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                                     "SOUTH PARK"


                                     Episode 714


                                      "RAISINS"


                                      Written by 


                                     Trey Parker





               [South Park Elementary playrgound, recess or lunch. The camera 
               pans across the playground and settles on two teams of seven 
               players each. A football lies on the ground between the two groups. 
               The group left of the football consists of Stan, Kyle, Cartman, 
               Kenny, Butters, Token, and Clyde. The second includes Craig, 
               Tweek, Kevin, Pip, and three others]
 
                                     STAN
                         All right, you guys, it's first down. 
                         I'll hike the ball on the third "set 
                         hut!" Kyle and Cartman, go deep post 
                         out. Kenny, run a slant down the middle. 
                         Butters, be ready for the screen.
 
                         
                                     CARTMAN
                         Right. What are we playing again?

                                     STAN
                         Football.

                                     CARTMAN
                         Got it. 

                                     STAN
                         Okay. 23!  Blue, 23! Set hut! Set hut! 
                         
 
                                     BEBE
                         Wendy breaks up.

                                     STAN
                         What? 

                                     BEBE
                         Wendy breaks up with you. 

                                     STAN
                          Oh whoa, wait a minute.  What did I 
                         do wrong? I haven't even talked to Wendy 
                         for weeks.
 
                                     BEBE
                         She just doesn't wanna be with you anymore. 
                         She said she still wants to be friends. 
                         
 
                                     CARTMAN
                         What-ever, Bebe! Like Stan really cares! 
                         Just get out of our football game, you 
                         stupid skank!
 
                                     BEBE
                         Fuck you, fatass! You guys are assholes!
 
                         
                                     BUTTERS
                         Oh yeah? Huwell, at least we have assholes, 
                         you dumb girl!
 
                                     CARTMAN
                         Yeh-heah, right!

                                     BEBE
                         God, you're so stupid! 

                                     CARTMAN
                         What a whore! 

                                     KYLE
                         Yeah! Like Stan gives a crap if Wendy 
                         breaks up!  Stan? 
 
                                     CARTMAN
                          Come on, Stan, it's first down still. 
                         
 
               [Stan is next seen walking onto a small red stone bridge. The 
               next scene has him walking down the middle of a two-lane road 
               in the rain. He stops to take in the moist air. The next scene 
               has him back on the bridge, looking over the creek with his head 
               on his right hand. On the water he sees a reflection of Wendy 
               walk up to him. She's smiling. He brightens as she approaches. 
               He turns to greet her, but there's no one to greet. He looks 
               back at the creek, then turns around and walks off. The next 
               scene has him at a rainy night sitting on the curb in a run-down 
               part of town, under a working street light, with his face buried 
               in his legs, crying. The last scene has him in his room, sitting 
               on the floor by his bed, looking at a picture of Wendy. He gently 
               strokes the picture, which has Wendy holding a daisy and smiling 
               broadly. On the picture are written the words "I love you forever. 
               Wendy." The image fades to black]
 
               [South Park Elementary, day. In the hallway Craig goes to a drinking 
               fountain for a drink of water. Fosse and Dog Poo walk towards 
               the camera. Stan is at the far end watching Wendy open her locker. 
               Stan looks away and walks towards Kyle, who's seated next to 
               his locker reading a book.]
 
                                     STAN
                         Kyle, will you talk to Wendy for me?
 
                         
                                     KYLE
                          Why?

                                     STAN
                         'Cause I need to know why she broke 
                         up.
 
                                     KYLE
                         Aw, dude, come on. I gotta do my science 
                         homework.
 
                                     STAN
                          Dude, please. I might still have a 
                         chance to make things work. Please, 
                         just go talk to her?
 
                                     KYLE
                          God damnit!  Wendy, Stan wants to know 
                         why you break up. 
 
                                     WENDY
                         Look, Stan is really nice. I just don't 
                         wanna be boyfriend and girlfriend anymore. 
                         I've been wanting to break up for a 
                         while. but it's, it's nothing against 
                         him.
 
                                     KYLE
                         'K.  She says she's been wantin' to 
                         break up for a while, and it's nothing 
                         against you.
 
                                     STAN
                         What? That's no answer!  Go tell her 
                         to be more direct with me.
 
                                     KYLE
                          No dude, I'm out. Go talk to her yourself. 
                         Be poetic. 
 
