The Internet Movie Script Database (IMSDb)


The web's largest
movie script resource!

Search IMSDb

Alphabetical
# A B C D E F G H
I J K L M N O P Q
R S T U V W X Y Z

Genre
Action Adventure Animation
Comedy Crime Drama
Family Fantasy Film-Noir
Horror Musical Mystery
Romance Sci-Fi Short
Thriller War Western

Sponsor

TV Transcripts
Futurama
Seinfeld
South Park
Stargate SG-1
Lost
The 4400

International
French scripts

Movie Software
DVD ripper software offer
Rip from DVD
Rip Blu-Ray

Latest Comments
Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith10/10
Star Wars: The Force Awakens10/10
Batman Begins9/10
Collateral10/10
Jackie Brown8/10

Movie Chat



ALL SCRIPTS





                           THE SMELLY CAR



                             Written by

                     Larry David & Peter Mehlman




 
               
               
               (Comedy club)

               
               
               
                             JERRY
               ...And it *is* embarrassing, because 
               a doggie bag means either you
 
               
               are out at a restaurant when you aren't hungry, or you've chosen 
               the
 
               
               stupidest possible way to get dog food that there is. How about 
               the
 
               
               doggie bag on a date? That's a good move for a guy, huh? Lemme 
               tell
 
               
                             YOU SOMETHING
               if you're a guy and you ask for the 
               doggie bag on a
 
               
               date, you might as well have them just wrap up your genitals 
               too.
 
               
               You're not going to be needing those for awhile, either.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               Is that bothering you?

               
                             ELAINE
               No, not at all...

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             ELAINE
               Oh, could you please hurry?

               
                             JERRY
               (mockingly) "Please hurry". Look at 
               you. Look at what you've
 
               
               become.

               
                             ELAINE
               What? What have I become? I haven't 
               "become" anything...
 
               
                             JERRY
               Oh, *Carl* can't wait a few more minutes?
 
               
               
                             ELAINE
               I don't want to keep him waiting...
 
               
               
                             JERRY
               He'll like you more...

               
                             ELAINE
               That's impossible...

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             WIFE
               Andrew, why do you have to pick your 
               teeth at the table?
 
               
                             HUSBAND
               Leave me alone.

               
                             JERRY
               Yeah, I'm wanting to get married *real* 
               soon...
 
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               So, where am I dropping you?

               
                             ELAINE
               His place...

               
                             JERRY
               This guy's got quite a racket. I take 
               you to dinner and then drop
 
               
               you off at his apartment...

               
                             ELAINE
               *And* he gets the rest of my chicken...
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               So, is tonight "the night"?

               
                             ELAINE
               You never know...

               
                             JERRY
               Oooh! Bay-bee *doll*!

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               Boy, do you smell something?

               
                             ELAINE
               Do I smell something? What am I, hard 
               of smelling? Of *course* I
 
               
               smell something.

               
                             JERRY
               What is it?

               
                             ELAINE
               I think it's B.O.!

               
                             JERRY
               What?

               
                             ELAINE
               It's B.O. The *valet* must have had 
               B.O.
 
               
                             JERRY
               It *can't* be. Nobody has B.O. like 
               this.
 
               
                             ELAINE
               Jerry. It's *B*.*O*.

               
                             JERRY
               But the whole car smells.

               
                             ELAINE
               So?

               
                             JERRY
               So when somebody has B.O., the "O" usually 
               stays with the "B".
 
               
               Once the "B" leaves, the "O" goes with it.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             ELAINE
               I can't believe you ski!

               
                             CARL
               I'm a great skier.

               
                             ELAINE
               Yeah? What else?

               
                             CARL
               Let's see... I ski, I fish, I pillage, 
               I plunder...
 
               
                             ELAINE
               (delightedly) Oh! You "pillage and plunder"?
 
               
               
                             CARL
               ...When I travel.

               
                             ELAINE
               See? Finally, *finally* I get to meet 
               a man who pillages and
 
               
               plunders! I'm so lucky.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               This'll only take a second.

               
                             KRAMER
               Yeah, I'm going to poke around...

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               (to himself) Hey, whatd'ya know? Look 
               at that! A *lesbian*
 
               
               sighting. Oh-ho! My lucky day. They're *so* fascinating. Why 
               is
 
               
               that? Because they don't want us. You gotta respect that...
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               (to himself) Oh, my God! It's Susan! 
               What do I do?
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             SUSAN
               George?

               
                             GEORGE
               (to himself) Argh! (to Susan) Susan! 
               Hi! Oh, boy! What are
 
               
               you doing here?!

