"SOUTH PARK"
Episode 607
"SIMPSONS ALREADY DID IT"
Written by
Trey Parker
[Kyle's house, day. Stan and Kyle are happily preparing a snowman,
which now has twigs, buttons, a hat and scarf. Tweek stands behind
Stan holding a carrot.]
STAN
Okay, now put on the nose, Tweek.
TWEEK
I can't. You do it.
KYLE
Just stick it on.
TWEEK
But what if I put it in the wrong place?
STAN
Just put it between his eyes.
TWEEK
GARH. But what if, while I'm putting
on the nose, the snowman comes to life
and tries to kill me?
STAN
Tweek, when has that ever happened,
except for that one time?
KYLE
Yeah.
BUTTERS
Hey, fellas.
STAN
Oh, hey Butters.
BUTTERS
How are things... oing with your new
best friend?
KYLE
Well, Tweek's okay, but he's certainly
no Kenny!
TWEEK
Arrrr!
BUTTERS
Yeah, but he's still better than you,
Butters.
KYLE
Yeah.
BUTTERS
Well ah, that's good. Good luck being
their new friend, Tweek. I hope you'll
do better than me. Well, see ya fellas.
TWEEK
Oh man, that is waaay too much pressure!
CARTMAN
You guys, you guys! You're not gonna
believe it!
STAN
Uh oh.
CARTMAN
Everything's gonna be okay, you guys!
Life isn't so crappy after all!
TWEEK
It's not?
CARTMAN
No! I was looking in this magazine,
and I found an ad for little ocean creatures
that you can buy and raise in your room!
KYLE
No way.
CARTMAN
Look! Sea people. You keep them under
a big tank of water and they like, build
castles and play basketball and stuff.
KYLE
Nuh uh.
CARTMAN
Yeah! And look! They ride around on
turtles and they play games with fish.
KYLE
No way.
CARTMAN
Okay, Kyle, you're being a Negative
Nancy. Stop it. Eh, unless you want
everyone to call you Negative Nancy
from now on. Now, what we need is to
all chip in four dollars, and we can
have them here tonorrow!
KYLE
Only sixteen dollars? They can't be
cool if they're only sixteen dollars.
If Nancy doesn't want to chip in, then
it will be $5.35 per person!
STAN
Alright, I'll chip in.
TWEEK
Gah! Me too.
KYLE
Naw, alright.
[Butters' house, day. He reaches his room.]
LINDA
Butters! Don't forget: dinner is in
two hours!
BUTTERS
Wokay, mom. Ah I'm just gonna be up
here, uh doin' my homework. Yes. By
day he is mild-mannered, sweet, and
innocent Butters BUT... nobody knows
that he actually has a dark underside...
Professor Chaos! Haha! Time to wreak
havoc on the world that shunned me!
DOUGIE
Professor Chaos!
BUTTERS
Ah, my faithful companion in world destruction,
General Disarray.
DOUGIE
I have done as you asked and brought
the first load of scrap wood.
BUTTERS
Excellent, General Disarray! Now we
can begin my most horrible evil plan
yet to wreak havoc on humanity.
DOUGIE
What dastardly deed are we doing now?
BUTTERS
Simple, my dear general. We are going
to block out the sun!
DOUGIE
Oh.
BUTTERS
Oh yes! I have plotted for weeks, and
figured that if we build a huge ...wooden
shade eighty feet high, a-and fifty
feet wide , precisely on this hill,
South Park ...will forever be cast in
a great shadow.
DOUGIE
Oh, awesome!
BUTTERS
Soon, all people will have to live like
moles! They will love only to remember
with sorrow how great the sun used to
be!
DOUGIE
Cool. It'll be just like on the Simpsons.
BUTTERS
Huh?
DOUGIE
They did that on the Simpsons. I think
it was the Mr. Burns character. He tried
to block Springfield from the sun.
BUTTERS
He did? Hawww, heck. I thought I was
bein' original.
DOUGIE
So how do we build it?
BUTTERS
Aww, I don't wanna do it now , not if
they already did it on the Simpsons.
I have to think of something else.
Uh Goddamnit, how come every time I
think of something clever, the Simpsons
already did it?
[Cartman's house, night. The living room light is on. Cartman
is sleeping, dreaming...]
CARTMAN
Sea people... coming in the mail tomorrow...
Yesss... Yeesss...
[The dream sequence]
CARTMAN
Look at me, livin' free
Free and clean amongst the Sea People
[the sea couple and he sail by in a tiny pirate ship. They take
him into the castle]
We look for pirates and search for gold.
Life is an adventure with the Sea People
[A sea man pitches to Cartman, who bats the ball for a run. As
a sea family looks on he blows out the candles on a cake.]
They don't ever conplain, they don't call me fat.
They don't make me do homework or nothin' like that.
[he rides a sea horse alongside sea people on horseback and grins
at the camera]
This is the way life was meant to be. Laughin' and singing,
[Shown walking with the sea couple again.]
Sea people and me.
Sea people and me, you guys.
[The dream ends and the bubbles fade away. Cartman wakes up,
smiling]
CARTMAN
Woowww. Only three more hours, sea people.
Only three hours and you can take me
away from this crappy goddamned planet
full of hippies.
[Cartman's house, day. He's at his desk with the new kit while
Stan, Kyle, and Tweek stand behind him. His dressed as a monarch,
in suit, crown and cape.]
CARTMAN
Okay. I've added the water purifier
tablet to the Sea People Kingdom tank.