                                     STAN
                         Kyle, this is my life.  Jimmy!

                                     JIMMY
                         Hey Stan.

                                     STAN
                         Jimmy, will you go talk to Wendy for 
                         me?
 
                                     JIMMY
                         For- Forw- Forw-w-w what?

                                     STAN
                         Just go talk to her an, and be poetic. 
                         Tell her she's my Muse-no! Tell her, 
                          tell her...  she's a con-tinuing source 
                         of inspiration to me.
 
                                     JIMMY
                         She's what?

                                     STAN
                         She's a continuing source of inspiration 
                         to me.
 
                                     JIMMY
                         ...Okay.  Hey uh-Wen, hey wu-Wemdy. 
                         
 
                                     WENDY
                         Yeah?

                                     JIMMY
                         Stan says your a cont... you're a- cont- 
                         S-Stan says you're a cont- cont-
 
                                     WENDY
                         Well tell Stan to stop!! 

                                     JIMMY
                         -cont- You're a cont-tinuing source 
                         of inspiration to him. 
 
                                     STAN
                         Well?

                                     JIMMY
                         She just- w-walked away, Stan. You're 
                         gonna have to face facts. It's over. 
                         
 
                                     STAN
                          Over?  Jesus...

                                     BUTTERS
                         We came over to cheer you up, Stan!
 
                         
                                     STAN
                          ...Go away.

                                     KYLE
                         Stan, you can't keep doing this to yourself. 
                         You have to go live.
 
                                     STAN
                         Why? What's the point of living when 
                         the only girl I ever loved is gone?
 
                         
                                     CARTMAN
                         God, what a fag!

                                     KYLE
                         Dude, not now! 

                                     STAN
                         You guys have no idea how this feels. 
                         It's like, you always hear songs about 
                         a broken heart and you think it's just 
                         a figure of speech? But it's true. My 
                         chest hurts. I feel this like, sinking 
                         feeling where my heart is. It's broken...
 
                         
                                     KYLE
                         Jeez, he's worse than I thought.

                                     BUTTERS
                         Well what do we do now?

                                     JIMMY
                         Should I try telling him a fa-fantastic 
                         joke?
 
                                     KYLE
                         No. We just have to show him that there's 
                         other girls out there. I say we take 
                         him to Raisins.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         What's Raisins?

               [Next day, Raisins, a Hooters-like restaurant with al-fresco 
               dining. The boys enter the restaurant, and a pretty little girl 
               in a Raisins outfit walks up. Other girls walk around, all seem 
               to work there]
 
                                     BLONDE
                         Hey guys, welcome to Raisins. Six of 
                         you?  Right over here. 
 
                                     REDHEAD
                          So you guys having a good time today?
 
                         
                                     DINERS
                          Uh huh...

                                     BLONDE 2
                          How about some more fun fries, guys?
 
                         
                                     DINERS
                          Okay... 

                                     BRUNETTE
                          Boy, am I glad you guys came in. Everyone 
                         here is such a loser, but you guys seem 
                         really cool.
 
                                     BLONDE
                          Here you go, guys. Lexus will be right 
                         with you.
 
                                     KYLE
                         What do you think, Stan. These girls 
                         are pretty cute, huh?
 
                                     JIMMY
                         Jesus Christ, I think I've died and... 
                         gone to... heaven.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         This place is awesome!

                                     CARTMAN
                         How do you know? We haven't even tried 
                         the food yet.
 
                                     LEXUS
                          Hey guys.

                                     BUTTERS
                         Whoa!

                                     LEXUS
                         How are we doing this afternoon?

                                     THE BOYS
                         Good.

                                     LEXUS
                         I'm so glad you guys came in. Everyone 
                         here is such a loser, but you guys seem 
                         really cool.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                          W-we are.

                                     LEXUS
                         So what can I get you?

                                     CARTMAN
                         Okay, um, we're gonna get the zingy 
                         tangy wings, and mozzarella tasty tarts 
                          and uh, OH, and the bite-size pizzazzas, 
                         and a pitcher of lemonade.
 
                                     LEXUS
                         Great. I'll put your order in right 
                         now. 
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         You guys! I think our Raisins girl likes 
                         me. She, she touched my back when she 
                         walked away. Did you see that?
 
                                     LEXUS
                          Raisins, girls! 

