVANO
Whoever this guy is, he must be
important to the family.
AGENT STEADMAN
Maybe he's Vitti's new
consigliere. Put his picture
on the wire and see what you
come up with.
CUT TO:
39 INT. VITTI'S SUITE - DAY 39
Vitti, Ben and Jelly enter the suite. MARIE, Vitti's
wife, and their children, THERESA, 14, ANNA, 10, and
ANTHONY, seven, are there. Vitti greets them warmly,
suddenly a different man.
VITTI
Look at this, the whole crew.
(kissing Marie)
You all right? Good flight?
(CONTINUED)
55.
39 CONTINUED: 39
MARIE
Yeah, we're fine. We're on our
way to the pool. Kids, get your
stuff. We'll get out of your way.
VITTI
That's okay. Marie, this is a
friend of mine, Ben Sobol.
(as they AD LIB
greetings)
He's -- from the boat. A fishing
boat captain. Cuban refugee.
MARIE
(shaking his hand)
Nice to meet you, Senor Sobol.
Ben looks to Vitti, then to Marie.
BEN
Gracias.
VITTI
And this is Theresa and Anna --
ANNA
Anne.
VITTI
-- Anna, and the big guy, Anthony.
Anthony gives Ben a manly handshake.
ANTHONY
How you doin'?
BEN
Nice to meet you.
VITTI
(noticing Theresa's
bikini)
Jesus, Theresa, you are not
wearing that suit to the pool.
THERESA
What do you want me to wear, a
one-piece?
VITTI
I want you to wear one of those
Arab bathrobes with a veil over
your face, is what I want.
(CONTINUED)
56.
39 CONTINUED: (2) 39
THERESA
Mom!
MARIE
Don't worry about it, Paul. We'll
be back in time for dinner.
VITTI
Okay, babe. Hey, Anthony. Guess
what I got?
ANTHONY
What?
VITTI
(holds up some
tickets)
Marlins and the Braves -- right
behind home plate, tonight.
ANTHONY
You and me?
VITTI
Of course, you and me.
(hugs him)
Have fun at the pool. Stay out
of the deep end. And don't swim
for a couple hours after you eat.
ANTHONY
Okay, Papa.
He kisses his father and exits with the others.
VITTI
(to Jelly)
Send Jimmy down with them.
JELLY
Already done.
Jelly exits.
BEN
Nice family. Cuban fishing boat
captain?
VITTI
I can't tell Marie you're a
shrink. She'd worry, you know.
(CONTINUED)
57.
39 CONTINUED: (3) 39
BEN
About this? I think she'd be
more worried about your career
choice.
VITTI
Just keep going with the therapy.
He crosses to the bar, pours himself a drink, and lights
a cigarette.
BEN
You know, normally a patient
wouldn't smoke or drink during a
session.
VITTI
(blowing smoke)
That's an interesting fact I'll
have to remember if I'm ever on
'Jeopardy.'
BEN
So tell me about your father.
VITTI
My father. He was a big man in
the neighborhood -- very well
respected. Everybody loved him,
God rest his soul.
BEN
He passed away?
VITTI
No, I just like saying 'God rest
his soul.' Yeah, he passed away.
He died when I was about twelve.
BEN
How?
VITTI
Heart attack. Sudden thing.
BEN
Were you and your father close?
VITTI
Close? Yeah, you know, pretty
close. I guess we weren't getting
along that great right then.
(CONTINUED)
58.
39 CONTINUED: (4) 39
BEN
Why was that?
VITTI
I was hangin' out in the
neighborhood. I had a borghata
-- like a kid gang -- hooligan
shit, nothin' big. But my
father didn't like it.
BEN
You fought about it?
VITTI
He slapped the shit out of me.
BEN
And then?
VITTI
And then that night he died.
BEN
How did that feel?
VITTI
It felt great! How did it feel?
(shrugs)
I don't know.
BEN
Well, think about it. Were you
angry, were you afraid? Sad?
VITTI
Yeah, I guess.
BEN
Any feelings of guilt?
VITTI
About what? I didn't kill him.
BEN
I'm just speculating, but maybe in
some way you wanted him to die.
VITTI
Why would I want my father to die?
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/24/98 59.
39 CONTINUED: (5) 39
BEN
Well, you said you were fighting.
You were rebelling against his
authority. There may have been
some unresolved Oedipal conflict.
VITTI
English.
BEN
Oedipus was a Greek king who
killed his father and married his
mother.
VITTI
Fuckin' Greeks.
BEN
It's an instinctual developmental
drive. The young boy wants to
replace his father so he can
totally possess his mother.
VITTI
Are you saying I wanted to fuck my
mother?
BEN
It's a primal fantasy --
VITTI
Have you seen my mother? That is
the sickest fucking thing I've
ever heard.
BEN
It's Freud.
VITTI
Well, then Freud's a sick fuck,
and you are too for bringing it
up.
CUT TO:
39A OMITTED 39A
and and
40 40
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/24/98 60/61.
40A INT. OCEAN VIEW RESTAURANT - NIGHT 40A
Laura's family, the MacNamaras, and a few close friends
have gathered for the rehearsal dinner. There are three
tables in a roped-off section of the restaurant with large
floral centerpieces, a small bar in the corner. The
MacNamaras, SCOTT and BELINDA, are standing with Laura,
Ben, Michael and a couple of other relatives.
BELINDA
Well, isn't this wonderful, all
of us finally getting to spend
some time together.
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/22/98 62.
40A CONTINUED: 40A
SCOTT
All set for the big day, Ben?
BEN
Can't wait, Scott. Can I call
you 'Scott?'
SCOTT
My friends call me 'Captain.'
BEN
Captain.
BELINDA
Well, if tomorrow goes as
well as the rehearsal, I'd say
it's going to be a beautiful
wedding.
BEN
Yes, thanks for going to all this
trouble, and I have to thank you
and the Captain for something
else.
SCOTT
For what?
BEN
(pointing to Laura)
For this.
Everyone "ahhs" as Ben gives Laura a peck on the cheek.
Michael makes a face.
LAURA
(to Ben)
Would you like a drink, because
I'm definitely having eight or
nine.
BELINDA
(disapproving)
Shall we go to the table?
As the woman go to their seats, Scott holds Ben back for a
private moment.
SCOTT
Ben, there's a lot I'd like to
say to you, but I'm going to
skip the big father-in-law
speech because I know you've
been married before.
(CONTINUED)
ANALYZE THIS - Rev. 7/22/98 63.
40A CONTINUED: |
