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Movie Chat



ALL SCRIPTS




                     THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT



                           Written by

               Lisa Cholodenko & Stuart Blumberg




                                                      August 3,2009


    FADE UP ON:
1                                                                  1

    The humming stillness of an American suburb on a summer's
    day: nannies push strollers, joggers jog, mailmen deliver,
    dogs are walked, kids shoot hoop in wide open driveways.

    On a quiet, tree-lined street we pick up two young athletic-
    looking boys riding bikes. LASER ALLGOOD (15) and his
    friend, CLAY (15).

    Like bats out of hell they pass block after block of
    charming, evenly spaced houses until they round a corner and
    drop their bikes in front of a large ranch house.


    INT. CLAY'S HOUSE - MOMENTS LATER
2                                                                  2
    They walk inside.   We HEAR a baseball game on TV in another
    room.

    INT. CLAY'S, BATHROOM - LATER
3                                                                  3

    Clay pounds on blue pills with a hammer, reducing them to
    powder. Laser watches.
                        LASER
              I don't know, dude.

    Clay cuts the powder into lines with a school ID card.
                        CLAY
              B minus in geometry, yo!   This
              shits the bomb!

    Clay rolls up a dollar bill and takes a snort.   Then hands
    the rolled up bill to Laser.

                        CLAY (CONT'D)
              Add it up, son.
    Laser takes the bill, bends over and snorts a line.


    INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - GIRL'S BEDROOM - DAY
4                                                                  4
    Part Oxford reading room, part teenage girl's lair. Leaning
    against the bed we see JONI ALLGOOD (18). It's her room.
    She pours over a game of Scrabble.

    Sitting next to Joni is her best girl friend, SASHA, (18).
    Sasha's checking out Joni's FACEBOOK PAGE.
                                                             2.

    Joni's best guy friend, JAI (18) sits across from her,
    calculating his next Scrabble move.

                        SASHA
              Oh my God, Joni, there are so many
              hotties in your class. You are so
              gonna hook up the first week.

                        JAI
              Just cause you're a 24 hour drive-
              thru doesn't mean everyone else has
              to be...

                        SASHA
              Hey, she worked her ass off! She
              deserves some hot jock sausage!
    Jai looks repulsed, and hurt.

                         SASHA (CONT'D)
                  (flip)
              Whatever. Why don't you guys just
              do it and get it over with?

    Joni and Jai blush. They're both too scared to admit their
    crush on each other.
                        SASHA (CONT'D)
              What? I'm just asking.

                        JAI
              Uh, maybe because we're friends...

                        SASHA
              Oh, really...?
    Sasha turns to Joni like an agent provocateur.


    INT. CLAY'S HOUSE - TV ROOM - LATER
5                                                                 5
    Laser and Clay wrestle on the floor while Clay's DAD watches
    a baseball game on TV. They bump into the couch. Clay's dad
    looks back, menacing.

                        CLAY'S FATHER
              Hey, ladies! Take it down a notch.

    The boys keep wrestling, wired from the pills. Again, they
    knock into the couch. Clay's dad spins around, pissed.
                        CLAY'S FATHER (CONT'D)
              What did I just say?!
                                                              3.

     The Dad grabs Clay, pulls him off of Laser and over the
     couch. He gets his son in a headlock, forcing the boy's face
     into his big fat sweaty armpit. Both Dad and Clay enjoy the
     brutal play. Clay laughs manically.

                             CLAY
                Let me go!

                          CLAY'S FATHER
                Don't do the crime if you can't do
                the time.
                          CLAY
                Dad, your pits smell like burnt
                ass! Get off me!
     As Laser observes this male-bonding between father and son,
     we note a trace of longing on his face.


     OMITTED.
6                                                                  6

     OMITTED.
7                                                                  7

     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - DINING ROOM
8                                                                  8

     Joni, Laser and JULES ALLGOOD (40's) fair-skinned,
     attractive, sit before well prepared dinner. Still buzzing,
     Laser taps his fingers incessantly on the table.
                           JONI
                Laser!   Knock it off!

                           LASER
                What?!   I'm not doing anything.


     EXT. HOUSE - ESTABLISHING - MAGIC HOUR
9                                                                  9
     NIC ALLGOOD (late 40's) pulls up into the driveway beside a
     beat up white TRUCK covered in AA slogan bumper stickers.


     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - DINING ROOM - EVENING
10                                                             10
     Nic enters.   Drops her bag and heads for the table.

                           NIC
                Hi guys.   Sorry I'm late.
                                               4.

                    JULES
          Don't worry. We just started.

                    NIC
          27 fibroids. All in the lining.

She kisses Jules.

                    JULES
          Honey, that's disgusting.   We're
          eating.
                    JONI
          Did you do that laparoscopically?

                    NIC
          That's right, Smart Girl.   And we
          got `em all.

As Nic settles in...
                    NIC (CONT'D)
          Hey, whose truck is that?

                       JULES
          Mine.
                       NIC
          Yours?

                    JULES
          For the business.

                    NIC
          What business?..
              (getting edgy)
          The gardening?

                    JONI
              (protective)
          Isn't it landscaping.
                    JULES
          Yes, thank you very much.

                     NIC
              (strained)
          Okay...
              (then)
          Do we have any Cabarnet left?
                    JULES
          I didn't look, honey.
                                                             5.

Nic gets up and goes to the kitchen for wine.   Laser's cell
phone RINGS. He answers it.

                    LASER
          Hey, what's up?

Jules puts her hand on Laser's arm.

                    JULES
          Laser, no phone calls at the table.

                    LASER
              (into phone)
          Lemme hit you back.

Laser hangs up.   Nic re-enters with a large glass of red.
                    NIC
              (sitting down)
          Who was that?
                      LASER
          Nobody.    Clay.

Jules and Nic share a look. Jules starts making maternal
windshield wiper strokes with her thumb on Laser's arm.
                    JULES
          Can I ask you something?
          What do you get from your
          relationship with Clay?
                    LASER
          What do you mean, "get"?

Laser looks down at Jules' thumb on his arm.
                    JULES
          Do you feel like he's the kind of
          person who will help you grow?
                    LASER
          Mom, you're windshield wiping me.

                    NIC
          Hey, did you start on those thank-
          you notes for your birthday gifts?

                     JONI
          Not yet.   But I will...
                                                                 6.

                         NIC
               I just think it's easier to knock
               them out when it's fresh.
                         JONI
               Yeah, I know, I'll do them tonight.

                         NIC
               Great...I mean, you don't want to
               have to start with an apology. You
               know? Then it's embarrassing.
                         JULES
               Okay, honey. She got it. Let it
               go.
                          NIC
               Okay, I'll let it go...
                   (then)
               I mean, if it was up to you, our
               kids wouldn't even write thank-you
               notes, they'd just send out good
               vibes.

     Nic takes another swig of vino and smiles at Joni through
     increasingly plum-stained teeth.
                         NIC (CONT'D)
               I can't believe my baby's 18.

                            JULES
               I know...

                         NIC
                   (devolving into baby talk)
               Big girl. You're a big girl...
                            JONI
               Mom...

     Joni mimes wiping her teeth.   Embarrassed, Nic starts licking
     at her stained teeth.


     INT. JONI'S BEDROOM - LATER THAT NIGHT
11                                                                11
     As Joni cranks out thank-you notes, Laser enters.

                            JONI
               What?
     Laser looks nervous.
                                                                7.

                         LASER
               Have you thought any more about,
               you know, making that call...?
                          JONI
               Yeah.   I don't want to.

                         LASER
               Okay...I was just wondering if you
               changed your mind.

                            JONI
               I haven't.

     He starts to leave, but her answer bugs him.    He turns back.
                         LASER
               How can you not even be curious?

                          JONI
               Sorry, Laser. I just don't want
               to, okay? I'm leaving soon and I
               don't want to deal with that right
               now.
                    (co-dependent leak)
               And also, that could really hurt
               moms' feelings...

                         LASER
               God, why do you worry about them so
               much? They don't even have to know
               about it!

                         JONI
               Look, you can do it when you turn
               18, okay?
                         LASER
               I never ask you for anything.

     Laser walks out of the room.   Joni feels horrible.

     INT. NIC AND JULES BEDROOM - THAT NIGHT
12                                                               12

     Nic and Jules lay in bed watching TV, unwinding from the day.
                         NIC
               I just don't understand why you
               bought the truck now.
                                                             8.

                    JULES
          Because if I'm starting this
          business I need something to haul
          my equipment in.

                    NIC
          Okay. It just seems a little
          cart before the horse.
                    JULES
          What does that mean?
                    NIC
          Sweetie, you don't even have any
          clients yet.
                    JULES
          Well you're the one who's always
          telling me to "act as if!"

                    NIC
              (back peddling)
          That's true. I do. You're right.

The women settle back.   Nic sees Jules feels bad.
                    NIC (CONT'D)
          Look, I'm sorry. It's good you
          bought the truck. Its proactive.

Nic caresses Jules' arm, wanting to make it better.
                      NIC (CONT'D)
          Hey...

Jules doesn't look at Nic.   She keeps her eyes on the T.V.
                    NIC (CONT'D)
          Wanna watch a movie?

Jules perks up.    Nic immediately regrets her suggestion.
                    JULES
          A movie-movie?

                   NIC
          Yeah. We haven't done that in a
          while.

MINUTES LATER -- NIC AND JULES
are cozied up side-by-side facing the TV.
                                                                9.

     ANGLE ON - THE TV

     The volume is turned low on TWO NAKED MEN lying on a chaise
     longue. One guy fellating the other.

     INT. STAIRCASE - SAME
13                                                                13

     Joni tiptoes up a dark staircase and enters an office off the
     mom's bedroom. She heads for the desk and stealthy opens a
     drawer. She rummages though with clear intention.
     She pulls out a FOLDER and studies the cover. We see the
     words: "Pacific Cryo Clinic: Bringing your dreams to life."

     INT. BEDROOM - MOMENTS LATER
14                                                                14

     ANGLE ON - THE BED

     We now only see Nic. Jules has slipped under the blanket,
     and is now between Nic's legs. We see Nic trying to get into
     it, but having a hard time.

                         NIC
               I don't like the guys in this one.
               They're too shaved.

                         JULES
               Don't focus on it.
                         NIC
               How about the one with the biker
               gang?

                         JULES
               We left it in Hawaii.

     Jules wrestles with the blankets.    Wants them out of her way.

                         NIC
                   (pulling them back up)
               I'm cold, honey.

                            JULES
               Sorry.     I couldn't breathe.
     Jules wrangles the blankets, trying to cover her partner.
     The transition is awkward and Jules gets caught in the top
     sheet. As Nic repositions herself, she leans on the VOLUME
     CONTROL BUTTON and suddenly the porn is blasting at full
     volume.
                                                               10.

                         MAN IN MOVIE
               Suck that fat cock mother-fucker...

                            NIC
               Shit!!     Where's the remote?!

                         MAN IN MOVIE
               I'm gonna fuck that tight ass!...
     Jules and Nic both dive for the remote. It's lost under the
     mass of bedding. They struggle to find it as the grunting
     and 70's disco music blares.


     INT. OFFICE - JONI
15                                                                  15
     Joni turns to the wall, confused.    She hears the porno music
     pulsing though.


     INT. BEDROOM - MOMENTS LATER
16                                                                  16
     Nic finally recovers the remote and hits mute.

                         NIC
               Jesus Christ!
     Nic flops back, traumatized.

                         NIC (CONT'D)
               The whole neighborhood heard that!
                         JULES
               No, they didn't.

                         NIC
               Well, that was a vibe kill.

     Jules looks defeated.

     INT. OFFICE - MOMENTS LATER
17                                                                  17

     Joni turns back to the file on the desk. She flips though
     some pages of documents and stops. CLOSE ON a PHOTO of a 4
     YEAR-OLD BOY standing in a sandbox looking straight into a
     camera with a big, open grin.

                                                    MATCH CUT TO:
                                                             11.

     EXT. FARM - DAY
18                                                               18

     We see that boy, 35 years later, carrying a box of tomatoes
     and putting them in the back of a truck. This is PAUL, Joni
     and Laser's biological father.


     INT. PAUL'S RESTAURANT - "WYSIWYG"    - DAY
19                                                               19
     Paul walks in carrying the box of tomatoes. He approaches
     TANYA, (30's) the restaurant's super sexy hostess.
                         PAUL
               How you doing, foxy?

                         TANYA
               Mm, flapjack, you're smelling ripe.

                         PAUL
               Oh, sorry...
                         TANYA
               No, I like it. It's earthy.

                         PAUL
               What can I say. I've just been out
               there, you know...hoe-ing.
                   (looking at the seating
                    chart)
               How's it looking tonight?
     They stand close to each other, peering at the chart.

                         TANYA
               Gonna be tight.
                           PAUL
               Really...

     Paul's cell rings. He gives Tanya a hand squeeze and heads
     for the kitchen, answering.
                           PAUL (CONT'D)
               Hello.

                         WOMAN'S VOICE
               Hi, is this Paul Hatfield?

                          PAUL
               It is.   Who's this?
                                                              12.

                         WOMAN'S VOICE
               My name is Wendy Minter. I'm
               calling from The Pacific Cryobank.
                          PAUL
               Okay.   What can I do for you?

                         WENDY
               I just need to confirm that you
               donated sperm with us between 1991
               and 1993.
     At the mention of the word sperm, Paul goes pale.

                         PAUL
               Yeah...I did a little bit of that
               back then...


     INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS
20                                                              20
     Paul enters. The kitchen is humming with COOKS prepping for
     the dinner rush. He looks around for a quiet spot.

                         WENDY
               As you know the Cryobank has a
               confidentiality policy which
               prohibits us from releasing your
               identity without your consent.

     A cook, MARGO, approaches Paul to speak with him.   Paul nods:
     "Can't talk." Hands her the box of tomatoes.

                          PAUL
               Uh-huh.
     Paul heads to the back of the kitchen, searching for privacy.


     INT. PANTRY - SAME
21                                                              21
     Paul moves into the pantry, finds the farthest corner.

                         WENDY (O.S.)
               Well we've been contacted by a
               young woman conceived using your
               semen, and she's asked if you'd be
               open to having contact with her.

     Paul's speechless.
     OMITTED
19                                                              19
                                                              13.

     INT. TANYA'S HOUSE - BEDROOM - NIGHT
22                                                              22

     Paul and Tanya enjoy a hot, sweaty fuck.

     LATER THAT NIGHT
23                                                              23

     Paul gets dressed while Tanya lays on her messy bed.
                         TANYA
               You must of figured you'd get a
               call at some point.

                         PAUL
               Not really. I mean I was 19 when I
               did it. It was so long ago...I
               just figured no one actually used
               my stuff.

     Tanya moves closer to him, flirty.
                            TANYA
               Why?     I'd use it.

                         PAUL
                   (ignoring the innuendo)
               This is so weird. I mean, a part
               of me's really curious...

                         TANYA
               So what are you gonna do?
                         PAUL
               I don't know.

     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - DINING ROOM
24                                                              24

     Joni and Jules play scrabble at the table. Joni's cell
     rings. She grabs it off the counter and answers.
                            JONI
               Hello?


     EXT. PAUL'S HOUSE - BACK YARD - DAY
25                                                              25
     Paul anxiously paces his overgrown back-yard on his cell
     phone. He picks weeds as he talks. Conversation intercut.
                                                            14.

                    PAUL
          Hi, I'm looking for Joni Allgood.

                    JONI
          This is she...

                    PAUL
          Hi.  This is Paul...
              (clearing his throat)
          Uh, your donor...?

                        JONI
          Oh!   Hi...

Joni shoots up out of her chair and starts leaving the room
to get some privacy away from her mom.
                    PAUL
          Is this a good time to talk?

                    JONI
              (flustered)
          Yeah...

                    JULES
          Where are you going?     It's your
          turn.

Joni doesn't answer.     She just walks out to her backyard.

                    PAUL
          So...
              (doesn't know what to say)
          How are you?

                        JONI
          I'm good.      How are you?

                    PAUL
          I'm well, thanks.
Banal, awkward pause.     Paul jumps in to fill the void.

                    PAUL (CONT'D)
          So, Wendy at the Cryobank said you
          call--
Joni cuts in, nervous and businesslike.
                                                                15.

                          JONI
                Actually, my brother   asked if I'd
                call you because I'm   18 and he's
                only 15 which is too   young to call--
                anyway, he'd like to   meet you...if
                you want to...

                          PAUL
                    (thrown)
                Your brother?

                          JONI
                Yeah. Well, technically my half-
                brother. Each of my moms had a
                kid, you know, with your sperm...
                           PAUL
                No.   I didn't know.

                             JONI
                Oh.
                          PAUL
                Both of them?

                             JONI
                Yeah.

                          PAUL
                Like in two?
                           JONI
                Uh huh.   Like in gay.

                             PAUL
                Good deal.     I love lesbians.
     Paul cringes at his lameness.     Joni doesn't know what to say.


     OMITTED.
26                                                                26

     EXT. "WYSIWYG", PARKING LOT - NEXT DAY
27                                                                27

     Joni and Laser get out of the car and head to the restaurant
     to meet Paul. They're both clearly nervous.

                          JONI
                I just don't want you to have big
                expectations.
                                                               16.

                         LASER
               Will you quit saying that?    I don't
               have any expectations.
                         JONI
               Okay. I'm just saying he
               might be weird. I mean, he donated
               sperm...
                         LASER
               Well if he hadn't done it, you
               wouldn't be here. So respect, yo!


     INT. "WYSIWYG" - DAY
28                                                               28
     Paul sits alone at a table facing the entrance.   He nervously
     checks the door as customers enter.

     MINUTES LATER-
     Joni and Laser enter the restaurant.   They look nervous too.

     ANGLE ON PAUL

     He studies them for a beat, sees them looking around.
     Figures they must be "his kids." They look in his direction,
     spot him. He raises his hand, stands. They walk over.

     The moment is rife.    Paul holds out his hand to Joni.
                           PAUL
               Joni.    Hey. Nice to meet you.

                         JONI
               Nice to meet you too.
     Paul holds out a hand to Laser.

                         PAUL
               And Laser, right?
                            LASER
               Right.

                         PAUL
               Very cool name.

                            LASER
               Thanks.
                                                               17.

                         PAUL
               Thanks for making the trek all the
               way over here.
     No one knows what comes next.

                         PAUL (CONT'D)
               Cool, I got a table set up for us
               out here...

     Paul turns and leads them out to the outdoor dining area.

     EXT. OUTDOOR DINING AREA - MINUTES LATER
29                                                               29

     They all sit eating.    Paul can't help but study their faces.
                         PAUL
               Listen, feel free and ask me
               anything you want, okay?
                   (off their stares)
               Or we can just hang out. That's
               fine too. Whatever you guys want.

                            LASER/JONI
               Okay.
     Paul presses on, trying to break the ice.

                         PAUL
               Anything you want to ask me, Laser?
                         LASER
               I...uh...I didn't really have any
               specific questions...
                         PAUL
                   (helping him out)
               That's fine. I'd love to know
               about you guys. What about you,
               Joni? What are you up to?
                         JONI
               Uh, well, I just graduated high
               school. I'm starting college in
               the fall.
                            PAUL
               Oh yeah?     Congratulations.
                                                18.

                    LASER
          Joni's the brains in the family.
          She won a National Merit
          Scholarship.

                    PAUL
          Shut the front door!

                    LASER
          Yeah. And she got like an 800 on
          her Verbal SAT.
                    JONI
          Okay, Laser...

                    LASER
          What? I'm just saying you're
          really smart.

                    JONI
          No, I just work harder than you.
                    PAUL
          Don't stress it, Laze. School
          wasn't my thing either and I turned
          out okay.
                    LASER
              (re: his name)
          Laser.
                     PAUL
          I'm sorry. Laser.
              (beat)
          So tell me about you, Laser. What
          are you into?
Laser freezes.   So his sister jumps in.

                    JONI
          Laser's an amazing athlete.
                     PAUL
          Oh yeah?

                    LASER
          Did you play any sports in school?

                    PAUL
          I played a little basketball in
          junior high.
                                                        19.

                       LASER
          That's it?

                    PAUL
          Pretty much. The whole "team"
          thing got on my nerves, you know
          like, "Hey, let's go kick some ass,
          man!" What about you?
                    LASER
          I play some Soccer. Basketball.
          Baseball. You know, team sports.

Paul realizes he's put his foot in his mouth.

                    PAUL
          Hey, I wasn't bagging teams in
          general. Teams are great. I'm
          just weird like that.

                    LASER
          Yeah, I like teams.

We can tell Laser is growing frustrated at his inability to
connect with Paul. Joni jumps in.
                    JONI
          So this is your place?

                    PAUL
          Yeah, I've been working on it for a
          while. I also have this organic co-
          op farm down the road. We use a
          lot of the stuff we grow there for
          the restaurant.
                    JONI
              (excited)
          That's so cool.      I'm totally into
          local.
                    LASER
              (busting her)
          You are?

                    JONI
          Uh, yeah Laser! I've been like
          trying to get moms to buy local for
          forever.

Laser tries again to reconnect.
                                                               20.

                         LASER
               So, like, do you raise pigs and
               stuff?
                          PAUL
               No.  No pigs...
                   (beat)
               But it's a great spot. You guys
               should come check it out sometime.

                         JONI
               Yeah...Definitely...

     Excited, Joni turns to Laser.    He seems uninterested.

     EXT. WYSIWYG, PARKING LOT - DAY
30                                                               30

     The kids and Paul exit the restaurant. Paul walks to a
     classic BMW motorcycle. Lasers tries to hide his awe.
                         LASER
               Is that yours?

                           PAUL
               Yeah.    You like motorcycles?
                         LASER
               Yeah, but...our moms are kind of
               anti-motorcycle.
                         JONI
               And by "kind of" he means they'd
               kill us if we ever rode one.

                         PAUL
               That's too bad.   They're fun.

     Time to say goodbye. Again, no one knows the protocol here.
     After an awkward beat, Paul holds out his arms for hugs.
                         PAUL (CONT'D)
               Well it was great to meet you guys.

     He and Joni hug.
                         PAUL (CONT'D)
               I hope this was okay.

                         JONI
               Yeah...totally...thank you.

     Now Paul and Laser share a somewhat awkward man-hug.
                                                            21.

                         PAUL
               Really nice to meet you, Laser.

                            LASER
               Yeah.

     Joni gives a quick wave to Paul. She turns to go and Laser
     follows. Paul watches them walk away. He looks stirred up
     by the meeting.

     INT. JONI'S CAR - DAY
31                                                            31

     Joni and Laser head back home.

                         JONI
               I just never pictured him that way.
               I just...I don't know...He was so
               cool and interesting. I can't
               believe that was him...He was so
               nice, you know?...
                            LASER
               I guess...

                            JONI
               You guess?

                            LASER
               Yeah...
                         JONI
               God, Laser! You're the one that
               wanted to meet him so bad!

                            LASER
               I know.

                         JONI
               Well what did you think of him?
                         LASER
               I don't know. He seemed kind of
               into himself.

     OMITTED
30                                                            30
                                                                22.

     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - TV ROOM - LATER THAT NIGHT
33                                                                33

     Nic and Jules are cuddled up affectionately on the couch
     watching cable. They see Laser on his way out of the house.

                         JULES
               Hey bug, come here. We're watching
               "Locked Up Abroad: Uganda."
                           LASER
               I saw it.    It was gnarly.
                         NIC
               Where are you going?

                           LASER
               Clay's.

     Jules and Nic shoot each other a concerned look.

                         NIC
               Don't be back late, okay?

                           LASER
               I know.
                         JULES
               Can I have a hug before you go?

                           LASER
               Mom...
                         JULES
               Just a quick one.   Please!

                           LASER
               Hug her.    That's what she's there
               for.

     Laser leaves.   Nic hits mute on the TV, looks at Jules.
                         NIC
               Ugh. Maybe we should just sit him
               down and ask him already.

                           JULES
               What?    "Are you and Clay fucking?"

                         NIC
               "Exploring" is the word I'd use...
                                                23.

                    JULES
          And what if he is "exploring?"
          This is the age for that. Why
          should we care?

                     NIC
          We shouldn't...
              (then)
          I just don't understand why he's
          exploring with that loser.

                    JULES
          Look, we don't even know what the
          deal is. We're jumping to
          conclusions.
                    NIC
          I feel like he has so much
          potential and he's just wasting it.

Nic's comment hits a nerve in Jules.
                    JULES
          What are you trying to say?

                    NIC
          What do you mean, what am I trying
          to say?

                    JULES
          It feels like there's some subtext
          here.

                    NIC
          What are you talking about?
                    JULES
          I don't know: Like mother like son?
          Is that it? Both of us aimless,
          wandering in the darkness, "wasting
          our potential?"
Nic won't go there.

                    NIC
          Okay, honey, you're on a whole
          other tangent and I have no idea
          what you're talking about.

                    JULES
          Well, maybe it hasn't risen to the
          plane of consciousness for you yet.
                                                             24.

                           NIC
                Yeah.   Maybe not.

     Nic clicks the volume back on, freezing Jules out.

     INT.   PAUL'S RESTAURANT - AFTERNOON
34                                                             34

     Paul and Tanya sit at the bar, eating family-meal.

                          TANYA
                So what were they like?

                          PAUL
                Sweet. They were really good kids.
                The boy's kind of a sensitive jock
                and the girl's kind of innocent but
                whip-smart and super cute.

                          TANYA
                Sounds like you connected.
                          PAUL
                Yeah, we kinda did.

                          TANYA
                Where'd you leave it?

                          PAUL
                We didn't really leave it anywhere.
     Brooke, the sexy Wiccan volunteer, comes up to Paul bearing a
     basket of freshly-picked fruits.

                            BROOKE
                Hey Paul.
     Paul leans over the basket.

                          PAUL
                Whatcha got? Oh cool. First
                strawberries of the season.

                          BROOKE
                Don't they look awesome? I thought
                you should have the first taste.
     And with that, she smiles, hands him the basket and leaves.
                                                                   25.

                           TANYA
                     (mimicking Brooke)
                 "I thought you should have the
                 first taste...of my pussy."

     Paul can't help smiling at the nasty talk.

                            PAUL
                 Whoa...

     INT. NIC AND JULES BEDROOM - AFTERNOON
35                                                                   35

     Clay rummages through the top drawer of Jules' dresser.
     Laser stands behind him, uncomfortable.
                           LASER
                 Dude, I don't think they smoke pot.

                            CLAY
                 Hold up.
     Clay freezes. CLOSE ON a row of sex toys including a fancy
     pink, Japanese "all-in-one" dildo and a few DVD's.

                            CLAY (CONT'D)
                 Whoa!

     Clay turns on the dildo.      It starts to gyrate.