                                     BLONDE 3
                         Woohoo!

                                     REDHEAD
                         Oh Yeah!

                                     BRUNETTE 2
                          Do it!

                                     KYLE
                         Hey. Hey, look over there, Stan. That 
                         Raisins girl is really cure, huh?  Why 
                         don't you say hi to her?  Excuse me? 
                         
 
                                     BRUNETTE 3
                          Hi guys. My name's Porsche.

                                     KYLE
                         Hey. Uh, this is Stan.

                                     PORSCHE
                         Oh hey cutie. How are you? I love your 
                         hat. I used to have a hat juuust like 
                         that, except, it was black and it didn't 
                         have a puffball on it. Oh my God, my 
                         hands are sooo cold. How come people 
                         have hands, anyway? Did you ever wonder 
                         that? 
 
               [Some time later, still dining. The Village People's "YMCA" begins 
               to play, and some Raisins girls begin to dance]
 
                                     RAISINS GIRLS
                         YMCA...  YMCA-A.

                                     CARTMAN
                          Omigod! You guys... this is the greatest 
                         place in the world... 
 
                                     PORSCHE
                          Have you ever noticed how much sand 
                         there is at the beach? I mean, haven't 
                         you ever wondered where all this sand 
                         came from? Omigod, this one time, I 
                         saw a beetle that was thiiis big. Eeewww!
 
                         
                                     STAN
                         Can we go, please?

                                     KYLE
                         Okay. Okay, come on you guys. 

                                     PORSCHE
                         Oooh my God, thank you guys sooo much 
                         for coming to Raisins! 
 
                                     LEXUS
                          Oooh, sweetie, are you leaving?

                                     BUTTERS
                         Well, I don't want to, Lexus, but my 
                         stupid friends wanna go.
 
                                     LEXUS
                         Awww, well, when am I gonna get to see 
                         you again??
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         When do you wanna see me?

                                     LEXUS
                          As soon as possible!

                                     BUTTERS
                         Oh my God! Here, we left you a tip already, 
                         but here is another five dollars. 
 
                         
                                     LEXUS
                         Oooh, you are such a sweetie. Come here, 
                         youuu! 
 
                                     BUTTERS
                          Waa... ahaaah... 

                                     RAISINS GIRL
                         Bye, guys! Thanks for coming to Raisins!
 
                         
                                     JIMMY
                         Well, Stan. Do you feel, uhb- better 
                         now?
 
                                     STAN
                         No, dude, I feel worse!

                                     KYLE
                         Look, we're just trying to show you 
                         there's other girls out there.
 
                                     STAN
                         Dude, I don't have time to start over 
                         with other girls. I'm nine years old, 
                         dude! If I don't work things out with 
                         Wnedy, I could be alone my whole life!
 
                         
                                     BUTTERS
                          She wants to see me again! My Raisins 
                         girl said she wants to see me again!
 
                         
                                     STAN
                         I can't let Wendy go. This whole time 
                         I've been having my friends do all thealking 
                         for me. It's time I took control! 
 
                         
                                     KYLE
                         What are you doing?

                                     STAN
                         Something I should have done a long 
                         time ago. 
 
               [Bebe's house, night. Stan walks towards the fromt door, looks 
               around, and knocks three times. No response, so he knocks again. 
               The door opens and Bebe appears]
 
                                     STAN
                         Bebe, you need to go talk to Wendy for 
                         me right now!  All this time I've been 
                         trying to have my friends do all the 
                         talking for me! Now I realize I need 
                         her friends to do it! Tell her I love 
                         her!
 
                                     BEBE
                         Stan, why don't you show her you love 
                         her? If you really want Wendy back, 
                         try doing the most romantic thing you 
                         can think of.
 
                                     STAN
                          Okay, so what's the most romantic thing 
                         I can think of?
 
                                     BEBE
                         If you really want a shot at getting 
                         her back, stand outside her window, 
                         hold a boombox over your head, and play 
                          Peter Gabriel.
 
