SEYMOUR S. SASSAFRASS (SSS)
That's good cloud. Oh hello there, allow me to
introduce myself. Seymour S. Sassafras at your
service. The bees are buzzing, the flowers are
flowering, and spring has almost sprung, when Peter
Cottontail will be hopping down the bunny trail.
BEE
Bzz bzz bzz bzz bzz
SSS
Great chammering chim checks! You've never heard of
Peter Cottontail?
BEE
Bzz bzz.
SSS
The chief Easter Bunny? He defeated Irontail and saved
Easter from disappearing forever! Does any of this
ring a bell? No? Well surely you've heard of the son,
Peter Cottontail Jr.
BEE
Bzz bzz bzz, bzz bzz!
SSS
My dear bee, you're in for an incredible treat. You're
about to hear the story of how Peter Cottontail Jr.
saved the world from permanent winter.
BEE
Bzz bzz! Bzz bzz bzz bzz bzz bzz
SSS
Well no, there isn't a bee in it.
BEE
Bzz bzz bzz bzz bzzzzzz!
SSS
No, I won't add one.
BEE
Bzz bzz bzz bzz bzz bzz bzz
SSS
(talking over bee) Because, they sting people and
interrupt me while I'm trying to tell my story.
BEE
Bzz bzz bzz, bzz bzz!
SSS
Hang on to your hat! Our story
begins...NOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!!!!!!
The bee having popped his balloons, Seymour falls to
the ground below, where he comically falls into a
barrel and begins floating down a pink lemonade river.
SSS
Here we are, April Valley. Where all the magic
happens. Easter magic that is. And everybody's getting
ready for the big day!
MUSIC BREAK: INTRO SONG
ELROY
Good news, sir...
ANTOINE
Peteeeeer!
PETER
Huh, what? Antoine, Call maintenance. A lever on the
control panel is missing.
ANTOINE
Right away sir!
ELROY
Mr. Cottontail, our productivity is up over one
tenth of one percent over the last three days.
PETER
So that's... good?
ELROY
Yes sir, that's good.
PETER
And we'll be ready for Easter?
ELROY
By a whisker. I really had to light a fire under
that marshmallow cream...
PETER
(gasps) Light a fire?!
ELROY
It's just a figure of speech sir.
PETER
(sniffs air)
ELROY
Uhh... fire! Fiiire!
PETER
Don't worry everyone, it's just a figure of speech.
ELROY
No, FIRE!
Peter grabs a fire extinguisher and uses it to skate
down to the fire like a badass. He puts out the
fire.
PETER
Now! Who was supposed to be watching the nougat?
Come on, somebody speak up.
FACTORY WORKER
Actually sir, a lot of us have been wondering...
PETER
...yes?
FACTORY WORKER
What is nougat?
PETER
Nougat. You know, it's-it's nougat, it's fluffy.
It's chewy, it's partially hydroge-- hey, wait a
minute. I want a name! who's responsible? Elroy?
who's responsible?
ELROY
Don't make me say, sir, please. It'll only make you
angry.
PETER
Oh no. It was Junior... JUNIOR!!!!
SSS
Sounds like Junior's in a little bit of trouble.
Don't worry about the nougat, they made more.
Cut to: a grassy field, where Peter Cottontail
Junior is showing his friends one of his new
inventions.
JR
Ladies and gentlemen! For generations, Easter
bunnies have delivered eggs the old-fashioned way:
hopping down ye olde bunny trail. Today friends, we
welcome the FUTURE. I give you Peter Cottontail
Junior's supercharged Easter basket speed shooter!
CHUNK
Wooooow!
SOPHIE
Cool!
JUNIOR
Let's make bunny history.
He shoots, he splats.
SOPHIE
Or we could make an omelet.
CHUNK
Awesome! Can we do me next?
JUNIOR
The problem must be an imbalance between the drag
coefficient and the lift coefficient.
CHUNK
W--what's that mean?
JUNIOR
No idea.
SOPHIE
Maybe that's the problem?
PETER
Junior!
SOPHIE
Gotta hop! He's so busted!
PETER
Whew! (clears throat) Now. Junior. you missed all
the excitement down at the candy factory.
JUNIOR
I think you're the one missing the excitement Dad.
Check this out-- it's a little something I call... the
future.
PETER
The future looks kind of icky, son.
JUNIOR
Okay, needs some work.
PETER
Let's talk about work. Like watching the nougat
vat.
JUNIOR
What is nougat anyway?
PETER
Nougat, you know it's nougat! It's fluffy, it's
chewy, it's partially hydrogenated-- it's the stuff
you were supposed to be watching, but because you
weren't, it caught on fire!
JUNIOR
Oh. That nougat.
PETER
(sigh) Why does it seem like wherever you go,
trouble is always hopping behind 1 qyou?
JUNIOR
Give me one example!
PETER
Let's see, there was the automatic basket weaving
thingamabobble, a daffodil weeding whatchamacallit,
and who can forget the electronical egg painting
doohickey!
JUNIOR
Dad I said one example, that was three.
PETER
Junior, being head Easter Bunny isn't all fun and
games. Have I ever told you the story of Irontail?
PETER AND JUNIOR (TOGETHER)
His evil trickery almost ruined Easter forever...
PETER
Have I told you this before?
JUNIOR
Once or twice.
PETER
He and I were bitter enemies! and--
JUNIOR
(interrupting) Dad, that Iron Tail story is ancient
history, get over it!
PETER
Ughhh. Okay, I just hope you never have to learn
about him the hard way. Now pick up your toys and
come home.