                           CLAY (CONT'D)
                 Yo, it's alive!

                           LASER
                 Dude, put it back!!
     Laughing, Clay throws the dildo back in the drawer.    Then he
     grabs one of the DVDs and spins back around.

                           CLAY
                 Dude, we're watching this.

     INT. LASER'S ROOM - DAY
36                                                                   36

     Laser and Clay sit on the bed.     They look at each other.
     Then Laser hits play.

     ON SCREEN

     We see a COP giving a young MAN a BLOW-JOB. Laser and Clay
     sit motionless, shocked, disgusted, riveted.
                                                             26.

                         CLAY
               Think the whole thing's like this?

                         LASER
               Want me to fast-forward?

     Clay doesn't answer.    They just keep watching.

     OMITTED
37                                                             37


     OMITTED
38                                                             38


     EXT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - DRIVEWAY - DAY
39                                                             39
     Jules pulls her truck into the driveway, almost running over
     Laser's bike.

     INT. LASER'S ROOM - DAY
40                                                             40

     Laser and Clay are still watching the porn...as Jules walks
     in the room.
                         JULES
               Laser, you left your bike out...

     Laser reflexively grabs for the remote. As he fumbles for
     it, Jules sees what they're watching. She looks mortified.

     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - KITCHEN - THAT EVENING
41                                                             41

     We enter a family conference already in progress.
     Nic and Jules act calm but are inwardly mortified that their
     15-year-old son found their porn.

                         NIC
               Laser, your mom and I accept you
               and love you unconditionally? You
               know that, right?

                            LASER
               Yeah.

                         NIC
               And you know you can be open with
               us about anything.
                                                             27.

                    LASER
          Yeah, I know.

Jules steels herself for a frank discussion.

                    JULES
          Laser, is there anything you want
          to talk about?
                       LASER
          Like what?
                       NIC
          Anything.     Anything on your mind.

Laser cracks his knuckles.
                    LASER
          Well there is something.

Nic and Jules share a look.      "Here we go."
                    LASER (CONT'D)
          It's more of a question, really.

                    NIC
          That's okay.

                    JULES
          We won't judge you.
Laser looks at his moms.       Nic and Jules brace themselves.

                    LASER
          Why do you guys watch gay man-porn?
Nic and Jules look at each other, thrown.

                    NIC
          Well, first I have to say we rarely
          watch that movie--
Jules touches Nic's arm.

                       JULES
          Honey...
                    NIC
          And secondly, I really don't
          appreciate you snooping around our
          room. Was that Clay's idea? I
          have to say again, I don't like
          him. He seems untended...!
                                                28.

                    JULES
          Honey, that's not what he asked--

                     NIC
              (snapping)
          Fine. Do you want to answer his
          question?!

                     JULES
          Well, sweetie, human sexuality is
          complicated. And sometimes,
          people's desires can be...counter-
          intuitive...
              (soldiering on)
          For instance, since women's sexual
          responsiveness is mostly internal,
          sometimes it's exciting for us to
          see sexual responsiveness more, you
          know...
              (beat)
          ...externalized.
Laser looks at them, still baffled.

                    JULES (CONT'D)
          Like with a penis.
                    LASER
          But like, wouldn't you rather watch
          two women doing it?
                    JULES
          You would think that. But in most
          of those movies, they've hired two
          straight women to pretend and the
          inauthenticity is just unbeara--
                    NIC
          Okay, that's enough! Laser, your
          mom and I have a sense there's some
          other stuff going on in your life
          and we just want to be let in.

                    LASER
          What do you mean?
                    JULES
          Are you having a relationship with
          someone?

                    NIC
          You could tell us, honey. We'd
          understand and support you.
                                                                 29.

     Laser looks confused.   How did they find out about Paul?

                         LASER
               I just met him once.

     Nic and Jules share a worried look.

                         NIC
               What do you mean once?

                         JULES
               Did he find you on-line?!

                           LASER
               What?!
                         NIC
               Who did you meet once?

                           LASER
               Paul!    I met him with Joni.
                         NIC
               Who's Paul?!

                         JULES
               Why was Joni there?!

                         LASER
               She set it up.
                         NIC
               Forget the set-up!   Who is Paul?!!

                         LASER
               Our sperm donor.
     Jules and Nic go white.

                         LASER (CONT'D)
               Wait, did you guys think I was
               gay?!


     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - LATER
42                                                                 42
     Joni has been pulled into the family conference. Nic and
     Jules are trying to remain as calm as possible. Nic slugs a
     gulp of wine.
                                                           30.

                          JULES
                Look, guys, we understand why you'd
                be curious about your biological
                father. That's totally natural.

                          NIC
                But why didn't you tell us?

                          JONI
                Because we knew you'd be upset.

                          NIC
                WE'RE NOT UPSET!!

     Jules calms her riled-up partner.
                          JULES
                Honey...
                    (to Joni; expressing her
                     upset more calmly)
                We just wish you'd have included us
                in your thinking. But what's done
                is done. You met him, and now you
                guys can move on--

                           JONI
                    (sheepish)
                Actually...
                    (beat)
                I want to see him again.
                 JULES                             LASER
     You do?!                         You do?!

                          JONI (CONT'D)
                    (to Laser)
                Yeah. I was gonna tell you.

                          NIC
                Whoa! Whoa! No. No way.
                    (regaining dominance)
                Nobody is seeing anyone until we
                meet him!

     Joni looks at Laser.   They knew this would happen.

     INT. NIC AND JULES' BATHROOM - NIGHT
43                                                           43

     Nic and Jules do a post-mortem as they floss.
                                                             31.

                         NIC
               Yeah, I get it. He's their
               biological father and all that crap
               but it still feels really shitty.
               Like we're not enough or something,
               you know?

                         JULES
               Of course I know. I don't want to
               time-share our kids with someone.
               Especially when it's Joni's last
               summer home. No way.

     When Jules leaves the room Nic pulls a clump of long, wet red
     hair out of the sink.
                         NIC
               Jesus, Jules! The plumber was just
               here!

     Nic throws the clump of hair in the trash.

     INT. NIC AND JULES BEDROOM - MOMENTS LATER
44                                                             44

                         NIC
                   (getting tactical)
               Look, we need to be smart about
               this. If we act like grubby
               bitches, we're just gonna make it
               worse.
                           JULES
               I know...

                         NIC
               Let's just kill him with kindness
               and put it to bed.

                          JULES
               I'm with you, honey.
                   (then)
               We're gonna get through this, okay?

     Nic smiles.   She loves when Jules shows confidence.
                         NIC
               I love you, chicken.

     The women bump fists.   They have a plan.
                         JULES
               I love you too, pony.
                                                                32.

     EXT. STREET - AFTERNOON
45                                                                45

     Paul rides slowly down the street, checking addresses. He
     pulls over and cuts his engine in front of the Allgood house.

     OMITTED
46                                                                46

     INT/EXT. ALLGOOD FRONT DOOR - AFTERNOON
47                                                                47

     Paul rings the bell. Waits. The door opens and Nic and
     Jules are there smiling with "kill him with kindness" faces.

                        NIC
               Paul! It is so great to meet you.
               I'm Nic. This is Jules.

     Paul shakes their hands.

                         PAUL
               Hi, great to meet you two.

                         JULES
               I hope the traffic wasn't too bad.
                         PAUL
               No, I've got my bike so...I just
               sort of weave through.

     Nic clocks the motorcycle, stifles the impulse to judge.
                          NIC
               Great.   Well, come on in.

     As they enter, Paul holds out a bottle of wine.
                         PAUL
               This is for you. I don't know if
               you guys like wine...
     Nic takes it.

                         NIC
               Are you kidding? We love it.
                   (checking the label)
               And a Petit Syrah. What a treat!
               Let me get some glasses.

     Nic leaves Paul by the stairs with Jules. Little silence.
     Jules steals a look at him, unable to contain her curiosity.
                                                             33.

                         PAUL
               Beautiful house.    How long you guys
               lived here?
                         JULES
               Almost ten years. Wait, has it
               been that long?
                   (rambling nervously)
               We moved right after Laser broke
               his leg, I remember that because we
               had a ramp for a while, so that
               would have been...ten, no, nine?
               No, ten years this fall.

     Paul nods, smiling at her nervousness.
                           PAUL
               Okay.

     Laser and Joni enter. Joni lights up when she sees Paul.
     Jules watches Paul hug her. Uncomfortable, she heads for
     THE KITCHEN --

     Jules finds Nic's pouring herself a sizable glass of wine.
                           JULES
               You okay?

                         NIC
                   (not okay)
               Yeah. Fine.

     Jules feels her inner co-dependent swelling in her chest.

                         JULES
               Go easy on the wine, hon.   It's day
               time.

                         NIC
               Okay. And same goes for the micro-
               managing...


     EXT. ALLGOOD PORCH - AFTERNOON
48                                                                48
     Everyone sits at the picnic table.

                         JULES
               I hope the food's okay. Joni told
               us you own a restaurant.
                                                        34.

                    PAUL
          The food's great. Can't go wrong
          with salmon and corn.
Nic finishes a glass of wine as Jules takes note.

                    NIC
          So Paul, did you always know you
          wanted to be in food-services
          industry?

Paul smiles at Nic, trying to disarm her.

                    PAUL
          Well, I always liked food.
                    NIC
          No, I was asking because I remember
          reading in your file, back when we
          were looking for, you know, sperm,
          anyway, you said you were studying
          international relations.

                    PAUL
          Oh yeah. Wow, that was a long time
          ago. Yeah, I was considering it,
          but then I dropped out of school.

                    JONI
          You dropped out of college?
                    PAUL
          Yeah, it wasn't my thing.

                      NIC
                (squinching)
          No?    Why's that?

                    PAUL
          It just seemed like a massive waste
          of money after a while. I mean, I
          wasn't "doing" anything. I was
          just sitting on my ass listening to
          people spout off ideas I could've
          just as easily learned reading a
          book.
Paul sees that his little rant may be alienating the moms.

                    PAUL (CONT'D)
          I'm not saying higher learning
          uniformly sucks. I mean, college
          is great for some people.
                    (MORE)
                                                35.
                     PAUL (CONT'D)
          Joni, I'm sure you're gonna love
          it. That's just me. I'm just
          weird that way.
              (beat)
          Which is probably why I ended up in
          the food-services industry.

                    LASER
          See what he did there, mom? You
          said "food-services industry," then
          he said "food-services industry..."
                    NIC
          Yeah, I got it, Laser. Thanks.
              (apropos of nothing)
          So, Paul, what about your social
          life?

                    PAUL
          My social life?
                    NIC
          You know, are you married,
          divorced, seeing anyone?

                     JONI
          Mom!

                     NIC
          What?   We're getting to know Paul.
                    PAUL
          No, never been married or divorced.
          I date a little, but I'm just kind
          of focused on my work right now.
                     NIC
          Oh.

Paul wants a break from the heat.
                    PAUL
          So, how'd you guys meet?

Jules smiles, embarrassed.   Nic jumps in.
                     NIC
          We met at UCLA. I was a resident
          in the ER and Jules had an
          emergency.
                    JULES
          My tongue went numb.
                                                         36.

                       PAUL
           Really?

THUD!   We turn to see Laser, pounding his head on the table.

                     JULES
           Laser, that's not nice.

                     LASER
           What's not nice is subjecting your
           kids to the same story 1000 times!
                     PAUL
               (ignoring Laser)
           What happened to your tongue?
                     JULES
           I don't know. I just lost all the
           feeling in my face and tongue and I
           thought I might gag and then, you
           know...
                       PAUL
           Choke?    Die?...

                     JULES
           Yeah...exactly...

                     NIC
           Well it was pretty clear to me she
           was just having an anxiety attack
           and she'd be fine.

                     PAUL
           So what'd you do for her?
                     NIC
           Gave her a Vallium. Tried to get
           her to relax, talk, move her tongue
           around.
                     LASER
           Mom, that's gross!

                     JULES
               (ignoring Laser, to Nic)
           Actually, she started teasing me
           and that really helped.

                     NIC
           I was trying to distract you.
                                                         37.

                    JULES
          I know. And it worked. You were
          really funny.
                    NIC
          You were really pretty.

Nic reaches over and caresses Jules' hand.   Joni rolls her
eyes, embarrassed.

                    JULES
          So that's it. My tongue started
          working again.

                    NIC
          And we've been glued at the hip
          ever since.

                    PAUL
          That's a great story.
                    JULES
              (beaming)
          We like it.

Laser and Joni share a look.
                    PAUL
          So Nic, I know you're a doctor.
          How `bout you, Jules? What do you
          do?
Jules never likes this question.

                    JULES
          Well, I, you know, I studied
          architecture in college...

                     PAUL
          Right...
                    JULES
          But I'm not an architect. I mean I
          was on my way to becoming one. But
          I quit before the kids were born.
                    PAUL
          Well, that happens...

                    JULES
          When they got a little older, I
          started a Balinese furniture import
          business...
                                                         38.

                      PAUL
          Right on.

                     JULES
          Yeah.   But that didn't work out.

                    PAUL
          Well, business aren't easy--
                    JULES
          Actually, I'm in the process of
          starting a new business.

                    PAUL
          Good for you. What kind?
                    JULES
          Landscape design...
              (before he can respond)
          But not like a gardener! I mean,
          yes, there's a gardening component
          to it, but the real work is to
          create unique, eco-friendly outdoor
          spaces that harmonize with the
          surrounding environment. Do you
          know what I mean?
                    PAUL
          Absolutely.