               [Wendy's house, night. Stan stands on the lawn with a boombox, 
               looking up at Wendy's window. He presses the play button and 
               holds up the boombox. Peter Gabriel's "Shock the Monkey" plays 
               from somewhere in the middle. Wendy appears at the window and 
               looks down, her jaw dropping. Stan holds the boombox higher, 
               keeping Wendy's gaze on him. Wendy covers her mouth as Token 
               appears next to her at the window. Stan's jaw drops. Wendy leaves 
               the window. Token unleashes the curtain ties, and the curtains 
               close upon the window]
 
               [Raisins, night, outside. The outside lights turn off. Butters 
               waits outside on the curb with a present. The front door opens 
               and Lexus appears. Butters rises to greet her]
 
                                     LEXUS
                         Okay, Porsche, see you tomorrow. Bye, 
                         Mercedes.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                          Lexus! 

                                     LEXUS
                         Uh oh. Uh, hi, sweetie.

                                     BUTTERS
                         I waited all night for you to get off 
                         work.
 
                                     LEXUS
                         Oh, really?  Huhunh, that's great. Uhm, 
                         Maury...
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         I I just could- I just couldn't stop 
                         thinking about you.
 
                                     MAURY
                          There a problem?

                                     LEXUS
                         Could you uh just help walk me to my- 
                         bike?
 
                                     MAURY
                         Right. 

                                     LEXUS
                          Thanks again for the big tip. You are 
                         such a sweetie. Come back and see me 
                         real soon, okay? 
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Oh wait, Lexus. Jeheez, I almost forgot. 
                         Ah I got you this present.
 
                                     LEXUS
                          Oh wow. Thanks, cutie.

                                     BUTTERS
                         It's a little stuffed bear dressed as 
                         a rabbit. 
 
                                     LEXUS
                         Gosh, that's the nicest gift I've gotten 
                         all night. Thank you.  Well I gotta 
                         go, honey. Be sure to come back to Raisins 
                         and see me again, okaaay? 
 
                                     BUTTERS
                          Well yeah, but, but, hey,  hey Lexus? 
                         Well I was thinking, well, I was thinking 
                         that we should- go do something sometime.
 
                         
                                     LEXUS
                         Oh gee, that would be great, honey, 
                         but I'm reeeally busy this week. Tell 
                         you what: you come back to Raisins and 
                         then we'll be able to hang out all we 
                         want, okay? 
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         O-kay!

                                     LEXUS
                         Bye, cutie!

                                     BUTTERS
                         Bye, bye darling!  Wow... a real-life 
                         relationship.
 
               [South Park Elementary, day. All the boys are in various stages 
               of dress. Most of them are in their P.E. uniforms]
 
                                     MR. GARRISON
                          All right, kids! Out on the gym floor 
                         for P.E. class. 
 
                                     KYLE
                          Come on, Stan. We're gonna play dodgeball.
 
                         
                                     STAN
                          I can't believe it. She's in love with 
                         somebody else.
 
                                     KYLE
                         Dude, you need to snap out of this! 
                         So Wendy left you for Token. What are 
                         you gonna do? Just be miserable your 
                         whole life?
 
                                     STAN
                         There's nothing else I can do. She was 
                         my whole life.
 
                                     KYLE
                         Aw, come on, dude! All you've done for 
                         the last four days is mope around! You 
                         might as well hang out with those Goth 
                         kids who dress in black and talk about 
                         pain all the time!
 
                                     STAN
                         Maybe I should. At least they will understand 
                         me. Maybe I should hang with the Goth 
                         kids.
 
               [South Park Elementary, loading bay. Stan finds the boys]

                                     GOTH 1
                          Life is pain. Life is only pain.  We're 
                         all taught to believe in happy fairytale 
                         endings.  But there's only blackness. 
                         Dark, depressing loneliness that  eats 
                         at your soul.
 
                                     GOTH 2
                          Who needs that kind of Barbie love, 
                         anyway? Everyone's just walking around 
                         like a bunch of conforminsts. Go ahead 
                         and wear your business suits so you 
                         can make thirty-four thousand dollars 
                         a year to buy your condominium. They're 
                         all zombies racing to their graves. 
                         Love didn't work for my mom and dad. 
                         Why should it work for me?
 
                                     GOTH GIRL
                         My dad is such an asshole. Drunken bastard 
                         doesn't even know I exist. But then 
                         he won't let me go to the Skinny Puppy 
                         concert because my heroine-addict aunt 
                         is coming over for dinner.  Dinner? 
                         That's a laugh. Just an excuse for my 
                         mom to bitch at me for not wearing girly 
                         clothes like all the Britney Spears 
                         wannabes at this school.
 