JUNIOR
Toys! My inventions are the future of Easter!
PETER
The future, the future, the future! Son, we've got
our paws full with the present! And we're doing just
fine without your... improvements. Now don't keep your
mother waiting.
JUNIOR
Ugh, he doesn't get it! weed the flowers one at a
time, Junior. Paint the eggs as slooow as possible,
Junior. Do everything my way, Junior.
MUSIC BREAK: I'M READY
JUNIOR
I'm ready, dad.
New scene. We see a wintery town. Close up on a little
human girl looking out of her window.
SSS
Outside of April Valley the world is wrapped in
winter, and kids everywhere are more than ready for
Spring.
HUMAN GIRL
Mom, will winter ever be over?
HUMAN MOM
We'll know spring is coming when Jack Frost's window
paintings melt away! So it might be a while.
Suddenly there is a super sexy blue lady floating past
the window, just out of view of the humans.
JACKIE
Jack Frost? Darling please. Dear old Jack is so last
century.
She uses her magical ice powers to make the window
frostier.
JACKIE
The names Jackie, Jackie Frost. Write it down.
Suddenly a ray of sun shines through a cloud,
melting the icy window.
JACKIE
Argh! Infernal sunshine ruining another masterpiece!
Jackie whistles and a flying car, driven by a
penguin, pulls up in midair. She gets in.
JACKIE
Home, fish breath. And this time no stopping for
squid tacos.
Cut to: the Cottontail home. Peter and Mrs.
Cottontail are making dinner.
PETER
Why is he in such a hurry to improve everything?
MRS. COTTONTAIL
He takes after you, Peter, he's impatient!
PETER
He's got to slow down a little. A Bunny's got a walk
before he can hop.
MRS. COTTONTAIL
If you were his age and all you got to do was pull
weeds and watch pots boil, you'd try to change
things too.
PETER
Hey, at his age--
MRS. COTTONTAIL
Not with your mouth full.
PETER
(swallows) At his age, I was responsible!
MRS. COTTONTAIL
Right, responsible for goofing off, sleeping late,
dreaming the day away...
PETER
Exactly-- hey!
MRS. COTTONTAIL
Peter, give Junior some real responsibility! He's
not a little kid anymore. There must be something
you could have him do.
PETER
Well, of course it... No...yeah-- yeah! I got it!
Cut to a clock tower on a hill. Peter and Junior are
walking towards it.
JUNIOR
You have got to be kidding. I'm supposed to get
excited about cleaning a clock?
PETER
Son, this is the clock of Spring, one of the four
clocks of the seasons Father Time made.
PETER AND JUNIOR (together)
Without the four clocks, the seasons would never
change.
PETER
...never...change. Have I told you this before?
JUNIOR
Once or twice. But Dad, just polishing the outside?
PETER
And inside. Polishing the most important part, the
spring of Spring.
JUNIOR
Yeah but, can't I, you know, trick it out a little?
take it from analog to digital, slap on some
subwoofers, really make the bass tones pop? (starts
beatboxing)
PETER
No nonono, no improving, no trick outing, no
upgrading. Look, what I'm about to give you is very,
very big. Huge, huge. The big time! It-- it literally
is time and it's very big. It's the big time.
JUNIOR
What was that?
PETER
Nothing. Here we go.
With reluctance, Peter hands Junior the key to the
all-important clock of Spring, putting the power to
control the weather in the hands of his adolescent
son.
JUNIOR
You're giving me the key to the clock of Spring?
PETER
Uh... yeah. Don't lose it. Obviously, right? And do
not-- do not leave the case unlocked! If anything
happens--
JUNIOR
(interrupting) I know, I'm responsible!
PETER
Yes, that is absolutely right, I'm counting on you,
son. (Peter walks away) Good, he's responsible.
Okay. Yup, this is good... Real good.
Unseen, an evil-looking bat watches the two from
atop the clock tower.
MONTRESOR
(chuckles evilly)
Interior, Jackie's ice palace. She is standing next
to an ice chaise with penguin guards and butlers
holding icy drinks on a tray.
JACKIE
I've had enough! I can't bear to watch that awful
sun melt away another one of my masterpieces! I wish
there were no such thing as spring.
MUSIC BREAK: ICE LIFE
JACKIE
Why can't it be winter all year long?
IRONTAIL
Perhaps I can help?
JACKIE
Guards! Intruder! Identify yourself.
IRONTAIL
The name's Tail. Irontail. (make metal tail noise)
JACKIE
Irontail! Like Irontail Irontail?
IRONTAIL
In the fur.
JACKIE
And what brings you to my frozen paradise, my metal-
tushied friend?
IRONTAIL
What if I told you that I have a way to make sure
Spring never comes again?
JACKIE
Hmm. I'd wonder what's in it for you.
IRONTAIL
Revenge. Peter Cottontail stole my job. If I can't
be the Easter Bunny then I'll make sure that Easter
never comes again.
JACKIE
Hmmm. You've got my full attention.
IRONTAIL
Good. Now then... There's this clock in April
Valley...
Cut to the clock of Spring. Junior is outside,
absorbed in his catapult.
JUNIOR
Ready, aim, and happy easter!.......Hmm. Improved
velocity, decreased accuracy. Highly unusual.
IRONTAIL
One more time, what's the plan?
JACKIE
Sshh. Get in, get the spring, get out!
JUNIOR
Excuse me, but you're not supposed to be here.
IRONTAIL
(to Jackie) No magic, you'll give us away. I'll take
care of this. (to Junior) Bless my whiskers, don't
tell me! you're the very picture of your father,
Peter Cottontail.