In Nic's mind, Jules is drowning in verbiage.   So she jumps
in to save her.

                    NIC
          Hey Paul, did Joni tell you about
          her graduation speech?
                    PAUL
          No, she didn't.

                    NIC
          It was incredible. So full of
          wisdom and hope...
              (turning to her Joni)
          Hon, go get it. I'm sure he'd love
          to hear it...
                    JONI
              (blushing)
          No, mom, I'm sure he wouldn't...
                                                       39.

                    NIC
          Sure he would.   Come on.   Go get
          it...
                    JONI
              (getting upset)
          No, it's okay...

                    NIC
          Sweetie, don't be embarrassed.

                    JONI
          I'm not embarrassed!   Jesus!     Give
          it a rest already!

This outburst stuns Nic into silence. Her daughter has never
spoken to her like this. Laser stands up.

                    LASER
          I'll get the ice-cream.
                    JONI
              (standing up)
          I'll help you.

Joni and Laser leave the room. Nic pours herself the last of
Paul's Petit Syrah. Jules smiles, covering her anxiety.

                    JULES
              (softly)
          Honey, that's your forth glass.
                    NIC
          Actually, it's my third.    But
          thanks for counting.
Paul turns to Jules, trying to revive the mood.

                    PAUL
          Hey, I was just thinking. You
          know, I bought this place last year
          and the backyard's a wreck. Would
          you be interested in working on it?

                    JULES
              (insecure)
          Oh, that's okay.

                    PAUL
          No, seriously. I don't have time
          to work on it myself.
                                                                40.

                          JULES
                Thank you. That's really sweet.
                Why don't you think about it.
                           PAUL
                Why?  I just did.
                    (then)
                I mean, if you're not up for it
                that's okay--

                          JULES
                    (jumping on it)
                No! I am!
                    (getting excited)
                I'm up for it!...
     Jules smiles at Nic: "Isn't this great?   My first client."
     Nic looks less than pleased.


     OMITTED.
49                                                                 49

     INT. HARDWARE STORE - DAY
50                                                                 50

     Nic pushes a cart piled high with gardening supplies. Jules
     grabs a couple BAGS of fertilizer, throws them on top.

                          NIC
                ...I'm just saying, the plan was to
                limit his involvement--
                          JULES
                You're unbelievable. You're all
                over me about getting clients, I
                finally get one and you're--
                          NIC
                He's not just a client, Jules.
                                      ,
                He's our sperm donor! Have you
                ever heard the phrase "Don't Shit
                Where You Eat?"

                          JULES
                Yes, and I think it's disgusting.
     The two separate, go down separate isles.     When they rejoin,
     Nic is contrite.

                          NIC
                I'm sorry. He just seemed sort
                of...self-satisfied to me.
                                                                41.

     Jules grabs the olive branch.

                         JULES
               Yeah, he was working the whole
               "alternative" thing pretty hard.

                         NIC
                   (mimicking)
               "I just need to get outside and
               `do' things, not sit on my ass and
               learn. But that's just me. I'm
               weird that way."

     They both laugh.    Nic's funny sometimes.

     EXT. PAUL'S HOUSE - ECHO PARK - DAY
51                                                                51

     Jules drives slowly up the hill looking for Paul's address.
     She sees the house and pulls in the driveway next to an old
     truck and a motorcycle.

     EXT. PAUL'S HOUSE - BACK YARD - DAY
52                                                                52

     Jules and Paul walk through Paul's backyard, evaluating.
                          JULES
               ...We could do a kind of a Secret
               Garden thing with trellises and
               topiary...
                   (clocking his face)
               ...or something more Asian,
               minimal, with a rock garden feel.
               It's up to you...
                         PAUL
               What do you think?

                         JULES
               Personally, I'm tired of minimal.
               I'm into more is more. Let's not
               try to tame the space. I think it
               would look great all lush and
               overgrown and fecund...
                           PAUL
               Fecund?

                         JULES
               I'm sorry, you know, fertile...
                                                             42.

                         PAUL
               No, I love that word. You just
               don't hear it that often.
                   (thinking)
               More is more. Yeah. Let's do that.

     Jules is staring at Paul.

                          PAUL (CONT'D)
               What?

                         JULES
               Sorry, I just keep seeing my kids
               in your expressions...

     Jules looks more intensely at Paul's face.
                         JULES (CONT'D)
               You and Laser have the same mouth.

                         PAUL
               You think so?

                          JULES
               Yeah.
     The observation strikes Paul. Suddenly, he's feeling a kind
     of fast-tracked intimacy with Jules he hadn't expected.


     EXT. BACKYARD - ALLGOOD HOUSE - EVENING
53                                                             53
     Jules and Laser play Ping-Pong as Nic gets home with Chinese
     take-out for the family dinner.

                         NIC
               What's the score?

                         JULES
               Pretty close.
     Laser cranks a forehand that whizzes past Jules.

                         LASER
               20-3...match point.
                         NIC
               So how'd it go today?

                          JULES
               Great.   We settled on a concept.
                                                              43.

                         NIC
               What is it?

                         JULES
               It's hard to explain. You have to
               kind of see the space to get it.

                          NIC
                   (to Laser)
               Laser, did you write Pup-pup a Get
               Well card?
                   (off his silence)
               Laser! What do I have to do?! I
               bought you a card. I left it on
               your desk. All you had to do was--
                         LASER
               Mom, settle! I will...

                         NIC
               Don't tell me to settle, mister.
               And if it's not in the mail by
               tomorrow morning, we're not going
               to the Dodger game Saturday.

                         LASER
               Whatever, I have other plans
               anyway.

                         NIC
               What other plans?
                   (off his silence)
               I'm asking you a quest--

                         LASER
               I said I'd do something with Paul!
     Laser serves a rocket, whizzing past a flailing Jules. He
     tosses the racquet on the table and leaves. Nic yells:

                         NIC
               You used to be so cute!


     EXT. ALLEY - DAY
54                                                               54
     We cut onto Paul and Laser, looking out at something.   Laser
     is holding a DIGITAL VIDEO CAMERA.

                         PAUL
               This may not be a good idea.
                                                              44.

                         CLAY (O.S.)
               Are you filming?!

     We cut to Clay on a skateboard on the ledge of a brick wall.
     He's preparing to ride the ledge, jump a dumpster and land
     his board on the ground.

                         PAUL
                   (to Laser)
               He's not gonna make it.
                   (calling to Clay)
               Clay, you're not gonna make it!

                         LASER
               I think he may be right, dude.
               Maybe this isn't such a good idea.
                         CLAY
               Will you quit being a man-gina and
               run the camera! I'm only doing
               this once so keep my shit in frame!
     Laser sighs, then holds up the camera. Paul looks at Laser,
     wondering why he puts up with this guy.

     VIDEO CAMERA'S POV: We watch as Clay psychs himself up   with
     an assortment of deep breaths and head-slaps. Finally,   he
     starts down the ledge. He starts his jump, catches air   and
     hits the edge of the dumpster and falls. We see him go   into
     the dumpster and land with a nauseating THUD. Paul and   Laser
     rush up and look over the edge.
                         PAUL/LASER
               ARE YOU OKAY?!

     There's Clay, his arm bent at a disturbing angle, in agony.
                         CLAY
               Did you get that?!

                         LASER
               Seriously, dude, are you okay?

                         CLAY
               I'm fucking fine! Fuck! Did you
               fucking get it?!

     EXT. STREET OUTSIDE CLAY'S HOUSE - LATER
55                                                              55

     Paul and Laser walk over to Paul's truck.
                                                          45.

                    PAUL
          Maybe next time we can hang out
          just you and me.
                    LASER
          Clay's cool. He's just gets a
          little amped sometimes.

                    PAUL
          That's not amped.    That's being a
          dick.
                    LASER
          He's not a dick, that's just his
          way.
                    PAUL
          Okay...I just didn't like the way
          he was talking to you.

                    LASER
              (defensive)
          Well, you don't know him.

                    PAUL
              (back-peddling)
          You're right...I don't...

                    LASER
          Hey, can I ask you a question?
                       PAUL
          Sure.

                    LASER
          Why'd you donate sperm?
                    PAUL
          Well, it's a lot more fun then
          donating blood.
Laser doesn't laugh.    Paul realizes he's gonna have to give a
"non-joke" answer.

                    PAUL (CONT'D)
          I don't know, I guess I thought,
          you know, if I can help somebody in
          need, somebody who wants a baby...

Laser's not really buying that.
                    LASER
          So you did it to help people?
                                                               46.

                         PAUL
               It was a long time ago...

                         LASER
               How much did you get paid?

                         PAUL
               Why do you want to know?
                         LASER
               I'm just curious.
                         PAUL
               I don't know, like 60 bucks a pop.

                            LASER
               That's it?

                         PAUL
               It was worth more back then.     You
               know. With inflation...
                   (off Laser's look)
               Hey, I'm glad I did it...

     Laser doesn't quite buy Paul's altruism.    He looks over at
     him, then away.

     INT. JONI'S ROOM - DAY
56                                                                  56

     Jai and Joni and Sasha play Scrabble.    Sasha checks out the
     photos of Paul on Joni's phone.

                         SASHA
               Hello? Donor Dad? Stone cold fox.
                         JAI
               Must you take everything beautiful
               and make it dirty?

                         SASHA
               I'm just saying. Spermster's a
               hottie. Is he single?

                         JONI
               Okay, first of all, ewww. Second,
               he's a really good person and I'd
               prefer it if you didn't taint him
               with your whore juice.

     Sasha hops up, energized by the banter.
                                                                47.

                          SASHA
               Fair enough, hairy muff. I'm outta
               here. You love birds can split my
               letters...

     Sasha splits and suddenly the room is thick with nervous
     tension.

                         JONI
               You want to keep playing?

                           JAI
               Sure.

     As Jai incorporates Sasha's tiles into his own, we see Joni
     gathering her nerve to make a move. Jai probably feels it
     but in his nervousness he can't look at Joni.

                         JAI (CONT'D)
               Sometimes I feel sorry for Sasha,
               you know...
                           JONI
               Yeah...

     Joni starts to move in, her face draws closer to Jai's, inch
     by inch.

     Somehow, deep down, Jai can sense her moving towards him
     which exhilarates and freaks the shit out of him at the same
     time. To the point where he lets slip...
                         JAI
               It's like she has to sexualize
               every experience, you know? It's
               just sad...
     That stops Joni in her tracks.

                         JONI
               Yeah, it is. It's really sad.
     Jai's sabotaged the mood and they both know it.


     INT. NIC AND JULES' BATHROOM - NIGHT
57                                                                57
     Jules walks in to find Nic in sexy satin man-PJ's, sitting at
     the rim of a RUNNING BATH. There are candles burning.

                           JULES
               Wow.    What's this?
                                                              48.

                       NIC
          Come here.     Sit down.

Jules takes a seat beside her.       Nic holds her hand.

                    NIC (CONT'D)
          I'm sorry I've been such a bitch
          lately. I know I'm not being my
          highest self.

                    JULES
          Yeah, well...

                    NIC
          You've been really patient with me.
          I just want you to know that hasn't
          gone unrecognized.

Nic gives her a long, sweet kiss.      Jules is warming up.

                       NIC (CONT'D)
          Get in.

CUT TO - JULES

In the tub, revelling in the warm bubbly water.      Nic is
sitting on the ledge, massaging her feet.

                    JULES
          Oh god, chicken, that's the spot.
                    NIC
          How's the water?

                      JULES
          Perfect.    You wanna come in?
                       NIC
          In a bit.     You enjoy it first.

Nic goes deeper with the massage.      Jules' eyes roll back.
                    NIC (CONT'D)
          Oh, I forgot the lavender salts.

Nic starts to get up.    Jules grabs her hand.
                    JULES
          No, don't stop...

                    NIC
          No, I meant to put `em in....
                                                               49.

     Nic gets up and sashays to the door.

                            NIC (CONT'D)
                  Don't move...

     Nic exits.    Jules sinks back, wishing Nic had stayed.

     CUT TO JULES - MINUTES LATER
58                                                               58

     Still waiting.    Getting impatient and upset.
                            JULES
                  Nic?!!

     No response.
     CUT TO THE KITCHEN --
54                                                               54

     Nic is on her cell with a patient, a glass of wine in her
     hand. Jules walks in wearing a bathrobe. Nic turns. Raises
     a finger and mouths: "Sorry..."

                             NIC
                  No, we're planning on being here
                  through mid-August so...
                      (beat)
                  No, I promise, I'm not going
                  anywhere.

     Jules' face drops; she turns and leaves.

     OMITTED.
59                                                               59

     INT./EXT.    PAUL'S HOUSE - DAY
60                                                               60

     Paul watches Jules work in his backyard.    Luis hauls shrubs.

     INT. PAUL'S HOUSE - KITCHEN - LATER
61                                                               61

     Paul and Jules stand at the kitchen table, looking over her
     sketch for the yard.
                            JULES
                  Look, I'm gonna go to the nursery
                  in the morning so we should
                  probably make sure you're signed
                  off on the Bougainvillea...

     Jules looks over at a pan on the kitchen counter.
                                                           50.

                    JULES (CONT'D)
          What's that?

                     PAUL
          Strawberry rhubarb pie.      Fresh from
          my garden.

Paul hands her a fork and she takes a big bite.     Her eyes
roll back in her head.

                       PAUL (CONT'D)
          Good, huh?

                       JULES
          Oh my god.     That is criminal.
                       PAUL
          Have more.