                                     LITTLE GOTH
                         They're all a bunch of Nazi conformists 
                         cheerleaders. 
 
                                     STAN
                         But if life is only pain, then... what's 
                         the point of living?
 
                                     GOTH 1
                         Just to make life more miserable for 
                         the conformists. 
 
                                     STAN
                         All right, so how do I join you?

                                     GOTH 2
                         If you wanna be one of the non-conformists, 
                         all you have to do is dress just like 
                         us and listen to the same music we do.
 
                         
                                     STAN
                         ...'K.

               [Raisins, day. Raisins is preparing for a new day of food and 
               fun. Mercedes escorts a new employee around]
 
                                     MERCEDES
                         Okay, I know it's your first day, Ferrari, 
                         so I wanna go over the basics with you.
 
                         
                                     FERRARI
                         Okay.

                                     MERCEDES
                         First of all, there's a five foot rule. 
                         If you come within five feet of a customer, 
                         you need to acknowledge them, even if 
                         they're not at your table. "Hey, cudie." 
                          When you're not serving food or talking 
                         with customers, you need to dance around 
                         and have fun.  We use things like Hula 
                         Hoops, silly strings, and water guns 
                         to play with the other girls. Be sure 
                         to giggle a lot, and be sure to show 
                         off your raisins.  Now, when you take 
                         a customer's order, you need to sit 
                         down at the table with them and make 
                         them think you're interested. Write 
                         your name down for them and make them 
                         feel special. "Oh man, I am so bored. 
                         Thank God you guys came in." If you 
                         want good tips, the most important thing 
                         is physical contact. Just a simple hold 
                         of the arm can mean the difference between 
                         five and twenty dollars. "I'll be right 
                         back with your order, guys." 
 
                                     FERRARI
                         Wow, thank you so much, Mercedes.

                                     MERCEDES
                         Okay. Well, I guess we're ready to open 
                         for business. Good luck.  Go ahead and 
                         open for business, Porsche!
 
                                     PORSCHE
                         Okay! 

                                     RAISINS GIRL
                         Hi, welcome to Raisins!

                                     BUTTERS
                         Hi! Is Lexus here?

                                     LEXUS
                         Hey, cutie.

                                     BUTTERS
                         Darling!

                                     LEXUS
                          How are we doing today?

                                     BUTTERS
                          Oh God. I missed you so much.

               [The Goth girl's room. It's quite the room, with posters for 
               Happy Puppy and the Nothing Matters tour, a Blauhaus poster, 
               candles all around, a mace on the floor, cigarettes next to a 
               book, an ornate candelabrum and chair, and a darkened atmosphere.]
 
               
                                     GOTH GIRL
                         
               Shallow life.

               Drowning alone, I gasp for air.

               Coldness creeps over pale skin.

               There is sadness so deep it pulls me down

               Happiness dies in a deep, dark sea.

                                     GOTH 1
                         Yeah, happiness dies. 

                                     STAN
                          Yeah.

                                     GOTH 2
                         All right, your turn, Stan. Read one 
                         of your poems about pain.
 
                                     STAN
                         

               There is darkness all around me

               Deep, piercing black, I cannot breathe

               My heart has been raped.

                                     GOTH GIRL
                         Whoa.

                                     STAN
                         The pain is everlasting.

               I miss you so much, babe.

               Want to hold you in my arms again, girl.

               Want to-

                                     GOTH 1
                         Whoa, whoa! Dude! Those last two lines 
                         aren't Goth!
 
                                     STAN
                         They're not?

                                     GOTH 2
                         No, dude! You can't say "I miss you 
                         so much, babe. I want to hold you in 
                         my arms."
 
                                     GOTH GIRL
                         Make it "I miss seeing you so much I 
                         wanna slash my eyes out with razor blades."
 
                         
                                     GOTH GIRL'S MOM
                          Henrietta! Hi sweetie!

                                     HENRIETTA
                         Go away Mom! Leave me alone!

                                     HENRIETTA'S MOM
                         Daddy and I just got your birthday present! 
                         But you can't see what it is till tomorrow!
 
                         
                                     HENRIETTA
                         You'd like to wait till I was dead, 
                         wouldn't you? You'd like to see maggots 
                         eat my face.
 
                                     HENRIETTA'S MOM
                         Ee-you are so creative, honey.

                                     HENRIETTA
                         Conformist bitch.