JUNIOR
I'm sorry, do I know you?
IRONTAIL
Oh dear boy, I grew up here. But I've been far away,
and I've brought some friends to see dear old April
Valley.
JACKIE
Say freeze! (snaps photo)
JUNIOR
Those are some strange-looking bunnies, and, whoa,
that is one very fluffy tail, mister... um...?
IRONTAIL
Don't tell me, a new egg delivery system?
JUNIOR
It's just a prototype, really.
IRONTAIL
Brilliant! So original! Of course, new ideas aren't
really appreciated around here, are they?
JUNIOR
No! I mean-- hey, how did you know?
IRONTAIL
Oh you could say we're two of a kind, you and I.
Inventors, innovators, unappreciated by the
riffraff. Oh, I can see when a bright young bunny is
being cheated out of his chance to shine.
JUNIOR
You can?
Meanwhile inside the clock, the penguins are trying
to steal the spring, but failing comically.
JUNIOR
My dad never listens to me. He just wants to do
things the same old way they've always been done.
IRONTAIL
Your father understands so very little. Now show me
how this marvel works.
JACKIE
Ugh! Do I have to do everything myself?
She shoots an ice ray, freezing all the clock's
inner works.
JUNIOR
...and then you have to adjust the tension on the
spring. Too much tension is bad.
IRONTAIL
You're telling me.
Inside the clock tower, Jackie conjures a crowbar
made of ice and dislodges the spring.
JUNIOR
...But it's got to have enough thrust to get your
payload where it's going! ...I'm still working on--
SOPHIE
Hey, Junior! The calendar day ceremony's about to
start!
CHUNK
Hurry up, Spring's comin'!
JUNIOR
But I gotta finish up here!
SOPHIE
Well... we don't want to be late.
CHUNK
How about we save you a place?
JUNIOR
Wait, guys!
IRONTAIL
Don't worry, Junior, I'll finish polishing the
clock.
JUNIOR
You will?
IRONTAIL
With pleasure.
JUNIOR
Um... you're gonna need this.
Junior hands Irontail the shiny key to the clock.
JUNIOR
Thanks. Hey guys, wait up!
IRONTAIL
Polishing it off that is... (evil laugh) Oh you'll
bring big changes to April Valley all right, Junior.
Big, big changes.
The chauffeur penguin pulls up, they all hop in
Jackie's car and ride away evilly.
...Cut to new scene: All the bunnies are gathered in
the town center for the calendar day ceremony!
PETER
Welcome friends, to another happy calendar day!
JUNIOR
Whoops, excuse me! Comin' through! That's my dad.
PETER
Now, how about we all say goodbye to March, and
hello to April!
Drumroll. Peter rips off the calendar page that says
thirty one to reveal... thirty two!!??? The crowd
gasps as the sky darkens.
ELROY
March thirtysecond? Theeeeeere's no such thing as
March thirtysecond!
PETER
Wh..Wha-?
Peter rips off another page of the calendar.
BUNNY IN CROWD #1
March thirty third?
Peter keeps ripping, but the numbers just keep going
higher. The month of March has become infinite.
BUNNY IN CROWD #2
March fifty first? Hey Cottontail, is this some kind
of joke?
ANTOINE
Peter, March is not ending!
PETER
Well, I can see that.
ANTOINE
What has happened to ze April?
PETER
I don't understand it, Antoine! Elroy!
A thunderclap. Storm clouds gather.
ELROY
I've never seen anything quite like this. I don't
know what could have happened.
PETER
Unless...... Juniorrr!
Junior has broken away from the crowd and in a panic
is sprinting up to the clock tower, panting heavily.
JUNIOR
(heavy breathing... even more heaving breathing) Oh,
Dad... I'm sorry. the key! Where did I put the key?
(more heavy breathing)
He comes upon the icy clock and rushes inside. His
worst fears are confirmed: the spring of Spring is
missing! He screams.
JUNIOR
Aah!
He runs back out into the storm.
JUNIOR
(lots of ah ah ah ah ah ah ah)
Cut to: Junior, alone in his dark kitchen, writing on
a piece of paper.
JUNIOR
Dear Mom and Dad, this is all my fault. I made a
mistake. Now I've got to try to make things right. I
hope you can forgive me, love, Junior.
PETER
(reading) ---love, Junior. I shouldn't have been so
tough on him.
ELROY
Sir, it's the factory. The rain is causing a flood.
PETER
Elroy, you. You're in charge of the factory.
MRS. COTTONTAIL
Peter?
PETER
Antoine, you come with me. We're going to find
Junior!
It's dark and raining hard. Peter and Antoine are
standing on a bridge, over the formerly pink river.
PETER
Ya see him?
ANTOINE
No Peter, I don't see him. Then again I'm three
inches off ze ground. Hurry up!
Lightning strikes the bridge and it breaks in half,
stranding the two on opposite sides of the river.
PETER
Antoine! I can't get across!
ANTOINE
Never fear, Peter. I will find your boy. I will
bring him back. I will not fail. I swear it upon my
honor as a caterpillar, and a citizen of France!
Don't step on me anyone! I'm off!
New scene. Interior, ice palace. Jackie, Irontail,
the penguins, and Montresor the bat are all dancing
around to some sick techno music for slightly too
long. Jackie and Irontail are getting slightly too
close for a children's movie.
JACKIE
Penguins! Make my slightly mangy friend here a
drink.
IRONTAIL
A toast!
JACKIE
To the end of Spring. But wait! Even without Spring
there's still Summer, and that's even worse!