                    JULES
          No, please, just take it away...
                    PAUL
          You had one bite.

                    JULES
          I have another you may as well just
          tape it to my ass cause that's
          where it'll end up.

                    PAUL
          Hey now, don't go negative on your
          ass.

Jules blushes at all this talk of her ass.
                    JULES
          So...you're good with the plants?
              (off his silence)
          Look, we don't have to do that. We
          could do go in a totally different
          direction if you--

                    PAUL
          No, I'm just thinking. Hang on.
              (covers his eyes)
          Yeah, I'm good with the plants.

                    JULES
          Sorry. Sometimes I mistake silence
          for criticism.
                                                          51.

                    PAUL
          I wasn't criticizing you.

                     JULES
          No, I know...I just...
              (beat)
          Sometimes Nic can be a little
          critical, you know. She's a
          perfectionist.

                    PAUL
          That doesn't mean you have to be
          negative.

Jules looks away.    We HEAR a knock from the back.
                    LUIS (O.S.)
          Excuse me, Senora? Hello?

Jules turns, sees Luis standing at the glass door.
                       JULES
          What's up?

                       LUIS
          5 o'clock.
                       JULES
          Yeah.     Okay.

Jules wants Luis to leave her alone.    But he's not going.
                    LUIS
          Same time tomorrow?

                      JULES
          Yes!    Same time!

Luis leaves.   Jules turns back to Paul, laughs nervously.

                       JULES (CONT'D)
          Okay.     I'm gonna take off too...

                    PAUL
              (in Luis's accent)
          Same time tomorrow?
Jules pushes Paul, laughing.

                    JULES
          That's mean.

Paul hands her a Tupperware with some of the pie in it.
                                                              52.

                         PAUL
               Here, take this...

                           JULES
               No!

                         PAUL
               Just give it to the kids.
                          JULES
               Okay!   God, you're such a pusher!
     Jules grabs the pie and gives him a kiss on the mouth, almost
     as a mistake. Before they know it, they're making out.

     Jules snaps back, freaked.
                         JULES (CONT'D)
               Whoa. I'm sorry. That was...I
               don't know where that came from...
                         PAUL
                   (freaked himself)
               It's okay...

                          JULES
               Okay.   I'm gonna go now...

     Jules starts backing away, acting as if nothing happened.

                           PAUL
               Jules...?

                         JULES
                   (overcompensating)
               ...but I shall return!
     Jules bolts for the door, clutching her pie.   Paul watches
     her go, stunned by what just happened.

     INT. NIC AND JULES BEDROOM - NIGHT
62                                                                 62

     Nic's in bed reading a magazine. Jules gets in bed,
     paranoid. Nic puts her magazine down.
                         NIC
               So how'd it go with Paul?

                         JULES
                   (jumpy)
               What do you mean?
                                                               53.

                         NIC
               I don't know. Did you break
               ground? Did you dig in? I don't
               know the terms.

                         JULES
               No, we just talked...conceptually.

                         NIC
               Oh, so it was less of a "doing"
               day, huh? Was he okay with that?
                         JULES
               You know, maybe we should lay off
               the Paul digs a little.
                          NIC
               Okay.   You're right.

     Chastened, Nic looks back at her magazine.    Jules rolls over.
                         JULES
               And I also think we should start
               composting.

     OMITTED
63                                                               63


     EXT. URBAN FARM - ECHO PARK - DAY - MOS
64                                                               64
     Sweating and dirty, Joni and Paul pull radishes from the
     ground. They're in a zone together. Paul takes off his sun-
     hat and put it on Joni's head.

                         PAUL
               You got your mom's fair skin.     You
               didn't get my Mediterranean
               genes...

                           JONI
               Thanks...

     Joni's cell rings.    She looks.   Rolls her eyes.

                           JONI (CONT'D)
               Ugh.    Ignore.

     Joni hits the ignore button, puts her cell away.

                         PAUL
               Who's that?
                                                             54.

                         JONI
               My mom, Nic. She's making me
               insane.
                          PAUL
               Why?   What's she doing?

                         JONI
               She's treating me like I'm 12.
               It's like she doesn't want to admit
               I'm an adult.
                         PAUL
               She's your mom.     That's her job.

                         JONI
               What? To smother me to death?
               That's not her job.

                         PAUL
               Well, if you want things to be
               different, you've got to make that
               happen. That's your job.


     EXT. SUBURBAN STREET - MAGIC HOUR
65                                                             65
     Laser walks with Clay. Clay sports a homemade arm-cast for
     the skateboard mishap we witnessed earlier.

                         CLAY
               That jump was cake, dude!    I so
               could've made it.

                         LASER
               You were like 20 feet short, dude!
               There was no way.

                         CLAY
               Yeah, well if Paul wasn't there I
               could have landed it. That guy
               creeps me out.

                           LASER
               Whatever.
                         CLAY
               He's kind of a fag, dude. Tryin'
               to act all like your dad and shit.

     Laser doesn't know how to respond so he ignores the comment.
     A stray DOG comes up to them. Laser stops to pet it.
                                                           55.

                       LASER
          Hey buddy.     Good boy.

Laser sees the dog has no tags. He looks around for an
owner. The dog nuzzles Laser for affection.

                    LASER (CONT'D)
          I've seen this dog around.        I
          wonder if he's lost.

                    CLAY
          Let's pee on his head.

                       LASER
          What?
Clay unzips his fly.     It's difficult with the plaster cast.

                    LASER (CONT'D)
          Dude, don't do that.
                       CLAY
          Come on.     Hold him...

Clay yanks the dog by his scruff.
                    LASER
          Dude, Quit it!

                    CLAY
              (mocking)
          Duuude, quit it!

Suddenly, Laser gets it. His friend is the tool.     He grabs
the dog and smacks him to get him to run away.
                       LASER
          Go!   Run!    Get out of here!

The dog TAKES OFF.     Clay shoves Laser.
                    CLAY
          Why are you such a fag?!

Laser shoves Clay back hard.
                    LASER
          Why are you such a dick?!

Clay HITS Laser in the mouth. Laser touches his lip.     Sees
blood, and walks away. Friendship over.
                                                               56.

     EXT. URBAN FARM PARKING LOT - ECHO PARK - MAGIC HOUR
66                                                               66

     Paul and Joni walk to his motorcycle parked in the dirt lot
     behind them. Paul grabs his helmet off the bike, hands it to
     Joni.

                         PAUL
               Here, put this on.
     Joni takes the helmet and puts it on. Paul fastens the
     buckle for her. They get on the bike and take off down the
     hill.


     EXT. ECHO PARK TO THE WEST SIDE - MAGIC HOUR
67                                                               67
     Paul takes Joni home on his motorcycle via Sunset Boulevard.
     She holds Paul tightly.


     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - EVENING
68                                                               68
     The ladies sit in the living room watching TV.

                          JULES
               Relax. She'll get home when she
               gets home.

                         NIC
               Quit telling me to relax!
     They go back to watching TV.   After a beat, we HEAR a
     motorcycle pull up.

                         NIC (CONT'D)
               What the fuck...!

     EXT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - CONTINUOUS
69                                                               69

     Paul and Joni climb off the bike. Nic storms out of the
     house to intercept them by the sidewalk.

                         NIC
               Funny how someone conveniently
               forgot to tell me they were driving
               home on a motorcycle!

                         JONI
               Mom...
                                                57.

                    NIC
          You know how many people I've seen
          come into the hospital paralyzed
          from motorcycle accidents?!

                    PAUL
          I'm a very safe rider...

                    NIC
          That is so not the point I'm
          making! Joni knows this is
          something I'd never allow.

                    JONI
          Mom, I'm 18 years old! I won't
          even be living here in like next
          month!

                    NIC
          Yeah, well, you're living here now!
                    JONI
          Yeah, well why don't you get a jump
          on it and pretend like I'm not!

Joni storms off.   Nic glowers at Paul.
                    NIC
          She's never talked to me like that.

                    PAUL
              (trying to soften it)
          You know, Nic. If you eased up on
          the restrictions, maybe there'd be
          less tension...
                    NIC
              (marinated in sarcasm)
          Really? You think so, Paul?     Is
          that how it works?
Jules walks up to intervene.

                    JULES
          What's going on?
                    NIC
          Oh, nothing. Paul's just giving me
          child-rearing lessons.

                    PAUL
          I was just saying--
                                                               58.

                         NIC
               Listen, when you've been a parent
               for 18 years, come talk to me!
                         PAUL
               I was just making an observation.

                         NIC
               Yeah, and I need your observations
               like I need a dick in my ass!

     Nic storms off.   Jules follows.   Paul watches, shell shocked.


     OMITTED
70                                                                70

     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - JONI'S BEDROOM - LATER THAT NIGHT
71                                                                71

     Nic knocks on the door.   Get's no response.
                         NIC
               Joni?
                   (silence)
               I was just upset. You know how I
               feel about motorcycles.
     Joni opens the door.

                         JONI
                   (patronizing)
               I know how you feel about them.
               But I'm an adult now and you have
               to respect that. Goodnight.

     Joni closes the door on her.

     OMITTED
72                                                                72

     INT. PAUL'S HOUSE - DAY
73                                                                73

     From his house, Paul watches Jules working on her knees in
     the garden.
     CLOSE ON Jules' thong peaking out of her jeans. Luis walks
     across Paul's field of vision, interrupting his reverie.


     INT. PAUL'S HOUSE - LATER
74                                                                74

     Jules steps tentatively into Paul's house.
                                                            59.

                      JULES
          Paul?

Jules walks further into the house. She looks anxious.      Paul
opens his office door and sees Jules in the hall.

                      PAUL
          Hey.    What's up?
                    JULES
          Look, I'm sorry about last night.
          I'm really embarrassed.

                      PAUL
          Don't be.    She's the one who wigged
          out.
                    JULES
          I know, she's just going through a
          lot of stuff right now...
                    PAUL
          Jules, it's okay.      You don't have
          to defend her.

They stare at each other, unsure how to act.
                    JULES
          And look, I just want you to know,
          about the other day, the kiss,
          that's not something I...do.
                    PAUL
          Yeah, I sensed that.

She takes a step toward him, feverish.
                    JULES
          I just wanted to clear the air.

They stare at each other.      It's like watching two magnets.
                    PAUL
          The air is clear.

Jules grabs Paul and starts smothering him with kisses.
It takes a second for Paul to get his bearings, but when he
does, he starts kissing her back with equal fervor, pushing
her up against the wall, wedging his hand between her legs.
                    JULES
          Paul, I can't!
                                                              60.

                           PAUL
                 You don't want to?!

                           JULES
                 No, I do! It's just...
                     (urgent whisper)
                 I have a guy outside!

     Overcome with lust, Jules wraps her legs around his waist and
     Paul walks her into...


     HIS BEDROOM
75                                                              75

     Quick cuts of their awkward ravenous gropings. Somewhere
     between slapstick and animal. He pulls her hair back hard.
     She loves it. She pulls his hair back harder. He yelps.
     She pulls down his underwear. Her eyes widen. It's been
     decades since she's seen a hard cock in the flesh.

                               JULES
                 Oh.   Well.     Hel-lo!

     Cut to them fucking. It's gawky and passionate.    Somewhere
     in the middle of it, Jules starts laughing.
                               PAUL
                 What?

                               JULES
                 Nothing.
     Paul flips her on her hands and knees and they go at it some
     more.

     She keeps laughing. Paul goes harder to make her stop. The
     paces grows quicker. They're getting closer. And then...

                            LUIS (O.S.)
                 Hello?   Excuse me, Senora Allgood?!
     They stop mid-thrust.

                           JULES
                 You gotta be fucking kidding me!
     She dislodges from Paul and starts dressing furiously.


     INT./EXT.   PAUL'S HOUSE - DAY
76                                                              76
     Jules runs out to meet Luis, waiting patiently at the door.
                                                                    61.

                            JULES
               What's up?

                         LUIS
               Where do you want the stones?

                         JULES
                   (catching her breath)
               The stones? Over by the fence.

     Luis stares at his employer. She looks totally disheveled.
     Jules starts feeling her hair, smoothing it into shape.

                          JULES (CONT'D)
                   (defensive)
               What? I was using the bathroom.
                   (then)
               Do you need to use the bathroom?

     Luis stares at her feet.       She looks down.   She's barefoot.

     EXT. PUBLIC PARK - DAY
77                                                                      77

     Paul and Laser shoot hoop. There's a tense-ness to their
     patter. Laser takes the ball and steps to the top of the key
     and shoots. Drains it.

                            LASER
               That's H.
                            PAUL
               I know.

     Laser steps up to left side of the basket, calls his shot.
                            LASER
               Lay-up.

                         PAUL
               Hey, don't take it easy on me cause
               you're winning--

     Laser does a trick behind the back lay-up.        Nails it.   Then
     tosses the ball to Paul.
                         PAUL (CONT'D)
               Nobody likes a show-off.

                         LASER
               Hey, can I ask you a question?
                                                             62.

                          PAUL
               Oh god.   Okay. Hit me.

                         LASER
               When you die do you want to be
               buried or cremated?

                         PAUL
               That's your question?

                         LASER
               I want to be cremated.

                         PAUL
               I think I'd rather be buried.
                         LASER
               Why? That's just taking up more
               space in the earth.

                         PAUL
               I don't know, something about the
               idea of being burned into this
               chalky powder and sprinkled--

                         LASER
               What do you care?   You won't even
               be conscious.

                         PAUL
               That's true. I guess I just want
               to be in a place where people can
               visit me.