               
                             SUSAN
               Renting a video! What do you got there?
 
               
               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, ... some stupid movie...

               
                             SUSAN
               This is Mona.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, hi...

               
                             MONA
               Pleasure to meet you.

               
                             GEORGE
               Yes. Well...

               
                             MONA
               Well, I'll let you two, uh... catch 
               up.
 
               
               
               
               
               
                             SUSAN
               You okay?

               
                             GEORGE
               Yeah. Yes! I just haven't seen you in 
               a long time.
 
               
                             SUSAN
               And you didn't expect me to be holding 
               hands with a woman.
 
               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, *please*! Me? C'mon! That's *great*! 
               Are you kidding? I
 
               
               think thats fan*tastic*! I've always encouraged experimentation!
 
               
               
               I'm the first guy in the pool! Who do you think you're talking 
               to?
 
               
                             SUSAN
               I *know* who I'm talking to.

               
                             GEORGE
               Of course you do... It's just, uh, y'know, 
               I-I never *knew*, uh,
 
               
               that, uh...

               
                             SUSAN
               I liked women?

               
                             GEORGE
               There you go.

               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               So, uh, how long has this been going 
               on?
 
               
                             SUSAN
               Since you and I broke up.

               
                             GEORGE
               Ssssso, after me, you... went that way?
 
               
               
                             SUSAN
               Yeah.

               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, I think that's fantastic. Good for 
               you. Nice. That's very
 
               
               nice.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             SUSAN
               So, what have you got there?

               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, I, uh--

               
                             SUSAN
               Oh, ``Rochelle, Rochelle''

               
                             GEORGE
               It's a foreign movie... a *film*, is 
               what it is, actually.
 
               
                             SUSAN
               Yeah... A lot of nudity in that, huh?
 
               
               
                             GEORGE
               No, no, no... Just a *tiny* bit... It's 
               not even *frontal* nudity.
 
               
               It's... *sidal* nudity...

               
               
               
               
               
                             CLERK
               Next.

               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, that's me.

               
                             SUSAN
               Alright, well... Good seeing you, George.
 
               
               
                             GEORGE
               Yes, good to see you, too. And Good 
               luck with, uh... with the
 
               
               whole thing, there.

               
               
               
               
               
                             CLERK
               Uh, what are you returning?

               
                             GEORGE
               (embarrassed pause) ``Rochelle, Rochelle''.
 
               
               
                             CLERK
               Ah, ``Rochelle, Rochelle''... "A young 
               girl's strange, erotic
 
               
               journey from Milan to Minsk"...

               
               
               
               
               
                             CLERK
               Uh, that'll be, uh... $3.49.

               
                             GEORGE
               $3.49? It says $1.49.

               
                             CLERK
               Well, you didn't rewind it. There's 
               a $2.00 charge for not
 
               
               rewinding.

               
                             GEORGE
               What! There's no signs here! This is 
               an outrage!
 
               
                             KRAMER
               George, don't give him any money for 
               that. It'll cost you less to
 
               
               keep it another day, rewind it and bring it back tomorrow. Don't
 
               
               
               give him the satisfaction.

               
                             GEORGE
               I'm not giving you the satisfaction. 
               I'm gonna watch it again...
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               So, this morning I go down to the garage 
               to check the car out. I
 
               
               figure by this time, the odour molecules have had at least twelve
 
               
               
               hours to de-smellify. I open the car door, like a *punch* in 
               the
 
               
               *face*, the stench hits me-- it's almost as if it had *gained*
 
               
               
               strength throughout the night...

               
                             ELAINE
               Y'know I can think of at *least* six 
               known offensive odours that
 
               
               I would *rather* smell than what's livin' in your car.

               
                             JERRY
               What about skunk?

               
                             ELAINE
               I don't mind skunk.

               
                             JERRY
               Horse manure?

               
                             ELAINE
               I *loooove* horse manure.

               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               Well, I've never seen anything like 
               this in my life. In fact, I
 
               
               went to the car wash, they want 250 dollars to detail it, and 
               get
 
               
               the smell out. I'm not payin' for that. That's not my

               
               responsibility. In fact, I'm drivin' up to that restaurant now,
 
               
               
               and *demand* they pay for it.

               
                             ELAINE
               Absolutely.

               
               
               
               
               
                             ELAINE
               Listen, lemme ask you something. When 
               you're with a guy, and he
 
               
               tells you he has to get up early, what does that mean?

               
                             JERRY
               It means he's lying.

               
               
               
               
               
                             ELAINE
               Wow...