IRONTAIL
Then why stop with Spring? We could just keep going,
you and I.
JACKIE
Put Summer on ice?
IRONTAIL
And put the freeze on Fall?
JACKIE
I see the start of a beautiful partnership. Frost
and Irontail.
IRONTAIL
I think Irontail and Frost has a certain ring to it.
JACKIE
How did you come by that, um, that--
IRONTAIL
Riveted rump? Chrome caboose? Platinum posterior?
JACKIE
Yeah, that.
IRONTAIL
Once upon a time, it was a lovely puff of a tail.
And then a careless, hateful little child ran over
it with his roller skates and lopped it clean off.
And ever since that day, I have had to wear this.
JACKIE
So you weren't always Irontail? What was your name
before that?
IRONTAIL
Uh... I-I don't remember.
JACKIE
If we're going to be partners, you have to be honest
with me. Even if we're going to be evil partners.
IRONTAIL
I-It's really not that important.
A penguin whispers something into Jackie's ear.
JACKIE
It's... Fluffy? (cackles)
PENGUINS
(laugh)
IRONTAIL
I knew you were all going to laugh.
JACKIE
No no no, it's a fine name... Fluffy. We're going for
a ride. Come along now penguins... Fluffy!
PENGUINS
(laughter)
Cut to a new, unfamiliar land. Our hero begins his
journey.
JUNIOR
(heavy breathing)
FLUTTER
Look ooooouuuuut!
A robin falls out of the sky and collides directly
with Junior.
FLUTTER
Ooow, you hurt my beak!
JUNIOR
What? You crashed into me!
FLUTTER
And my feathers! You definitely scratched my
feathers!
JUNIOR
Now wait, you just--
FLUTTER
And I itch now! Oh great, I think you gave me lice.
JUNIOR
Lice!?
MAMA ROBIN
My baby!!! What have you done to him? What were you
thinking? He's molting, he's smaller than the other
birds, and you done gave him lice?
JUNIOR
Actually, ma'am, he crashed into me.
MAMA ROBIN
And you! Don't you know rabbits can give you lice?
...So, dear, are you new to Summer Hill?
JUNIOR
Yes, ma'am. I'm here from April Valley.
FLUTTER AND MAMA ROBIN (together)
April Valley!?
MAMA ROBIN
You a little far from home... aren't you?
FLUTTER
What are you doing here?
JUNIOR
I don't have time to explain. I have to find the
clock of summer. Fast!
MAMA ROBIN
Don't worry baby, Flutter will show you the way.
FLUTTER
Mama!
MAMA ROBIN
Don't you mama me. You better mind your Summer Hill
manners. Now, you crashed into this boy, so you're
gonna go on, and you're gonna show him some
hospitality. Now I'm going to sit on your brother.
JUNIOR
Huh?
FLUTTER
He's still in the egg.
JUNIOR
That makes more sense.
Jump to, Junior and Flutter hurrying toward the
clock of summer. But the sky is already darkening.
JUNIOR
...and I think they're gonna try to do the same
thing to the clock of summer that they did to the
clock of spring!
FLUTTER
Wow.
JUNIOR
Yeah. Wow. Come on, let's go!
It's just as they feared. The clock is frozen and
dark clouds cover the sky. In a watermelon patch
beneath the clock, strange, muffled noises can be
heard.
CHIPMUNK
Halp!...halp!...(struggle noises)
A frenzied chipmunk bursts forth from inside a
watermelon.
CHIPMUNK
They jumped me from behind! They stole the sun of
summer from inside the clock! Now summer won't
come!
FLUTTER
Listen, I gotta get home.
CHIPMUNK
The flowers won't flower!
FLUTTER
My mom is calling,
CHIPMUNK
The melons won't melon!
FLUTTER
So I'm out of here.
CHIPMUNK
The vegetables won't vegetate!
FLUTTER
See ya!
CHIPMUNK
And eggs won't hatch!
Flutter stops in his tracks, aghast. Now it's
personal.
...Cut back to April Valley, where snow is falling
from an icy sky.
ELROY
The cold weather's making things difficult
throughout our operations, sir. You see, the
chickens can't lay eggs, the chocolate is frozen
solid, and the nougat, sir, well the nougat...don't--
don't make me explain it, I can't describe it.
PETER
(exasperated) Any sign of Junior yet?
ELROY
Unfortunately, sir, no.
PETER
I'm counting on you, Antoine.
Meanwhile, Antoine is wriggling as fast as he can
through a dark and cloudy summer hill.
ANTOINE
(panting) Don't worry, Junior, I am on my way! Just
sit tight.
We cut to a new place with harmonica music and
cornstalks. A family of mice is scrounging for corn
cobs.
MUNCH
(grunting) Okay, don't anyone help me!
PAPA MOUSE
Munch, honey, leave it! There's nothing left.
MUNCH
Maybe we could just lick it.
Suddenly a hungry looking cat appears.
MUNCH
(gulps)
PAPA MOUSE
Run for your lives!
MAMA MOUSE
Move it!
MUNCH
What is it with cats anyhow? Why don't you open a
can or something?
Munch scurries behind some cornstalks and the cat
passes her by. She appears safe.
MUNCH
(panting) Just once I'd like to see the view from a
few links up the food chain.
Just then we hear a raptor screech. A hawk swoops
down and grabs Munch with its talons!
MUNCH
Aah!
HAWK
Gotcha.
MUNCH
Aah! (Gasps) Oh my gosh. Help!
JUNIOR
Hey did you hear that?