                                     OTHER GOTHS
                         Yeah.

               [Raisins, day. Two of the Raisins girls are entertaining the 
               child customers, who respond enthusiatically. The phone rings 
               and Porsche arrives to answer it.]
 
                                     PORSCHE
                         Thanks for calling Raisins. This is 
                         Porsche. Have you tried our Double Whammy 
                         Wings?
 
                                     BUTTERS
                          Hi. Is Lexus there, please? This is 
                         her boyfriend. 
 
                                     LEXUS
                         Thanks for calling Raisins. This is 
                         Lexus.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Hey Lexus.

                                     LEXUS
                         Hi, sweetie! Who's this?

                                     BUTTERS
                         Wuh it's me, Butters.

                                     LEXUS
                         Oh, okay. Hi, cutie.  Hey sweetie.  
                         So how are you, honey?
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         I'm fine. I miss you though.  Yeah, 
                         school was pretty tough today. We had 
                         two quizzes, and one of them was a pop 
                         quiz.  Sometimes I think our classes 
                         are too hard.  But I thought about you 
                         all day long. I promise. So how is your 
                         day going?
 
                                     LEXUS
                         Good, good.

                                     BUTTERS
                         Hey, hey sweetie, I was thinking tonight 
                         you could come over and we could watch 
                         The Exorcist on DVD.
 
                                     LEXUS
                         Oh, gee, I don't know, cutie.  Why don't 
                         you just come down to Raisins?
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Oh well, uh I kinda don't have any money 
                         left. Unh, I spent it all on Raisins 
                         the last six times.
 
                                     LEXUS
                          Awww, that's too bad, cutie. I really 
                         wanna see you.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Oh, I really wanna see you too, baby. 
                         Eh don't, don't worry. I'll get more 
                         money
 
                                     LEXUS
                          'K sugar. Gotta run.

                                     BUTTERS
                         Uh-okay. Uh, hey, Lexus, well, there's 
                         something I've been meaning to say. 
                          Here it goes: Lexus, I- Oh jeeze, maybe 
                         I shouldn't say it- no wait, I want 
                         to say it. I love you.  Heeheee, heh, 
                         Oh my God.
 
               [Butters' house, living room. Butters arrives there moments later 
               and faces the couch]
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Dad, I need an advance on my allowance 
                         again.
 
                                     STEPHEN
                         O-hoo no Butters! You got an advance 
                         two days ago. 
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Uh but I spent it all.

                                     LINDA
                         What are you spending all that money 
                         on, Butters?
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         On my girlfriend.

                                     STEPHEN
                          Girlfriend?

                                     LINDA
                         You... have a girlfriend, Butters?
 
                         
                                     BUTTERS
                          Yeah.

                                     CHRIS
                         And she's... a... girl, right?

                                     BUTTERS
                         Yup!

                                     CHRIS
                         Well all right! Good for you, Butters!
 
                         
                                     LINDA
                         Oh, that is so cute. When do we get 
                         to meet her?
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Well, I was hopin' to go see her right 
                         now. You can come alone.  But don't 
                         embarass me or nothin'.  I'm sure she'll 
                         be real nervous to impress you.
 
                                     STEPHEN
                         Don't worry, Butters. We just wanna 
                         say hi and then we'll leave you two 
                         alone.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Okay. 

                                     STEPHEN
                          You see? I told you he wouldn't turn 
                         out gay.
 
                                     LINDA
                          All right, you win.

               [Benny's, night. "We're always open." The Goth kids are seated 
               at a booth drinking coffee. A middle-aged waitress walks by with 
               a pot of coffee]
 
                                     GOTH 2
                         Hey, can we get more coffee over here?
 
                         
                                     WAITRESS
                         Damnit, are you kids just gonna sit 
                         here all night again and drink six dollars' 
                         work of coffee?! Why don't you get a 
                         life?! 
 
                                     GOTH 2
                          Conformist. Have fun in your rat-race 
                         life, living paycheck to paycheck for 
                         corporate gains.
 
                                     OTHER GOTHS
                         Yeah.

                                     GOTH 1
                          Dude, you haven't drank your coffee. 
                         
 
                                     STAN
                         Well I don't drink coffee.

                                     GOTH 1
                         You can't be a non-conformist if you 
                         don't drink coffee. 
 