               
                             JERRY
               Why? Is that what he told you?

               
                             ELAINE
               Yeah, last night. Oh, come on... Men 
               *have* to get up early some
 
               
               time...

               
                             JERRY
               No. Never.

               
                             ELAINE
               Jerry! I'm *sure* I've seen men on the 
               street early in the morning.
 
               
                             JERRY
               Well, sometimes we do actually have 
               to get up early, but a man will
 
               
               *always* trade sleep for sex.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             ELAINE
               Is it possible I'm not as attractive 
               as I think I am?
 
               
                             JERRY
               Anything's *possible*...

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               What's the matter with you?

               
                             KRAMER
               Steinbrenner! He's ruinin' my life...
 
               
               
                             JERRY
               Oh yeah, Steinbrenner...

               
                             KRAMER
               I don't think I can take another season 
               with him, Jerry. He'll
 
               
               just trade away their best young prospects, just like he did 
               with
 
               
               Beuner, McGee, Drabek... McGriff...

               
                             JERRY
               I know the list...

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             KRAMER
               What's that smell?

               
                             JERRY
               What smell?

               
                             KRAMER
               Ooooh... You stink.

               
                             JERRY
               Whatd'ya mean I stink?

               
                             KRAMER
               You *stink*. Why don't you go take a 
               shower?
 
               
                             JERRY
               I showered! Oh, wait a second... Since 
               I showered, I've been in
 
               
               the car!

               
                             ELAINE
               So?

               
                             JERRY
               Don't you see what's happening here? 
               It's attached itself to me!
 
               
               It's alive!

               
                             ELAINE
               If it attached itself to you, then... 
               Oh, my God! That's why Carl
 
               
               said he had to get up early! Because I stink! Jerry, he thinks 
               I
 
               
               have B.O.! Me!

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             KRAMER
               What happened?

               
                             JERRY
               What happened? My car *stinks* is what 
               happened. And it's
 
               
               destroying the lives of everyone in it's path.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               What is that? B.O.?

               
                             JERRY
               Yeah.

               
                             GEORGE
               This is *unbelievable* B.O.

               
                             JERRY
               I know... I was at the car wash this 
               morning and the guy told me
 
               
               in his 38 years in the business, he's never smelled anything 
               like
 
               
               it.

               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               So, let me ask you. Do you think I could 
               have done this?
 
               
                             JERRY
               No, no. It's the valet guy.

               
                             GEORGE
               No, no, I mean, driving Susan to lesbianism.
 
               
               
                             JERRY
               Oh... No, that's ridiculous.

               
                             GEORGE
               What if her experience with me *drove* 
               her to it?
 
               
                             JERRY
               Suicide, maybe, not lesbianism.

               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               The woman she's "lesbianing" with? Susan 
               told me she's *never*
 
               
               been with a guy.

               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, this isn't even B.O.! This is *beyond* 
               B.O.! It's *B*.B.O.!
 
               
                             JERRY
               There should be a B.O. squad that patrols 
               the city like a "Smell
 
               
               Gestapo". To sniff 'em out, strip 'em down, and wash them with 
               a
 
               
               big, soapy brush...

               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               Y'know, the funny thing is, somehow 
               I find her more appealing
 
               
               now... It's like if I knew she was a lesbian when we went out, 
               I
 
               
               never would've broken up with her.

               
                             JERRY
               Lemme see if I understand this... On 
               second thought...
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               Here he is... that's the guy! (rolls 
               up window)
 
               
               No, thank you, go back... go back... I'll park it! You go back!
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               What do you mean-- "stunk up"?

               
                             JERRY
               I mean the car *stinks*! George, does 
               the car stink?
 
               
                             GEORGE
               Stinks.

               
                             JERRY
               Stinks!

               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               Well, perhaps *you're* the one who has 
               the odour...
 
               
                             JERRY
               Hey, I've never smelled in my *life*, 
               buddy!
 
               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               Really? Well, I smell you now.

               
                             JERRY
               That's from the car!

               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               Well, maybe *you're* the one who stunk 
               up the car, rather
 
               
               than the car stinking up you!

               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, it's the chicken and the egg...
 
               
               
                             JERRY
               Thank you very much... Well, then go 
               out and smell the car;
 
               
               see which smells worse.

               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               I don't have time to smell cars.

               
                             GEORGE
               Forget about smelling the car. Smell 
               the valet. Go to the
 
               
               source...

               
                             JERRY
               You've gotta smell the car

               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               I'm a busy man

               
                             JERRY
               C'mon! One whiff!