FLUTTER
No.
MUNCH
Help!
JUNIOR
Well did you hear that?
FLUTTER
No. I did not hear that cry for help.
The hawk swoops down low, flying right overhead.
MUNCH
Hel-lo!
JUNIOR
Okay, tell me you heard that.
FLUTTER
Uh, no?
MUNCH
Help!...Help!
JUNIOR
Well go on, go on! you're the one with the wings!
FLUTTER
Fine, I'm going already. You're worse than my
mother.
Flutter flits up into the sky and approaches the hawk
with hesitation.
MUNCH
It's about time!
FLUTTER
Hey, what you got there?
HAWK
Lunch.
FLUTTER
You gonna eat that? Grrrross.
MUNCH
I'm not food!
FLUTTER
Okay, you asked for it...Robin attack!
Flutter and the hawk begin an epic chase through the
trees.
MUNCH
Get your big claws off of me! Aaaaaaaaaaaahhh!!
Tiny Flutter bonks the hawk on the head repeatedly.
HAWK
Back off, bon bon.
FLUTTER
Drop it! Drop the mouse!
MUNCH
Yeah!...No. No dropping! No dropping! No
droooooooooooooooooo-.......
FLUTTER
Incomiiiing!
MUNCH
aaaAAHHHH...oof!
A quick-thinking Junior catches Munch.
JUNIOR
Gotcha!
FLUTTER
Look ooouuuut!
JUNIOR
Not again.
FLUTTER & JUNIOR (simultaneous)
Oof!
FLUTTER
Hey, thanks for breaking my fall.
JUNIOR
Don't... mention it.
They both look over to Munch, who is laying on the
ground, eyes closed. Is she dead?
MUNCH
...He gone?
JUNIOR
Yeah.
MUNCH
Nice catch. where'd you get your pilot's license,
off a birdseed box?
FLUTTER
You're welcome.
JUNIOR
Let's go, flutter.
MUNCH
Hey, you guys hungry?
JUNIOR
Sorry. We have an appointment with the clock of
Fall.
FLUTTER
Actually I do need to eat regular periodic small
meals.
MUNCH
Come on. I know where we can get something good!
Munch leads them to a tree with juicy apples. Flutter
flies up, tries, and fails to pull one off the tree.
JUNIOR
Okay, plan B.
In an epic montage, Junior brilliantly combines a
board, fulcrum, and rock, making him the inventor of
simple machines. He jumps on the board, launching
the rock. It hits the apple but bounces off, hitting
Junior in the face, likely giving him lifelong brain
damage.
JUNIOR
Figures. My ideas never work.
Magically, the apple falls on its own and rolls over
to Munch, who takes a satisfied bite.
MUNCH
Aaaah. So! Where we off to now?
Cut to a dark and stormy Summer Hill. Antoine the
french caterpillar has come upon the clock, and
underneath it, a burst open watermelon.
ANTOINE
Zere was a struggle here...[sniffs] there were three
penguins...in prosthetic ears!and one slightly mangy
bunny... [sniffs] a gopher...no! a chipmunk! was
imprisoned...in a papaya...no no! a watermelon... I
love watermelon! my quest...continues!
Cut back to our newly formed trio, who are journeying
through the forest of Fall Falls.
MUNCH
I told you, all I needed was a little pick-me-up!
Hurry up, we're almost there!
The clock comes into view. Four penguins and a bat are
teetering in front of it, stacked high in order to
reach the clock face and remove the leaf of Fall.
JUNIOR
(girly gasp)
Junior whips his head around to see Irontail and
Jackie Frost standing to one side, watching as their
minions do their bidding.
JUNIOR
Those are the guys I was tellin' ya about!
FLUTTER
Get down!
MUNCH
Let me at `em!
JUNIOR
Get down! Guys, we're only gonna get one shot at
this.
MUNCH
You got a plan?
JUNIOR
Do I got a plan!
IRONTAIL
The spring of Spring, the sun of Summer, and the
leaf of Fall. You know what this means? The seasons
have stopped changing, and all that remains is
winter.
JACKIE
Yes but, don't you think that you should let me take
care of those little baubles?
IRONTAIL
Ease up, Jackie my dear. Stop being such a control
freak.
JACKIE
Don't call me that.
IRONTAIL
Control freak?
JACKIE
No, "my dear."
Suddenly a dozen pinecones are launched into the
sky, falling around Jackie and Irontail.
JACKIE
Who is doing that?
JUNIOR
That WHO...would be me!
IRONTAIL
Cottontail...
Temporarily distracted by a pinecone to the face,
Irontail drops the clock parts. Flutter and Munch
swoop in and grab them.
IRONTAIL
Ow! Ow!
JACKIE
After them!
Another epic chase montage. Flutter and Munch manage
to evade Jackie's ice rays and bring the items back to
their leader.
FLUTTER
Here, Junior!
MUNCH
We did it!
IRONTAIL
Hand em over, kid.
JUNIOR
Never! Never in a million years! Never in-- hey!
IRONTAIL
Just like your father. Say hi to him for me. (make
metal tail noise)
Irontail removes the fake fluff from his butt
revealing his iron tail, shaking it around all
sassy.
JUNIOR
Iron Tail!
JACKIE
Oh and kids? If I were you, I'd bundle up. It's
going to be a very, very cold LIFE! AAHAHAaahahaaaa!
JUNIOR
Look, face it, we're toast.
MUNCH
Hmm, toast? Where?!
JUNIOR
Will you stop thinking about food?! We blew it. It's
over.
MUNCH
Well if your stupid invention worked like it was
supposed to...