                         LASER
                   (growing animated)
               But why?! You'll be dead! You
               won't even know they're there!


     INT. WYSIWYG - RESTAURANT - NIGHT
78                                                             78
     Joni and Sasha are at a table eating dinner. Tanya has
     temporarily joined them. Sasha checks out Tanya's oversized
     African bead necklace. Joni watches Paul charm customers.
                         SASHA
               God, I love your necklace!   Where'd
               you get it?

                         TANYA
               I don't know, some flea market--
                                                           63.

                       SASHA
          In Africa?

                    TANYA
          No, more like Pasadena.

                    SASHA
          Well, it's really awesome.
Paul saunters up to the table and stands behind Sasha.   He
mindlessly places his hand on Sasha's shoulder.
                    PAUL
          Sorry guys, I need to steal Tanya
          back now.
Sasha clocks Paul's hand. She carefully and without looking
back places her hand on top of his.

                    SASHA
          That's okay, Paul.
                    TANYA
              (getting up)
          Well ladies, it was fun talking
          with you.
                       SASHA/JONI
          You too.

Paul pulls his hand away from Sasha's and walks off with
Tanya. Sasha turns to Joni.

                    SASHA
          Okay, I'm sorry but your donor
          daddy is giving me the sex vibe.
                    JONI
          No he's not. He wouldn't do that.

                      SASHA
          Why not?    He's not my dad.

                    JONI
          God Sasha, that's totally gross!
          Not everybody wants to have sex
          with you, okay? Especially when
          you act like a slut.

                       SASHA
          Fuck you.
                                                               64.

                          JONI
               Well it makes you seem insecure and
               desperate.
                         SASHA
               I'm not insecure and desperate!
               I'm just a normal sexual person!
               And maybe you'd get that if you
               weren't so uptight!

                           JONI
               Fuck you.    I'm not uptight!


     INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
79                                                               79
     Nic and Jules dine with their friends, JOEL and STELLA.
     Nic's drinking like a fish.

                         STELLA
               Oh my god, these heirloom tomatoes
               are insane.

                         JULES
               Joni brought some home from Paul's
               garden the other day. They were
               huge!

     Nic tightens at the mention of Paul.

                         JOEL
               So, the kids have been spending
               time with him?

                         NIC
               Oh, yeah, they're spending all
               kinds of quality time together.

                         STELLA
                   (senses the sarcasm)
               Well, it's great they like him so
               much.   You know, you hear these
               stories about kids meeting their
               donors and the guys end up being
               nothing like they were on paper.
                         NIC
               No, everyone's getting along
               famously. Apparently Paul can do
               no wrong...
     Nic grabs a passing waiter by the arm.
                                                         65.

                    NIC (CONT'D)
          Can we get another bottle of the
          Seavey Cabernet?
Jules gives Nic a look.   Joel and Stella feel the tension
between them.

                    STELLA
          Hey, have you guys tried those Ašai
          fruit packs?

                    JULES
          No, but they're pushing them like
          crack at Whole Foods.

                      STELLA
          I know.    Joel's addicted.

                    JOEL
          What I do is I throw one in the
          blender with some bananas, frozen
          strawberries and hemp milk and I'll
          tell you, it's sensational.

Nic slaps her forehead.
                    NIC
          Oh, just fucking kill me...

Everyone stiffens.   Jules is embarrassed.
                      JULES
          Honey...

                    NIC
          I'm sorry guys, but I just can't,
          with the fucking hemp milk and the
          organic farming and heirloom
          tomatoes.
              (mocking-voice)
          "Oh no, don't throw that in the
          trash, no man, you gotta throw that
          into the composting bin so the
          fucking worms can shit all over it
          and turn it into glorious multch
          and we can all feel better about
          ourselves." God! What a bunch of
          bullshit!

Nic takes a big swallow from her glass.   Jules windshield
wipes Nic's forearm.
                                                                66.

                         JULES
                   (sotto)
               How about some green tea, honey...
     Nic slams her glass on the table.   Explodes.

                         NIC
               You know what, Jules?! I like my
               wine! Okay? So fucking sue me!
               And fyi, red wine has a chemical
               called Resveratrol in it, which has
               been proven to significantly extend
               human lifespan!

                         JULES
               Yeah, if you drink a thousand
               bottles a day!

                            NIC
               Fuck you.
     Nic storms off.   Jules turns to Joel and Stella, ashen.

                            JULES
               I'm sorry.

     INT. RESTAURANT BAR - MINUTES LATER
80                                                                80

     Jules walks over to the bar. Nic is sitting in the corner.
                         JULES
               What the hell is going on with you?

                         NIC
               This whole Paul thing is driving me
               crazy! I feel like he's taking
               over my family.

     Jules tries to bring it down.   She yells in hushed tones.
                         JULES
               No. He's not!

                         NIC
                   (nerves fraying)
               Okay! Okay. I'm sorry.      I'm just
               exhausted...

                         JULES
               Maybe you need to take some time
               off and recharge.
                                                  67.

                    NIC
              (self-pitying)
          Sure, and who's gonna pay for that?
Jules looks pissed off, and hurt.

                    NIC (CONT'D)
          Look, I'm sorry, I just feel like
          I'm carrying the whole load here.

                    JULES
          Because that's the way you like it!
          That's the way you keep control!

This is Jules' break-point.
                    NIC
          What are you talking about?

                    JULES
          Oh come on! You hated it when I
          worked! You wanted me at home,
          taking care of the kids. You
          wanted a wife!

                    NIC
          That is just not true!

                    JULES
          You didn't trust any of those
          nannies! And you sure as hell
          didn't back my career!

                    NIC
          What are you talking about? I just
          helped you start another business!
                    JULES
          Yeah, so you can feel better about
          yourself!
                    NIC
          No, so you can feel better about
          yourself!

                    JULES
          Are you even attracted to me
          anymore?

The BARTENDER holds out the bottle of Cabernet.
                    BARTENDER
          Do you still want this?
                                                             68.

                         NIC
               No. Just the check please.

     JULES AND PAUL
81                                                                81

     Fucking again in his bedroom. Jules writhes beneath him, her
     eyes closed.   Paul seems to be in some kind of zone. He
     stares at her, enthralled.

                                                        CUT TO:

     POST - COITUS
82                                                                82

     Jules and Paul lie naked in the bed. Jules slithers around
     the covers, stoned on post-coital endorphins.

                          JULES
               God, I feel so drugular right now.
                   (sitting up quickly)
               I really want a cigarette! Do you
               have any? I haven't had a
               cigarette since Laser was born. Do
               you smoke?
                         PAUL
               Sometimes. But I don't have any
               here. Want me to run to the store?

                         JULES
                   (bouncing off the walls)
               Yeah. Wait, no. Don't.     Sorry.

     Jules pops up on her knees, getting in his face.
                         JULES (CONT'D)
               Do you think I'm just like some sad-
               sack middle-aged lesbian?

                         PAUL
               God, that's it. I was trying to
               figure out how to describe you to
               my friends. Thank you.

     Jules punches his arm, mock hurt. They start rough-housing.
     Then kissing. Then the phone rings.

                         JULES
               You want to get that?
                         PAUL
               No. I want to get this...
                                                               69.

     Paul grabs a handful of Jules' ass. Jules throws her leg
     over Paul and climbs up for another round. Suddenly, Joni's
     voice echoes through the machine.
                         JONI (ON MACHINE)
               Hi Paul. It's Joni. I just wanted
               to apologize for my friend, Sasha.
               I was really embarrassed when she
               put her hand on your--

     Paul grabs the receiver.
                            PAUL
               Hey, Joni.     I'm here...

     Jules visibly recoils.
                         PAUL (CONT'D)
               Listen, don't worry about your
               friend.
     Jules pales. She mouths: "What are you doing?!"    Paul
     gesticulates: "I'm sorry!"

                         PAUL (CONT'D)
               No. Honestly. I didn't even
               notice...

     Jules throws on her clothes and starts to leave.

                            PAUL (CONT'D)
               Hey, Joni?     Can you hold on a
               second?

     Paul grabs Jules' wrist and mouths "wait!"   Jules rips her
     arm free and walks out.

     MOMENTS LATER - JULES
83                                                                 83

     walks outside and is stunned to find Luis already back from
     Home Depot, sneezing and wiping his nose.

                         JULES
               Did you go to Home Depot?
                          LUIS
               Yeah.   I just got back.

                         JULES
               That was fast!
                                                           70.

                    LUIS
          Yeah, no lines.

His look of confusion trips off her paranoia.      She's
convinced he knows everything.

                    JULES
          What's that look?
                       LUIS
          What look?
                    JULES
          The look you're giving me right
          now!
                    LUIS
          That's no look.     That just my face.

                    JULES
          Look, I'm not gonna play this game
          with you! You need to keep your
          judgements to yourself!

                    LUIS
          Senora, I didn't give no looks!
                    JULES
          I don't ask you why you keep
          blowing your nose constantly! I
          mean, if you have a drug problem
          that's your business...

                    LUIS
          I don't have no drug problem!
          I have the allergies!
                    JULES
          Then why are you a gardener?!

Luis stares at Jules, innocent.
                    LUIS
          Cause I love the flowers.

                    JULES
          Look, this isn't gonna work. I'll
          pay you through the end of the day
          and then we're done.

Jules walks past a totally confused Luis.
                                                                   71.

     INT. NIC AND JULES BEDROOM - NIGHT
84                                                                   84

     Jules lies on her side. Nic shuffles to get to close to her.
     Jules moves away, still pissed at her. Nic realizes she
     needs to make amends.


     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - KITCHEN - NEXT MORNING
85                                                                   85
     The family sits in silence, having breakfast.     Nic looks
     around the table, feeling like a pariah.
                         NIC
               Look, I know you've all been
               enjoying your time with Paul. And
               I know I haven't been as open to
               him as everyone else and this has
               caused some...friction...between
               us. But I'd like to try and change
               that...
     Everyone keeps eating, uncommitted.   "And...?"

                         NIC (CONT'D)
               So I was thinking. Maybe it would
               be nice if we all had dinner at his
               house sometime. That way, I could
               get to know him a little better,
               and I could see all the good work
               mom's been doing with his backyard.
     Nic looks at Jules and smiles. Everyone nods.     They
     recognize this is a big step for Nic.


     OMITTED
86                                                                   86

     EXT. PAUL'S HOUSE - BACKYARD - DAY
88                                                                   88

     Paul walks out to check on Jules. She's sweating her ass
     off, shlepping stacks of heavy mulch across the yard.

                         PAUL
               How's it going?
                         JULES
               Okay...
                                                                72.

                         PAUL
               Here, let me help.

     Paul takes some of her load and together they transport the
     sod to the other side of the yard. Neither know what to say.

     Paul stares at her, waiting for her lead.

                         JULES
               We can't be doing this...

                           PAUL
               I know...

                         JULES
               I'm married...
                         PAUL
               ...and the kids...

                         JULES
               Yeah, and I love Nic.

                           PAUL
               I know...
     They stare at each other and we cut to...


     INT. PAUL'S BEDROOM - LATER
89                                                                89
     Paul and Jules lie in bed. Jules looks nauseated.   Paul
     offers her a pack of smokes.

                         PAUL
               I got you some cigarettes.
                         JULES
                   (ignoring him)
               Jesus, what's wrong with me? I
               shouldn't have fired Luis like
               that. That was totally wrong...

                         PAUL
               Come on. Don't be so hard on
               yourself. Things get messy
               sometimes...

                         JULES
               That wasn't messy. That was fucked
               up. I'm totally fucked up...
                                                              73.

                         PAUL
               I think I'm really falling for you.

                         JULES
               Paul, don't...


     INT. PAUL'S BATHROOM - LATER
90                                                                 90
     Jules takes a shower, washing off the evidence.   She looks
     nauseated by her lack of willpower.

     INT. WYSIWYG - LATER
87                                                                 87

     Tanya walks over to Paul who's on his computer. She flops on
     the couch next to him. He doesn't look up.

                         TANYA
               Pretty good night. That table had
               like 5 bottles of wine.
                           PAUL
               Wow.    Yeah. Good night.

                         TANYA
               Joni's pretty. She's got some of
               your genes.

                         PAUL
               I think she looks more like her mom
               actually. But thank you.

                         TANYA
               It's cute seeing you in dad mode.
                            PAUL
               Yeah?

                         TANYA
               Yeah.
                   (lowering voice)
               It makes me want to fuck you.

                         PAUL
                   (uncomfortable)
               Oh yeah?...

                            TANYA
               Yeah...
     Tanya moves imperceptibly closer.
                                                                 74.

                         TANYA (CONT'D)
               I've been missing our sleep-overs.

     Paul finally stops what he's doing.

                         PAUL
               Yeah, it's been a while.

                         TANYA
               You want to meet up later?

     Paul hesitates.   He doesn't know how to say no.

                         PAUL
               Tanya, you're so sexy and
               beautiful, but I don't think we
               should do that anymore.

     Tanya's face drops.

                         TANYA
               What happened?

                         PAUL
               You know, our thing is really fun
               and easy, but...I don't want to be
               50 and still "hanging out." You
               know? If I really want a family
               then I have to stop getting in
               these situations that don't go
               anywhere.
     Paul just looks at her.   Tanya gets it.

                           TANYA
                     (welling up)
               Oh.

     Paul knows enough to say nothing.      Tanya gets up and walks
     off.
                           TANYA (CONT'D)
               Fuck you.

     Paul sits there, feeling like an asshole.