               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               Alright, one whiff...

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               Alright! I give up! I admit it! It stinks! 
               Now will you
 
               
               let me out!

               
                             JERRY
               Alright, will you pay for the cleaning?
 
               
               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               Yes! 50 dollars! I'll give you 50 dollars!
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             RESTAURATEUR
               I'm not paying for *that*. They've already 
               got my seven
 
               
               dollars... (sarcastically) "...erotic journey from Milan to
 
               
               
               Minsk"...

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             CARL
               The valet had such bad B.O.?

               
               ELAINE: OH, MAN, JUST *RAMPANT*, MUTANT B.O. THE "O" WENT FROM 
               THE
 
               
               valet's "B", to the car, to me. It clings to everything. Jerry
 
               
               
               thinks it's an entity. But I showered and I shampoo'ed, so...
 
               
               
                             CARL
               That's a relief...

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             ELAINE
               What?

               
                             CARL
               It's still there...

               
                             ELAINE
               No, no, no! It *can't* be! I shampoo'ed! 
               I rinsed! I repeated!
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               Listen, I gotta ask you: I was a little 
               concerned that perhaps I
 
               
               was responsible in some way for your, uh... metamorphosis.

               
                             CLERK
               That'll be $98.00.

               
                             GEORGE
               What $98.00?

               
                             CLERK
               That's what I said. $98.00.

               
                             GEORGE
               How could that piece of *crap* cost 
               $98.00!?
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               So, was it me?

               
                             SUSAN
               Oh, don't be ridiculous! Is that what 
               you wanted to talk to me
 
               
               about? (Gives him the $35) Here.

               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, thanks. Thanks a lot. I'll pay you 
               back.
 
               
                             SUSAN
               Yeah, *sure*... I gotta go.

               
                             GEORGE
               Listen. Let me ask you something. If 
               you and Mona were ever
 
               
               to... dance, how do you decide who leads? I mean... do you take
 
               
               
               turns? Do you discuss it beforehand? How does that work?

               
                             SUSAN
               You're an idiot.

               
                             GEORGE
               Why? That's a *legitimate* sociological 
               question.
 
               
                             SUSAN
               I'll see ya. And George, by the way... 
               You stink... Real bad.
 
               
                             GEORGE
               It's not me! It's the car!

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             MONA
               I didn't think I'd come.

               
                             KRAMER
               I knew you would.

               
                             MONA
               Oh, Kramer!

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             CAR WASHER
               We spray everything with Ozium-D, let 
               it de-ionise, vacuum the
 
               
               spray out with a de-ionising machine. Hit it with high-pressure
 
               
               
               compressed air, and wet-dry vac it to extract the remaining
 
               
               
               liquids. We top it off with one of our seven air-fresheners, 
               in
 
               
               your case, I would recommend the Jasmine, or the Potpourri.
 
               
               
                             JERRY
               Let's do it.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             HAIRDRESSER
               The first thing we're gonna do is flush 
               the follicles with the
 
               
               five essential oils. Then, we put you under a vapour machine,
 
               
               
               and then a heated cap. Then, we shampoo and shampoo and

               
               condition and condition. Then, we saturate the hair in diluted
 
               
               
               vinegar-- two parts vinegar, 10 parts water. Now, if that

               
               doesn't work, we have one last resort. Tomato sauce.

               
                             ELAINE
               Tomato Sauce?

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               Wait a minute! It still smells! It still 
               smells!
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             CARL
               It still smells.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               It still smells!

               
                             GEORGE
               How could it still smell after all that?
 
               
               
                             JERRY
               I don't know!

               
                             GEORGE
               Well, what are you gonna do?

               
                             JERRY
               I'll tell you what I'm gonna do, I'm 
               selling that car!
 
               
                             GEORGE
               You're *selling* the car!?

               
                             JERRY
               You don't understand what I'm up against. 
               This is a force more
 
               
               powerful than anything you can imagine. Even *Superman* would 
               be
 
               
               helpless against this kind of stench. And I'll take anything 
               I can
 
               
               get for it.

               
                             GEORGE
               Maybe I'll buy it.

               
                             JERRY
               Are you crazy? Don't you understand 
               what I'm saying to you? This
 
               
               is not just an odour-- you need a *priest* to get rid of this 
               thing!
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             ELAINE
               I still smell!

               
                             JERRY
               You see! You see what I'm saying to 
               you? It's a presence! It's
 
               
               the beast!

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             SUSAN
               Kramer! Kramer! Kramer, open up, I know 
               you're in there!
 