FLUTTER
Well if you didn't have to eat your own weight every
ten minutes...
MUNCH
Maybe if you weren't such a chicken.
FLUTTER
I'm not a chicken. I'm a robin.
JUNIOR
Here's an idea, why don't both of you just face
facts? Ever since we met, absolutely nothing has
gone right. Your baby brother is never gonna hatch.
Your family is never gonna have anything to eat, and
I'll never be able to go home again.
FLUTTER
Uh, Junior?
MUNCH
Where are we?
SSS
Our heroes found themselves in a magical, colorful
place, Color Land! Where every color of the rainbow
comes from....And soon they came upon the soul
resident of Color Land, Seymour S. Sassafras! They
should be arriving... right about now.
JUNIOR
Who should?
SSS
You should!
JUNIOR
Should what?
SSS
Be arriving! And you're about to ask for my help.
JUNIOR
And...do you give it to me?
SSS
I...I-I can't remember...Oh! Yes, yes I do. Follow
me. And so they walked across the bridge. And Mr.
Sassafras told him that Jackie and Irontail's plan
was to plunge the world into permanent winter.
ALL
(gasp)
SSS
Don't worry! ...Sassafras's incredible bustproof
bubble never bobbles! At least it hasn't yet!
Mr. Sassafras leads them to a wacky-looking
contraption that looks like a giant bubble attached
to an air pump.
JUNIOR
This is all my fault. Why do I spend so much time
dreaming about tomorrow?
SSS
It's important to dream about tomorrow, Junior, but
you have to take care of today. It's a classic
today-tomorrow problem.
They climb into the giant bubble and it begins to
rise.
JUNIOR
Bye, Mister Sassafras! Oh, by the way, how do we get
down?
SSS
Not a problem! Just pull the rip cord!
FLUTTER
Ah, first-class travel!
MUSIC BREAK: MAKE IT APPEAR
We cut to Antoine, who is struggling through a
blustery Fall Falls.
ANTOINE
I am persisting in my quest. At this rate I will
never find the junior! Time...is my enemy. AAAhh! I
meant to do that!
Meanwhile, in the sky bubble, our heroes are fast
asleep.
WIND
[Sinister roaring noises]
FLUTTER
What was that?
JUNIOR
I don't know!
WIND
Rrroooaarrr!
FLUTTER
Ok...ok...ok! Let's do somethin'! Like get out of
here?
JUNIOR
Maybe if we raise the average kinetic energy
quotient to offset the external inertia!
MUNCH
What does that mean?
JUNIOR
It means we gotta get out of here! Come on!
They throw themselves at the bubble's interior walls
frantically, to no avail.
FLUTTER
Nobody tell my mama I did that.
WIND
Rrroooaaarr!
ALL
Aaahhhh!
WIND
Gotcha! Ha ha ah ahaha ah! Got you good! You should
see the looks on your faces! Hahahahaa!
JUNIOR
What is the matter with you? That's no way to treat
people!
FLUTTER
Didn't your mama teach you manners?
MUNCH
We're starving in here!
JUNIOR
And we have to get to Winter Ridge as soon as
possible!
WIND
Sorry, sirs, ma'am.
MUNCH
Hey, maybe he could help us get there.
WIND
Hmm, Winter Ridge? Okay now uh, that's quite a
distance.
FLUTTER
Yeah, but for the north wind, one big huff could do
it right?
WIND
Ha ha ha ha ha! The North wind! Hahaha! The North
wind? Is that what I look like to you? Hahahaha!
JUNIOR
Uhh I'm sorry, the Western wind?
WIND
Ahahahahah! I guess I can't expect a bunny to know.
Heh heh heh heh. Thanks for the compliment. No, I'm
not one of these big "celebrity winds." Ga ha ha ha
ha ha...
JUNIOR
But you are a wind, right?
WIND
Oh yeah, sure! Have you ever heard of the East by
Southwest wind? Well, you're looking at him.
MUNCH
Oh, great. Stuck in midair with the East by
Southwest wind.
WIND
Let's not get personal now. I could send you back
the other way.
JUNIOR
No! She's sorry Mr. Wind, sir. She gets crabby when
she's hungry.
WIND
Really? Same here!
JUNIOR
It's just we really need whatever help--
WIND
(interrupting) It's ok, it's ok, listen. I can tell
you're good people. I'll do whatever it is I can.
Mmmm?
JUNIOR
Great! Thank you so much, Mister...
WIND
Just call me Wind! Get ready now! (warmup blowing
noises)
FLUTTER
This guy couldn't blow out a birthday candle!
WIND
Just getting warmed up, just getting warmed up.
Lemme try again. (more crazy noises)
MUNCH
I should have brought along some buffalo wings.
FLUTTER
What?!
WIND
Hang on, hang on! I almost caught it that time. (big
inhale, big blow)
ALL
Yeah! Woohoo! You did it! Etc.
WIND
Thank you, thank you.
SSS
While our heroes tried and tried to get themselves
to Jackie Frost's fortress, April Valley looked more
like February Valley.
WIND
(blowing, blowing, running out of steam...)
MUNCH
We're here!
WIND
Whew. We are? Thank goodness, I'm a little
lightheaded. Whoa.
JUNIOR
You were awesome! I mean not quite gale-force, but--
FLUTTER
Definitely kite-flying wind!
WIND
Why thank you, gosh, that's nice.
JUNIOR
Now if you could just put us down someplace safe...?
WIND
Down? Mmm, I don't do down. I'm a wind, not a
downspout. Want me to call my cousin?