                                     KYLE
                         Oh Jesus Christ, I had to see it to 
                         believe it! What the hell are you doing?!
 
                         
                                     STAN
                          Breathing deep in darkness that envelops 
                         my soul. 
 
                                     KYLE
                         God-damnit dude, your mom and dad want 
                         you to come home!
 
                                     STAN
                         So they can fill my head with more Disney 
                         lies about how perfect the world is? 
                         I don't think so.
 
                                     GOTH 1
                         Yeah. Why don't you just go back to 
                         your Justin Timberlake and your homework, 
                         you conformist asshole?  You just don't 
                         know what real pain is.
 
                                     KYLE
                         Oh, like you know what pain is! Go try 
                         living in a Third-World country, you 
                         little pussy!
 
                                     GOTH 1
                         I'm not gonna live in a Third-World 
                         country with all the conforminsts.
 
                         
                                     KYLE
                         Stan, this is it. Time to stop feeling 
                         sorry for yourself and come home! Everyone 
                         cares about you and everyone wants you 
                         back!
 
                                     STAN
                         What about Wendy? Isn't she still with 
                         Token?
 
                                     KYLE
                         Yeah. She is.

                                     STAN
                         Then people shouldn't care about me-ehhh. 
                         Because I don't care about them. What's 
                         the point of caring if all it brings 
                         is pain?
 
                                     HENRIETTA
                         For sure.

                                     KYLE
                          Fine. That's it. I give up. Have fun 
                         being miserable.
 
                                     STAN
                          ...conformist.

                                     OTHER GOTHS
                         Yeah.

               [Raisins, night. Butters and his parents arrive.]

                                     BUTTERS
                         Here we are, Mom and Dad! 

                                     MERCEDES
                         Hi, welcome to Raisins. Three of you?
 
                         
                                     BUTTERS
                         Hi, Mercedes. It's me, Lexus's boyfriend. 
                         I brought my parents over to meet her.
 
                         
                                     MERCEDES
                         Great.  Be sure to try our Cheddar Poppers. 
                         Right this way. 
 
                                     RAISINS GIRL
                         Who else wants a signed Raisins Girls 
                         calendar for five dollars? 
 
                                     DINERS
                         Woohoo, all right, yeah! 

                                     LINDA
                         Stephen, what is this place?

                                     STEPHEN
                         I, don't know.

                                     MERCEDES
                          Here you go. Porsche will by right 
                         with you. 
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Go ahead and have a seat, guys. Ah I've 
                         gotta go and find Lexus! 
 
                                     RAISINS GIRL
                          Hey cutie, you having a good time?
 
                         
                                     BOY
                         Yeah.

                                     STEPHEN
                         Oh boy, I think I know what's happened. 
                         Our son hasn't learned yet that girls 
                         will pretend to like him for money.
 
                         
                                     LINDA
                          This place is horrible. To objectify 
                         girls like this.
 
                                     PORSCHE
                          Hi guys. Can I take your order?

                                     LINDA
                         Little girl, you shouldn't be working 
                         here.
 
                                     PORSCHE
                         I shouldn't? Where I supposed to be 
                         working?
 
                                     LINDA
                         No, I mean you shouldn't work somewhere 
                         where you're paid for how you look. 
                         You should be learning a skill so you 
                         can grow up to be a businesswoman or 
                         even a doctor. Who knows? You could 
                         cure cancer.
 
                                     PORSCHE
                         I could cure cancer? Omigod! That would 
                         be sooo cool! I had a cancer sore on 
                         my lip once and it hurt sooo bad.
 
                         
                                     LINDA
                         ... Oh. Never mind, I think Raisins 
                         might be the perfect place for you.
 
                         
                                     PORSCHE
                         Cool! 

                                     BUTTERS
                         Mom? Dad? This is Lexus.

                                     LEXUS
                         Hi. Welcome to Raisins.

                                     STEPHEN
                         Uh, Butters, can we have a little talk 
                         with you? Outside?
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Huh? Oh anything you have to say to 
                         me  you can say in front of Lexus.
 
                         
                                     LINDA
                         Butters, these girls pretend to be interested 
                         in you because they know you'll give 
                         them tips.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Huh?