               
                             JERRY
               Susan!

               
                             SUSAN
               Kramer!

               
                             JERRY
               What is going on?

               
                             SUSAN
               You know what's going on? First, he 
               vomits on me. Then, he burns
 
               
               down my father's cabin. And now, he's taken Mona away from me.
 
               
               
                             GEORGE
               He stole your girlfriend?

               
                             SUSAN
               Yes. She's in *love* with him.

               
                             GEORGE
               Amazing. I drive them to lesbianism, 
               he brings 'em back.
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               That's the *least* of what you've accomplished...
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             ELAINE
               Wait a minute, wait a minute. Kramer, 
               Kramer... Hold on a second.
 
               
               I don't get this. This woman has *never* been with a man her
 
               
               
               *entire* life--

               
                             KRAMER
               I'm Kramer.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               I know what you're going through. Women. 
               Who knows what they want?
 
               
                             SUSAN
               I just don't know what she sees in *Kramer*.
 
               
               
                             GEORGE
               Listen. You're beautiful. You're intelligent. 
               You'll meet other
 
               
               girls...

               
                             SUSAN
               You think so?

               
                             GEORGE
               Yes, I know so. You happen to be a very 
               eligible lesbian.
 
               
                             SUSAN
               You're very sweet...

               
                             GEORGE
               Hey, I know what I'm talking about. 
               I gotta be honest with you, I
 
               
               gotta tell ya... Ever since I saw you holding hands with that
 
               
               
               woman, I can't get you out of my mind.

               
                             SUSAN
               Really?

               
                             GEORGE
               Yeah, you're just so... hip.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             GEORGE
               Oh, my God...

               
                             SUSAN
               What?

               
                             GEORGE
               It's Allison. I dated her right after 
               you. She's obsessed with me.
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             ALLISON
               George?

               
                             GEORGE
               Allison! Hi! Oh, my God! How are you?
 
               
               
                             ALLISON
               Good. You know, you owe me $50...

               
                             GEORGE
               Right. I don't have it on me. Allison, 
               this is Susan. Susan,
 
               
               Allison.

               
                             ALLISON
               Nice to meet you...

               
                             SUSAN
               Nice to meet you...

               
                             ALLISON
               That's a beautiful vest...

               
                             SUSAN
               Thank you...

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             KRAMER
               I don't understand it. I was with her 
               last night in my apartment;
 
               
               it was very romantic. Y'know with that fake wood wallpaper, the
 
               
               
               atmosphere is *fabulous* in there, now. It's like a ski lodge.
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             SALESMAN
               What year did you say this was?

               
                             JERRY
               '90.

               
               
               
               
               
                             KRAMER
               Anyway, we were on the couch, I move 
               to hug her, next thing she
 
               
               tells me she's leaving; she's got to get up early.

               
                             JERRY
               That's strange...

               
               
               
               
               
                             SALESMAN
               How many miles you got on this thing?
 
               
               
                             JERRY
               23 000.

               
               
               
               
               
                             KRAMER
               And I was looking good, too. I had a 
               nice, new shirt on, I'm
 
               
               wearing *your* jacket...

               
                             JERRY
               Wait a second... My jacket! I wore that 
               in the car! The Beast!
 
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             SALESMAN
               I can't sell this car.

               
               JERRY: THIS... THING... HAS GOT TO BE STOPPED!

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             HAIRDRESSER
               So, what do you want to do?

               
                             ELAINE
               Sauce me.

               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
               
                             JERRY
               Why do we need B.O.? What is the function 
               of it? Everything in
 
               
               nature has a reason, has a purpose, except B.O. Doesn't make 
               any
 
               
               sense-- do something good, hard work, exercise, smell very bad.
 
               
               
               This is the way the human being is designed. You move, you stink.
 
               
               
               Why can't our bodies help us? Why can't sweat smell good? It'd 
               be
 
               
               a different world, wouldn't it? Instead of putting your laundry 
               in
 
               
               the hamper, you'd put it in a vase. You'd go down to the drugstore
 
               
               
               and pick up some odourant and perspirant. You'd probably have 
               a
 
               
               dirty sweat sock hanging from the rear-view mirror of your car.
 
               
               
               And then on a really special night, maybe a little underwear 
               comin'
 
               
               out of your breast pocket. Just to let her know she's important.
 

               
               
                                   THE END



The Smelly Car



Writers :   Larry David  Peter Mehlman
Genres :   Comedy


User Comments







Index    |    Submit    |    Links    |    Link to us    |    RSS Feeds    |    Disclaimer    |    Privacy policy