FLUTTER
Mr. Sassafras said if we ever needed to get down,
just pull the ripcord!
JUNIOR
(grunting noises as he jumps up to pull cord)
Junior pulls the cord, creating a hole in the top of
the bubble. They begin to plummet.
ALL
Aaaaaaaaaaaaahh!
FLUTTER
Assume crash positiooooon!
ALL
[landing painfully] D'oh! Ooh! Ow! Etc....Yeah!
They land on some ice...which immediately breaks off
and begins to sink.
MUNCH
You know, it's always something.
WIND
Yeeeeeeeeeehaw!
JUNIOR
Look!
WIND
[blowing noises]
ALL
Yeah! Woohoo! Etc.
JUNIOR
Bye! And thanks!
WIND
Anytime. Look me up next time you blow through town!
The gang begins to trudge up towards the frozen
palace, sneaking past some dumbass penguin guards.
Inside, Munch slips on some ice, narrowly escaping
death once again.
MUNCH
AAAhhhhhh!
FLUTTER
Grab my wing!
Inside the throne room, Jackie is fitting Irontail for
a royal robe.
IRONTAIL
[sinister chuckle] by morning April Valley will be
frozen solid, and never again will I have to endure
the springing of Spring, the rising of sun, or
the...bringing of bonnets.
JACKIE
Hold still, I say!
Junior, Flutter, and Munch sneak in silently, and
notice the trinkets frozen in a huge block of ice.
JACKIE
That about does it. How's it feeling in the arms?
IRONTAIL
Roomy. A perfect fit.
JACKIE
This will keep you warm in the winter wasteland, now
known as everywhere!
JUNIOR
Munch, do you like eating ice cream?
MUNCH
I love ice cream!
JUNIOR
Well you're in luck.
IRONTAIL
Speaking of perfect fits...
JACKIE
...What? Why are you looking at me like that?
MUNCH
I see the ice but when do I get the cream?
JUNIOR
Just a little bit longer!
IRONTAIL
We make a charming couple, you and I. the whole
world is our frozen oyster
JACKIE
And finally I get to rule it all!
IRONTAIL
You?
JACKIE
Well you didn't think you'd rule it?
IRONTAIL
Oh I think you're forgetting whose idea this whole
scheme was.
JACKIE
Yes, but we took my car!
IRONTAIL
Good point, got me there. How about a power-sharing
arrangement?
The two shake hands. Meanwhile in the corner of the
room, Munch has licked the leaf of Fall free from the
ice. Suddenly, they're spotted by Montresor the bat,
who tugs on Irontail's sleeve.
IRONTAIL
Cottontail!
In this short amount of time, Munch has miraculously
licked all the way to the center of the ice block,
freeing the spring and the other thingies. Epic
penguin battle ensues.
JACKIE
Get them!
JUNIOR
Go wide! Flutter, over here!
Flutter does a sick hockey puck boomerang move with
the sun of Summer, knocking down the ice chandelier
on top of the villains. Then Irontail lifts the
chandelier off them with Edward Cullen-like
strength.
JUNIOR
Quick, Come on! Let's go!
There is a chase scene through the ice tunnels.
JUNIOR, MUNCH, and FLUTTER emerge from the tunnel
and begin walking through a blizzard. Then IRONTAIL
and JACKIE emerge.
JUNIOR
We gotta find our way out of here!
FLUTTER
We gotta hide!
MUNCH
Or at least find a place to stash these things!
FLUTTER
I can't see!
MUNCH
Me neither!
JUNIOR
There!
They come upon a foreboding clock tower made of
ice.
MUNCH
What is this place?
JUNIOR
This must be the clock of Winter!
Suddenly, there is a voice from behind.
IRONTAIL
What, no catapults?
Munch throws a tiny mouse-sized snowball at Jackie.
JACKIE
Oh! How'd you guess, my favorite game!
Jackie traps them in a giant snowball with her epic
sexy snow powers.
IRONTAIL
Irontail and Frost do it again!
JACKIE
I think you mean Frost and Irontail
JUNIOR
I've got an idea! stay here!
MUNCH
Duh.
Conveniently, they are still right in front of the
entrance to the clock tower. Junior effortlessly digs
through the giant snowball and finds himself inside
the clock of Winter. He spots the shiny thingy that
probably controls the seasons. Outside, things aren't
looking good for Flutter and Munch.
IRONTAIL
I think it wise we disposed of these forever.
JACKIE
[evilly] My pleasure...
Jackie is ready to straight up murder these animal
children.
IRONTAIL
I meant these, not those.
Having been discouraged from committing infanticide,
Jackie contemplates the weather-controlling clock
thingies.
JACKIE
I know a place for these where they'll never be seen
again. And lucky for us, it's right over here!
She means this giant convenient cliff-slash-abyss
they're standing next to. Back inside the clock,
Junior is being a genius.
JUNIOR
The timing mechanism must be driven by the master
governor in the upper pivot rod! Okay. Today,
tomorrow, today, tomorrow, now!
He successfully grabs the crystal and exits the clock
tower.
JACKIE
What is with this rabbit?
IRONTAIL
Must be genetic.
Now that junior has removed the last clock piece,
there are no more seasons at all. The ground begins to
shake.
JUNIOR
Uh oh.
Suddenly, the clock tower is surrounded in a
terrifying green vortex, which extends up into the sky
and spreads throughout the land. Cut to April Valley.
PETER
Huh??
ELROY
Oh my.
The same apocalyptic green sky and lightning storm is
happening in Summer Hill, and Fall Falls. Back at the
clock of Winter, Junior has a determined look on his
little bunny face.