     EXT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - MAGIC HOUR
91                                                                    91

     The family packs into the Volvo to head to Paul's.
                                                              75.

     INT. PAUL'S HOUSE - KITCHEN - MAGIC HOUR
92                                                               92

     Paul gets dinner ready with Joni and Laser as his sous-chefs.
     Both kids seem really jazzed to be cooking with him.

     IN THE BACKYARD -EVENING

     Jules tours Nic around the backyard, looking a little freaked
     out as she shows her the work she's been doing.

                         JULES
               I'm gonna do some planting over
               there so it won't look so bare...

                         NIC
               It looks great, honey. Very
               indigenous. I'm so proud of you.

     Nic kisses Jules spontaneously. Jules looks nauseous again.
     They head back up the stairs, toward Paul's house.
                         NIC (CONT'D)
               Hey, so how's that guy Luis working
               out?

                         JULES
               Oh, I had to fire him.

                         NIC
                   (surprised)
               Really?!
                         JULES
               Yeah, he had a drug problem.

                          NIC
               Whoa.   What kind of drugs?

                         JULES
               Blow, I think...

     INT. PAUL'S HOUSE - DINING ROOM - LATER
93                                                               93

     Nic flips through Paul's album collection, including Joni
     Mitchell's Blue.

     INT. PAUL'S HOUSE - DINING ROOM - NIGHT
94                                                               94

     Everyone digs into the meal, enjoying themselves.   Especially
     Nic, who's committed to redeeming herself.
                                                        76.

                    PAUL
          Hey Nic, I think you're gonna love
          this `98 Screaming Eagle.
                    NIC
          You know what, I think I'm gonna
          stick with water tonight. But
          thank you so much.
The Allgoods look at Nic: this is a first.

                    NIC (CONT'D)
          God, Paul, this steak is delicious.
          What's the seasoning?

                    PAUL
          I just mist it with a little
          truffle oil.

Nic looks at Jules and smiles in full overcompensation mode.
                    NIC
          What a good idea. We should try
          that. Right, honey?

                    JULES
              (taken aback by Nic's
               cheerfulness)
          Mmm-hmmm.

                    NIC
          And it's done to perfection.

                    PAUL
          So it's not too rare?
                    NIC
          No, it's perfect. Juicy. Tender.
          Exactly what rare's supposed to be.

                    PAUL
          Good. A lot of people in the
          restaurant order a steak rare and
          they freak out at the slightest
          sight of red.
                    NIC
          Ugh, isn't that annoying? That
          happens to me all the time when I'm
          grilling.
                                                         77.

                    PAUL
          Don't people know that rare means
          red?
                     NIC
          Right?!   It means bloody!

                    PAUL
          Exactly! They should see what rare
          looks like in Argentina. The cow's
          practically still mooing.
Laser chuckles at Paul's joke, then reigns it in.   Joni tries
to insert herself in the conversation.

                    JONI
          I really want to go to Argentina.
          Buenos Aires is supposed to be--

                    NIC
              (interrupting)
          ...So Paul, I was checking out your
          album collection over there. Quite
          the eclectic mix...

                      PAUL
          Thanks...

                    NIC
          You don't meet too many straight
          guys who love Joni Mitchell.
Joni glares at Nic: stop being such a Paul hog.

                    PAUL
          Oh yeah, you a Joni Mitchell fan?
                     NIC
              (smug)
          Not really. We just named our
          daughter after her.
                    PAUL
          Cool. Right on...

                    NIC
          What's your favorite Joni album?

                    PAUL
          I think I have to go with "Blue."
Nic raises her hand in a testify.
                                                        78.

                     PAUL (CONT'D)
          Yeah?   You too?

They high-five across the table.

                    NIC
          Oh God, I probably spent half of
          high school in my room crying to
          that album. That record kills me.

                    PAUL
          I know, it never lets up, you got
          "River," "California..."

                    NIC
          "A Case of You..."
                    PAUL
          "All I Want.."

                     NIC
          Mmm!!

Nic pulls her hands to her chest, shuts her eyes...and starts
to sing.
                    NIC (CONT'D)
          I am on a lonely road and I am
          traveling traveling, traveling,
          traveling/Looking for something,
          what can it be/Oh I hate you some,
          I hate you some/I love you some Oh
          I love you/when I forget about
          me...

Jules, Paul and the kids watch, open-mouthed as Nic soldiers
on, skipping ahead to another verse.

                    NIC (CONT'D)
          I want to talk to you/I want to
          shampoo you/I want to renew you
          again and again/Applause, applause/
          Life is our cause/When I think of
          your kisses/My mind see-saws...

Nic takes a breath. Just as Paul's about to say something,
Nic resumes her unfortunate solo.

                    NIC (CONT'D)
          Do you see/do you see/do you see
          how you hu-urt me baby/so I hurt
          you too/then we both get/soo-ooo-
          ooo blue...
                                                           79.

Nic stops, eyes still closed. She's connected to a part of
herself she rarely lets herself visit. The moment is
punctured by her smart-ass 15-year-old son.
                    LASER
          Don't quit your day job, mom.

                    PAUL
          Hey. It's hard enough to open your
          heart in this world. Don't make it
          harder.
                    LASER
          You're right.
              (to Nic; contrite)
          I'm sorry, mom.
Nic looks at Paul.    Stunned.   Then looks at Jules and points
to Paul.

                    NIC
          I like this guy.

Paul looks at Joni.

                    PAUL
          You didn't tell me you were named
          after Joni M.

                    JONI
          It's just so dorky. I don't really
          like to bring it up.

                    PAUL
          I think it's cool.
                    NIC
              (getting up)
          Hey Paul. Where's your bathroom?

                    PAUL
          Just around there.

On her way to the loo, Nic turns back to Paul.

                    NIC
          You know what? I think I will try
          some of that Screaming Eagle.
                                                                 80.

     INT. PAUL'S BATHROOM - CONTINUOUS
95                                                                 95

     Nic washes her hands at the sink. Something catches her eye.
     She lifts Paul's hairbrush from the shelf in front of her and
     examines it. She reaches into the bristles and pulls out...

     A few strands of long red hair.

     Nic pales.

     CUT TO
     Nic on her knees in Paul's shower, pulling a clump of tell-
     tale red hair from the drain.

     CUT TO
     Nic skulks out of the bathroom.   She looks out and b-lines
     for the bedroom.

     CUT TO
     Nic pulling pillows off Paul's bed.   Her look tells us she's
     found hair here as well.

     THEN WE CUT TO
     Nic sitting back down at the table. She looks drained.
     Nobody notices. The sound drops out.

     NIC'S POV:
     Paul and Jules talking comfortably.

     Joni and Laser chiming in, smiling, one big happy family.
     REVERSE ONTO NIC:

     Totally disconnected. Shell-shocked. She wants to scream
     but it feels like she's trapped in cement. Things slow way
     down...


     OMITTED
96                                                                 96

     INT. NIC AND JULES' BATHROOM - THAT NIGHT
97                                                                 97
     Nic and Jules perform their nightly ablutions.   Jules is
     sonic-caring her teeth.
                                                             81.

                         JULES
                   (through the sonic buzz)
               Well, you and Paul seemed to get on
               like gang-busters...

                         NIC
               You're sleeping with him, aren't
               you.
                         JULES
                   (freaked)
               What?

     Nic turns to her, eyes red with anger.

                         NIC
               Just be honest with me. Don't make
               me feel crazier than I feel right
               now!

                         JULES
               Where is this coming from?!

                         NIC
               I found your hair in his drain!
                         JULES
                   (scrambling)
               What? I was working.    I got dirty
               so I took a shower.
                          NIC
               Oh yeah?   You take a nap, too?

     Jules pauses a second too long.   The jig is up.

     INT. NIC AND JULES' BEDROOM - MINUTES LATER
98                                                             98

     The truth has come out.   Nic is so angry she's calm.
                         NIC
               Are you in love with him?!

                          JULES
               No!
                         NIC
               What, are you straight now?!

                        JULES
               No. It has nothing to do with
               that!
                        (MORE)
                                                               82.
                          JULES (CONT'D)
                   (beat)
               I've just felt so cut off from you
               lately...
                         NIC
               Oh, right, so it's my fault!

                         JULES
               No! Who said anything about fault?
               Just listen to me!

                         NIC
               I'm listening!   What?!

                         JULES
               I just needed...
                          NIC
               What?   To be fucked?

                         JULES
               No, appreciated!

                         NIC
               It's always what I'm not doing for
               you, isn't it? Well here's what I
               don't to you. I don't work out my
               issues by fucking other people!

     Nic starts heading for the door.    Jules follows.
                         JULES
               He's not just "other people!"

                         NIC
               No, you had to go fuck our sperm
               donor! You couldn't have picked a
               more painful way to hurt me...

                         JULES
               Where are you going?!
                         NIC
               I need water! My mouth is dry!

     Nic opens the door. There's Joni and Laser, looking
     devastated. They've been listening to the whole thing.


     INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - DAWN
99                                                               99
     Jules wakes up looking crusty from a rough night on the
     couch. She looks like she hasn't slept at all.
                                                               83.

      INT. LASER'S ROOM - DAWN
100                                                             100

      Jules enters and walks over to her sleeping son.   She gently
      nudges him awake.

                             JULES
                Hey Laser.     Honey?

      Laser turns over, semi-conscious.

                             LASER
                What?

      She sits down on his bed.

                          JULES
                Listen, I know you and Joni heard
                what's going on. I just want you
                to know that what happened with
                Paul and me is over. There's
                nothing going on now.
                             LASER
                Okay.

                           JULES
                I know you might need some time to
                process your feelings around this,
                but I just want you to know that
                I'm here for you if you want to
                talk about anything.
                    (beat)
                Is there anything you want to talk
                about?

                          LASER
                    (leave my room)
                Not really.

                          JULES
                    (fighting the impulse to
                     push it)
                Okay then. Go back to sleep.

      Jules pats her son and leaves.

      INT. JONI'S BEDROOM - DAWN
101                                                             101

      Jules enters and touches Joni's shoulder.
                             JULES
                Joni?
                                                                 84.

                           JONI
                 I don't want to talk to you.

                           JULES
                 Can we just--

                           JONI
                 I said I don't want to talk to
                 you!!

                            JULES
                 Okay.   I'm sorry.

      Jules slowly retreats to the door.

      INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - KITCHEN - MORNING
102                                                               102

      Jules drinks coffee at the table. Nic walks in, dressed for
      work. Jules looks at her, wanting to "process." But Nic
      isn't in the mood. She grabs a banana from a bowl and walks
      out. Jules feels like a leper.


      OMITTED.
103                                                               103

      INT. SASHA'S ROOM - AFTERNOON
104                                                               104

      We can tell Joni's been crying and downloading the whole
      thing to Sasha.
                           SASHA
                 How's Nic doing?

                           JONI
                 She's a wreck. I've never seen her
                 like this before.

      Joni's cell rings. She gets off the bed, looks at the phone.
      It's a picture of Paul.
                           SASHA
                 Is it him...?

      Joni nods gravely, answers.
                              JONI
                     (cold)
                 Hello.
                                                              85.

      EXT. PAUL'S FARM - AFTERNOON
105                                                            105

      Paul's walking through rows of swiss chard, cell phone to his
      ear.

      Conversation Intercut.

                          PAUL
                Hey Joni, how you doing?

                          JONI
                You're such a phony.

      Beat.

                             PAUL
                Excuse me?

                          JONI
                You act like you're so groovy and
                together but you're not. You're a
                shitty person!

                          PAUL
                What happened?
                          JONI
                With my mom?!

                           PAUL
                Listen, can I just come and talk
                with you--

                          JONI
                What's wrong with you?!
                             PAUL
                Joni...

                          JONI
                Don't call me anymore.
      Joni hangs up and start crying.    Sasha hugs her.


      EXT. PAUL'S FARM - CONTINUOUS
106                                                            106
      Sweaty, nauseous with remorse, Paul turns around to find
      fetching young Brooke, waiting for him with a wicker basket
      of huge cucumbers.
                          BROOKE
                Hey Paul, look at these cukes...
                                                                86.

      Paul holds up his hand at her.   This girl symbolizes every
      bad choice he's ever made.

      He gives her the universal, "Leave Me Alone" gesture.   Brooke
      looks embarrassed.


      EXT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - BACKYARD - AFTERNOON
107                                                                 107
      Jules sits on a lawn chair smoking a cigarette.    Her cell
      rings. She answers.

      EXT. STREET - AFTERNOON
108                                                                 108

      Paul walks down the street, wigging out.
                          PAUL
                Hey, it's me. I just talked to
                Joni.
      Conversation intercut.

                          JULES
                Oh my god, I'm so sorry.   I should
                have called you.
      Jules sucks a big, anxious drag off a cigarette.

                          PAUL
                What happened?
                          JULES
                Nic saw my hair in your bathroom.

                          PAUL
                The other night.

                          JULES
                Yeah.
                          PAUL
                Fuck...

                          JULES
                Yeah.
      Beat.

                          PAUL
                Listen, it's all out in the open
                now. Let's make this happen.
                                                                 87.

                          JULES
                Paul...

                          PAUL
                No, I'm serious. Fuck it. Let's get
                the kids together and do this
                thing.

                          JULES
                Paul, come on...

                          PAUL
                No! I'm sick of this life. I want
                a family. I'm ready--

                          JULES
                    (eye rolling)
                Jesus, Paul! I'm gay!

      Jules tosses the phone away from her.