                                     STEPHEN
                         You see, Butters, women know that they 
                         can make men do anything by flirting. 
                         And some girls, like these, turn that 
                         into a profession.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Oh, I see.  You don't approve of my 
                         girlfriend!  Well let me tell you somethin', 
                         Mom and Dad, our love is as pure as 
                         a mountain spring! The odds may be stacked 
                         against us, but we're gonna give it 
                         our best shot! And so, if you can't 
                         be happy for us, y-you can just go to 
                         heck, Mom and Dad!  Come on, Lexus. 
                         I'm movin' out of my parents' house 
                         and I'm movin' in with you. Uh let's 
                         blow this joint!
 
                                     LEXUS
                         What are you talking about, kid? We 
                         are NOT boyfriend and girlfriend.
 
                         
                                     BUTTERS
                         ... What? Lexus, what are you saying? 
                         Are you saying... you don't want to 
                         be together anymore?
 
                                     LEXUS
                         I'm sorry, sweetie.

                                     BUTTERS
                         So that's it? We're broken up now?
 
                         
                                     LEXUS
                         I gotta get these curly fries to Table 
                         12. 
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Well go ahead and go. It's best we don't 
                         say anything more. There's nothing left 
                         to say. It's over.  Our relationship 
                         is o-over.
 
               [Run-down part of town, night. The conditions surrounding Stan's 
               presence there a week ago are present again, and Butters sobs 
               at the same spot Stan did, at the curb under a working street 
               light. Some shadows move in on him and stop when they cover most 
               of his head]
 
                                     GOTH VOICE
                         Look at this. Another tortured soul. 
                         Another life of pain.  Hey Raven, check 
                         it out. 
 
                                     STAN
                         Butters?

                                     BUTTERS
                         Oh  Uh hey, hey Stan.

                                     STAN
                         What's the matter with you?

                                     BUTTERS
                          Well, mu mu mu girlfriend broke up 
                         with me.
 
                                     HENRIETTA
                         Did she step on your heart with stiletto 
                         heels?
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Yeah.  It sure does hurt.

                                     GOTH 2
                         That's cool. I guess you can join up 
                         with us if you want.
 
                                     GOTH 1
                         Yeah. We're gonna go to the graveyard 
                         and write poems about death and how 
                         pointless life is.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Uh, uhm no thanks. I I love life.

                                     STAN
                         Huh? But you just got dumped

                                     BUTTERS
                         Wuh-ell yeah, and I'm sad, but at the 
                         same time I'm really happy that somethin' 
                         could make me feel that sad. It's like, 
                         ih ih, ih it makes me feel alive, you 
                         know? It makes me feel human. And the 
                         only way I could feel this sad now is 
                         if I felt somethin' really good before. 
                         So I have to take the bad with the good, 
                         so I guess what I'm feelin' is like 
                         a, beautiful sadness. I guess that sounds 
                         stupid...
 
                                     GOTH 1
                         Yeah.

                                     STAN
                         No. No, Butters, that doesn't sound 
                         stupid at all.
 
                                     BUTTERS
                         Well, thanks for offerin' to let me 
                         in your clique, guys, uh but, to be 
                         honest, I'd rather be a cryin' little 
                         pussy than a faggy Goth kid. Well see 
                         ya, Stan. 
 
                                     STAN
                         He's right. I don't even know who I 
                         am anymore. I like liking life a whole 
                         lot more than hating it. Screw you guys, 
                         I'm goin' home. 
 
                                     GOTH 2
                         Go ahead and go back to your sunshine 
                         fairytale!
 
               [South Park Elementary, playground. The school kids are back 
               at play. The same two teams face off, except that Bill has replaced 
               Token on Stan's team, and Stan hasn't arrived yet]
 
                                     KYLE
                          Okay, it's third down. And now, somebody 
                         make a play!
 
                                     STAN
                          Hey, can I join in? 

                                     KYLE
                         What happened? Aren't you still wallowing 
                         in pain?
 
                                     STAN
                         Yeah, it still hurts a lot, but ...I 
                         just realized that there's gonna be 
                         a lot of painful times in life, so, 
                         I'd better learn to deal with it the 
                         right way.  Hey Wendy!  You're a bitch. 
                         Token?  Right here, buddy. 
 
                                     KYLE
                         Well. Dude, it's uh it's good to have 
                         you back.
 
                                     STAN
                         Yeah. Let's play ball.

               THE END

Raisins



Writers :   Trey Parker
Genres :   Animation  Comedy


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