JUNIOR
Give us back those and I'll give you back this!
IRONTAIL
Nevah!
Just then, his tail gets struck by a bolt of
apocalypse lightning.
IRONTAIL
Heruuugherughuuuaahghh!...I guess we're open to
negotiation.
JACKIE
Here's the deal, you give us back winter, we'll give
you Fall. I don't mind watching things shrivel.
JUNIOR
Not a chance! It's all or nothin, freeze dry! I'm
not kidding!
Junior dangles the crystal over the cliff's edge.
IRONTAIL
Think you're pretty cute, eh, little tiny bunny? You
drop yours, we drop ours.
FLUTTER
Where you goin?
MUNCH
Goin' to get my munch on! Nom nom nom nom nom
IRONTAIL
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! (his tail makes noise)
JACKIE
Stop that tail ringing!
IRONTAIL
I can't! Ow! Ow ow!
JACKIE
I said cut it out, Fluffy!
IRONTAIL
Anything you want, my dear!
JACKIE
Don't call me that!
Jackie attacks Irontail, and in the struggle, the
leaf and sun fall off the cliff!
IRONTAIL
This is all your fault, my dear!
JACKIE
Oh, Fluffy! Don't turn on me now, Fluffy!
The two fight over the spring.
IRONTAIL
I got it! I got it! I got it!
Jackie pounces again and they both fall off the cliff,
but all the important clock parts fall with them.
FLUTTER
I can't believe I'm about to do this!
MUNCH
Flutter!
Flutter dives down into the abyss, and for a moment
disappears into the darkness.
JUNIOR
Oh, Flutter...
Is he dead? No, this is a children's movie. Flutter
appears behind them, heroically holding all the clock
pieces.
JUNIOR
Yeah!
MUNCH
Woohoo!
Junior restores the crystal to the clock of Winter.
ALL
Woohoo! Yeah! Etc.
MUNCH
That was awesome! We should do this more often.
FLUTTER
Don't EVEN joke about that.
JUNIOR
But how are we gonna get back home?
MUNCH
I am NOT getting back in that bubble.
WIND
Yeeeeeeehaww!
ANTOINE
Did somebody call a taxicab?
The gang climbs on top of mister Wind, and they set
off towards Fall Falls to start making things
right.
WIND
Everybody comfortable?
ALL
Yeah! Woohoo! Etc.
WIND
Let's blow!
Munch returns to Fall Falls, restores the clock, says
goodbye to her new friends, and reunites with her
loving parents.
MUNCH
See you guys!
JUNIOR
See ya, Munch!
FLUTTER
See ya!
MAMA MOUSE
Oh, we were so worried about you!
PAPA MOUSE
Welcome home, honey.
Next stop is Summer Hill, where Flutter restores
Summer.
CHIPMUNK
Thanks, Flutter!
JUNIOR
Bye Flutter!
FLUTTER
Thanks, I had fun! Bye y'all!
MAMA ROBIN
Welcome home baby! Ooh, your mama missed you!
Suddenly, a crack in the egg. Then a chirp!
FLUTTER
Little brother!
Finally, Junior returns home to April Valley.
JUNIOR
Thanks for everything, wind. Catch you later!
WIND
Bye!
He restores the spring of Spring and the clock begins
working again. In the town center, all are gathered.
ANTOINE
Let me through, let me through! Peter, to you I have
made a promise. And today I have kept that promise!
I give to you, your son!
JUNIOR
Mom! Dad!
PETER
Junior!
MRS. COTTONTAIL
We were so worried about you.
ANTOINE
(sniffs) Sadly, Antoine has... no one to hug!
Junior and his mom hug Antoine the hero. Suddenly,
there comes a deep voice from the crowd.
IRONTAIL
what a tender scene!
JACKIE
I'd like to freeze it forever!
PETER
Irontail...! Stay here. Let me take care of this.
Peter advances towards Jackie's onslaught of ice
rays, using the calendar as a shield. One of the
pages rips off.
PETER
Hey, look everyone! April's here!
JACKIE
(shooting magic ice rays)
PETER
[grunting in reaction]
IRONTAIL
Ice him, Jackie!
JUNIOR
Hold on Dad, I'm coming!
ANTOINE
Junior!
Junior heroically jumps in front of his father,
deflecting Jackie's ice ray with the shiny key. The
ice magic ricochets and freezes Jackie instead!
IRONTAIL
Looks like you won another one, Cottontail. I don't
mean to turn tail and run, but it's time to put this
battle on ice.
JACKIE
Excuse me! Aren't you forgetting something?
IRONTAIL
So sorry, my dear.
JACKIE
I'm sorry too, Fluffy!
Jackie shoots a freeze ray at Irontail, who becomes
a big ice cube and comically falls into the pink
lemonade river. The crowd cheers!
MRS. COTTONTAIL
Oh Junior, you're just like your father. Isn't he,
Peter?
PETER
I think he's his own man now. Aren't you, Junior? I
mean, Peter.
JUNIOR
Aw, Dad!
PETER
You know son, I've had a little trouble with the
nougat machinery. I could really use a guy with some
new ideas. If ya know anybody.
JUNIOR
First, for temperature control purposes, I propose
adding a bank of digital thermometers to the nougat
vat...
SSS
And that's the story of the bee who saved arbor
day-- I mean the bunny who saved Spring. Yes, yes!
That's a much better story. Nobody likes bees, they
just sting people and interrupt them, but that's
just my opinion, Seymour S. Sassafras.
|