      EXT. HOUSE PARTY - BACKYARD - NIGHT
109                                                               109

      Joni and Sasha stand at the makeshift "bar".    Joni's downs
      several Tequila shots quickly.
                          SASHA
                Slow down, tiger.

      Across the room, Joni spots Jai chatting with a WAIFY GIRL in
      a sundress.

      Joni drops one more Tequila shot and walks up to Jai and
      Waify girl, interrupting them.
                          JONI
                I like the scruff.   It's sexy.

      Waify girl juts out her hip territorially.
                          WAIFY GIRL
                Uh, `scuuuse me...

                          JONI
                You're excused.
                    (then back to Jai)
                Hey, can I talk to you?

      Joni leads Jai to a private corner.
                                                                  88.

      She leans in and kisses Jai. And Jai actually returns the
      kiss. And it's completely sweet and intimate.

      But then the kiss starts to morph as Joni's energy turns
      manic, intense, less romantic than emotionally needy. We see
      Jai start to pull away. But Joni keeps holding him, wanting
      more. Finally, Jai breaks off the kiss.

                             JAI
                   Joni...Joni...

                             JONI
                   What?

      Joni looks pained, embarrassed.      Jai keeps holding her hands.
                             JAI
                   Are you okay?

                             JONI
                   Yeah, I'm fine...
      Joni pulls free and escapes, leaving a confused Jai in her
      wake.

      INT. NIC AND JULES BEDROOM - NIGHT
110                                                                110

      Jules walks in to find Nic, awake, in bed.

                             JULES
                   Just getting another pillow.   The
                   couch is kind of saggy.

                             NIC
                   Is your back okay?
      Jules perks up: is this an invitation to share the bed again?

                             JULES
                   It's a little ache-y.
                             NIC
                   You should take some Advil.

      Guess not.
      Suddenly they hear bumping and loud footsteps downstairs.
                                                                 89.

      INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
111                                                               111

      Jules walks downstairs to find Joni stumbling toward her
      bedroom.

                            JULES
                Hey.    How was the party?

      Joni tries to avert her mom's questioning gaze.

                            JONI
                Fine.

                          JULES
                How big was it?
                          JONI
                I don't know. Medium...ish...

      Jules takes in the glassy look in her daughter's eyes.
                          JULES
                Are you drunk?

                            JONI
                No.
      Nic enters from the stairs, having caught the last piece.

                          NIC
                I hope you had a designated driver.
                            JONI
                Why?    I'm not drunk.

                          NIC
                Well, you seem drunk to me.

                          JONI
                Yeah, well, you should know.
                          NIC
                    (furious; incredulous)
                What did you just say to me?!

                          JONI
                I'm going to bed.

      Joni starts to leave.   Nic grabs her.

                          NIC
                No, you're not!    I'm not done
                talking to you!
                                                                90.

      Laser opens his door and watches the scene progress.

                          JONI
                What do you want from me?! I did
                everything you wanted! I got all
                A's! I got in everywhere I applied!
                Now you can show everybody what a
                perfect family you have!
                          JULES
                Don't talk to your mom like that!
      Joni spins to face Jules.

                          JONI
                You're really gonna tell me how to
                act? Now?!

                          JULES
                Hey, I'm still your mother.
                          JONI
                Whatever...

      Jules reaches out and Joni backs away, sickened.
                          JONI (CONT'D)
                Don't touch me!

      Joni heads for her room.
                          JONI (CONT'D)
                I'm so sick of both of you!


      EXT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - DAWN - MOS
112                                                              112
      The sun rises on this formerly happy home.


      INT. ALLGOOD LIVING ROOM - MORNING
113                                                              113
      Jules wakes up on the couch.   Sits up.   Rubs her aching back.


      INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - JONI'S BEDROOM - DAY
114                                                              114
      Joni packs for college. The room is littered with half-
      filled packing boxes. She picks up a pile of clothes from
      the corner and sees the farmer's hat Paul gave her. She puts
      it aside, not sure what to do with it.
                                                                 91.

      EXT. PAUL'S BACKYARD - DAY
115                                                               115

      Paul looks around his newly landscaped yard.     It looks more
      abandoned than revived.

      INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - NIGHT
116                                                               116

      The family has their last supper - before Joni leaves.

                          NIC
                Did you pack that lamp I gave you?

                            JONI
                Yeah.
                          NIC
                Well, we can always get stuff up
                there, too, if you need it, I mean
                if the room's dark or you need
                extra bedding...
                          JONI
                I'm not going to Siberia, mom.

      Jules looks at the family unit, misty.
                          JULES
                I can't believe this is our last
                dinner together.
                          LASER
                Oh God, are you gonna cry?

      Jules looks at her son, fed up.
                          JULES
                I wish you were gay.    You'd be so
                much more sensitive.

      The doorbell rings.
                          JONI
                It's probably Sasha.    I'll get it.

      Joni runs to the door.   Opens it. It's not Sasha.   It's Paul.
                          JONI (CONT'D)
                    (shocked)
                What are you doing here?
                                                                92.

                          PAUL
                I needed to talk to you before you
                left.
                          JONI
                There's nothing to talk about.

                          PAUL
                I just want to apologize again for
                what happened. I can't tell you
                how much I regret it.

      EXT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - SAME
117                                                              117

      Joni walks out for privacy, closes the door behind her.
                          JONI
                So like, everything that happened
                between us. What was that? Was
                that just bullshit?!
                          PAUL
                No, it wasn't bullshit at all. I
                know I don't seem credible right
                now but I really care about you...
      Paul struggles to keep his emotions in check.

                          PAUL (CONT'D)
                ...and I just hope someday we'll be
                able to see each other again. Do
                you think that could maybe happen?

                          JONI
                I don't know...
      Joni looks down welling up.

                          JONI (CONT'D)
                I just wish you could've been...
                            PAUL
                What?

      Joni chokes back tears.
                            JONI
                Better...

      Paul and Joni look up at each other when the door suddenly
      flings open. Nic is there, fuming.
                                                                93.

                          NIC
                You've got some balls, mister!

                          PAUL
                Nic, hold on...

      Nic walks toward he and Joni.   Joni ducks back inside.

                          NIC
                No, you hold on! Let me tell you
                something, you really hurt my kids!
                          PAUL
                Well, they're kinda my...

                          NIC
                    (cutting him off)
                No! They're not. This is not your
                family. This is my family! You're
                just a fucking interloper...
      Jules joins Nic, concerned things are getting out of hand.

                          PAUL
                I didn't mean to hurt anyone...
      Paul and Jules share a look as Nic deals the coup de grace.

                          NIC
                If you want a family so much, go
                out and make one of your own!
      Nic heads back inside and slams the door behind her.

      Paul stand alone, spinning. After a moment he spontaneously
      looks back into the house. Laser is staring at him through
      the window. Their eyes lock and Paul give Laser a contrite
      smile. That's the final straw for Laser. He grabs his plate
      and walks out of view.

      Reeling, Paul heads for his motorcycle. He gets on the bike,
      helmet in hand. Turns on the ignition. He picks up the
      helmet and pauses, shaking in the hell of his own making.
      Losing it, he hurls the helmet at the motorcycle.

      INT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - TV ROOM - THAT NIGHT
118                                                              118

      Laser, Joni and Nic watch "Locked Up Abroad" Jules walks in
      front of them, picks up the remote and turns off the TV.
                          JULES
                I need to say something.
                                                                94.

      Everyone sits up.   Jules acts stoic but she's wrecked.

                           JULES (CONT'D)
                 Look, it's no big secret your mom
                 and are in hell right now. Bottom
                 line...marriage is hard...really
                 fucking hard. Just two people,
                 slogging through the shit, year
                 after year, getting older,
                 changing. It's a fucking marathon,
                 okay?!
      Everyone is silenced by the outpouring.   Jules soldiers on.

                           JULES (CONT'D)
                 So sometimes you're together so
                 long, you just stop seeing the
                 other person. You just see weird
                 projections of your own junk. And
                 instead of talking to each other,
                 you go off the rails, and act
                 grubby and make stupid choices.
                 Which is what I did. And I feel
                 sick about it because I love you
                 guys and I love your mom and that's
                 the truth. Sometimes you hurt the
                 ones you love the most. I don't
                 know why. Maybe if I read more
                 Russian novels I would...

      Nic looks down, overwhelmed by it all.
                            JULES (CONT'D)
                 Anyway, I just wanted to say how
                 sorry I am about what I did and
                 that I hope you'll forgive me
                 eventually.
                     (awkward)
                 Thank you.

      And, without further ado, Jules hands the remote back to
      Laser and departs the field. Everyone's silenced by Jules'
      rambling apologia, especially Nic.


      OMITTED.
119                                                              119

      INT. JONI'S ROOM - MORNING
120                                                              120

      Joni wakes up. She looks around her room. There's nothing
      on the walls. The floor is covered with boxes taped and
      labeled. It's time to go.
                                                                 95.

      EXT. ALLGOOD HOUSE - DRIVEWAY - DAY
121                                                               121

      Nic and Jules stuff the last of Joni's things in the back of
      their station wagon. Laser and Joni bring the last of the
      boxes out of the house.


      INT. VOLVO STATION WAGON - DAY
122                                                               122
      The Allgoods are on the road, heading to college.


      OMITTED.
123                                                               123


      EXT. COLLEGE CAMPUS - DAY - ESTABLISHING
124                                                               124
      The station wagon passes through the campus.


      INT. STATION WAGON - DAY
125                                                               125
      As they drive past buildings and dorms, Joni sees STUDENTS
      swarming the campus. She takes it all in, nervous, excited.
      Nic and Jules steal looks back at Joni, feeling her
      nervousness, wishing they could take it away.

      EXT. STREET - DAY
126                                                               126

      The Allgoods pull up to the curb, get out.   Laser piles
      Joni's boxes on his skateboard.


      EXT. FRONT OF DORM - DAY
127                                                               127
      Laser dollies Joni's boxes though the corridor and while Joni
      and the moms follow behind.


      INT. DORM ROOM - MOMENTS LATER
      Nic and Jules follow Joni to the door.    They all jam up at
      the threshold.

                           JONI
                 Guys, it's okay.   I got it.

      Nic and Jules get the hint. They move back and Joni enters
      the room alone. Nic and Jules quietly turn and leave.
                                                                96.

      INT. JONI'S DORM ROOM - BEDROOM - LATER
128                                                              128

      Joni stands among her bags and boxes looking around. She
      goes into her suitcase and pulls out her linens. She starts
      making her bed but suddenly stops mid way. She stares out
      toward the hallway.

      Finally she moves to the doorway and looks out.    She realizes
      her family isn't there.

      EXT. DORM BUILDING - DAY
129                                                              129

      Joni exits, looking around to find her family. The station
      wagon is gone. She looks panicked. Her pace quickens as she
      makes her way down a hill toward the road.
      Finally Joni sees the Volvo heading towards her.

      The car pulls over to the curb and everyone gets out.   Joni
      looks vulnerable. She tries to cover it.
                          JONI
                Where'd you go?!

                          NIC
                We had to move the car.

                          JONI
                I thought you left.
                          JULES
                We wouldn't leave without saying
                goodbye.

                          NIC
                Give us some credit.

      And suddenly, everyone realizes...this is it. It's time to
      say goodbye. First Laser comes up and hugs Joni.
                          LASER
                It's gonna be weird not having you
                at home.

                          JONI
                Sorry to leave you alone with them.

                             LASER
                It's okay.     I can handle it.
      Laser backs up. Then the moms both come up and hug Joni,
      tears streaming down their faces.
                                                               97.

                           JONI
                Guys, come on...
                    (beat)
                Look, I'll talk to you soon.

      Joni tries to detach from the hug. But her moms won't let
      go. They keep holding her and crying.

      Slowly, their tears begin to break Joni down.

      Trapped in their loving embrace, Joni's feelings rise up,
      unbidden, overpowering her. She starts crying.

      The moms hold her tighter, which makes her cry even harder.

      Soon she's sobbing in her mothers' arms, as all the pressure,
      resentment and anger she's felt starts seeping out of her.

      Nic and Jules feel their daughter letting go.   They hold her
      tight to comfort her.
      They keep holding her until a calm sets in.

      The hug breaks apart. Nic pushes the hair from Joni's face.
      Joni gives her moms one last smile.
      Laser, Jules and Nic get back in the car. Joni stands
      watching as they drive off and her new life begins.


      INT. STATION WAGON - DAY
130                                                               130
      The family drives home. Jules is at the wheel. Nic's in the
      passenger seat, eyes red and puffy. Laser's in the back.

      No one speaks, everyone's lost in their own worlds.   Finally
      Laser breaks the spell.

                          LASER
                I don't think you guys should break
                up.
      A long beat.

                           NIC
                No?   Why's that?
                          LASER
                I think you're too old.

      Both Nic and Jules crack smiles. Their son's rudeness is
      unsurpassed. But then his words have an unexpected gravity.
                                                            98.

                     NIC
           Thanks, Laser.

Jules, disarmed and slightly smiling, reaches over and puts
her hand on Nic's leg. She gives it a gentle squeeze and
doesn't let go. Nic looks over to Jules, finally disarmed.

Nic reaches for Jules' hand and holds it tight.   Nic and
Jules look at each other, and then away.

Laser watches his moms holding hands from the back seat.
Their small gesture is what he needed. He smiles to himself,
grateful for a sign.

FADE OUT
THE END

Kids Are All Right, The



Writers :   Lisa Cholodenko  Stuart Blumberg
Genres :   Comedy  Drama


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