Now it says "Step 2. Add the Sea People
eggs to the water; you will see sea
life spring instantly." Okay, let's
just run through this one more time:
when the sea people arrive I will welcome
them to South Park as Ambassador of
Earth. Tweek, you give them the key
to the city, and we'll all engage them
in simple conversation. We've gotta
make sea people feel comfortable, okay?
Ready?
STAN
Ready. Let's see 'em.
CARTMAN
Hold the sign up, Kyle! Higher, Kyle!
Okay. Here we go.
STAN
Are they playing basketball?
CARTMAN
What the fuck is this?!
STAN
Hey, these are brine shrimp. I used
to feed them to my fish.
CARTMAN
I got RIPPED OFF!
KYLE
I told you, Cartman.
CARTMAN
Oh, shut up, Kyle!!! Shut your Goddamned
Jew mouth!!! You people are why there's
war in the Middle East!!! And you,
Tweek!! Why don't you learn to button
your shirt right, for once?! You're
as bad as Stan with his stupid girlfriend,
always spending time with her!! God,
I hate you guys!! They were supposed
to take me away to their underwater
kingdom. They were supposed to take
me on adventures of the deep
TWEEK
They package brine shrimp and sell
them to kids? That's not right, man!
STAN
What are we gonna do with them?
CARTMAN
Who cares?! Throw 'em away!!
KYLE
Hey! Let's pour them in the teacher's
coffee tomorrow morning.
STAN
Yeah, that'd be funny.
CARTMAN
Heheh, okay, okay.
[next day, Ms. Choksondik's house. The scene from last episode
is carried on here, only zoomed out. The paramedics take Ms Choksondik's
corpse into the ambulance as a crowd looks on. The adults murmur
amongst themselves. The ambulance pulls away and Cartman pulls
the other boys in with some urgency.]
CARTMAN
Alright, listen to me! We must take
a strict vow of silence!
TWEEK
Jesus Christ, we killed her!
CARTMAN
Shh! Tweek, shut the hell up!
[Dougie's house. He's doing homework on the living room coffee
table when a doorbell rings. He goes to answer it. He opens the
door and Butters steps in with something under wraps]
BUTTERS
General Disarray, are your parents home?
DOUGIE
No.
BUTTERS
Ah, I've done it, General Disarray.
I've completed my most horrible deed
to date.
DOUGIE
What?
BUTTERS
You know that big statue in the town
square of pioneer John Wesley Powell?
I snuck over there with a hacksaw and
uh, and I cut off his head! Hahahahaa,
yeah!
DOUGIE
Oh, uh...
BUTTERS
Hahaha, and they're probably just realizing
that now! Quick! We must turn on the
news!
NEWS ANCHOR
... but Hillary Clinton's ass just keeps
getting bigger. Also in the news tonight,
a vandal has apparently cut off and
stolen the head of the Powell statue
in the South Park Town Square.
BUTTERS
Look! Look! I've made the news! I-I've
wreaked havoc!
NEWS ANCHOR
The head was taken in the early morning
hours and the police have no leads.
BUTTERS
I finally made the world sorry! I've
brought sadness, a-and chaos!
NEWS ANCHOR
This act, of course, reminded us all
of the time that Bart Simpson took
the head of the Springfield statue in
one of their classic episodes. Here's
what some people had to say:
MAN 1
Well, I, I think whoever took the head
was... really just doing an homage to
the Simpsons. Heh, I think it's great.
WOMAN
Yes, it really made me reflect on that
episode and laugh.
MAN 2
Well the Simpsons is such a great show,
and we need reminders like this to keep
us watching.
BUTTERS
Oh. Uh-m, son of a bitch.
NEWS ANCHOR
The police say that instead of looking
for the missing head, they'd rather
leave it off and be reminded of the
Simpsons every day.
BUTTERS
Well why didn't you tell me the Simpsons
already did that?
DOUGIE
You seemed so proud, I didn't wanna
bum you out.
BUTTERS
Stupid Simpsons...
[Kyle's house, night. The boys watch TV on the sofa]
TERRANCE
Hello there, Phillip. I brought you
something
PHILLIP
Oh, what is it?
KYLE
See? We're just watching cartoons, like
always. Nothing's changed.
TWEEK
Jesus Christ, she's dead!!
STAN
Stop it, Tweek! We're pretending like
nothing happened.
TERRANCE
Phillip, I think I may have accidentally
killed Celine Dion.
PHILLIP
Killing is never an accident, you dickface!
STAN
Oh jeez, change the channel.
NEWS ANCHOR
And in other news, still no known cause
of death found for elementary school
teacher Diane Choksondik. However, doctors
say that during the autopsy they did
find semen in her stomach.
STAN
They found the sea men! It's only a
matter of tiime before they find the
women, too!
NEWS ANCHOR
The autopsy is ongoing and cause of
death is yet to be determined.
KYLE
Oh God!
STAN
We're dead!
TWEEK
Oh Jesus! That's it, man! I want nothing
more to do with you guys!
CARTMAN
Tweek! Where are you going?
TWEEK
They're gonna find you out! Then when
they do I don't wanna be within fifty
feet of you! You're gonna fry, man!
STAN
Hey, Tweek, you're in this just as much
as we are!
TWEEK
What?! I told you NOT to put the sea
people in her coffee! I wasn't even
there when you did it!
KYLE
Yeah, but you're our new friend and
that makes you cul.. p-piable!
CARTMAN
In fact, that makes you the most responsible.
Tweek, you might have to take the fall
on this one.
TWEEK
Rrrr-hr-hrrr!!!
[Chef's house, night. The boys arrive at his house and ring the
bell. He opens the door and sees them]
CHEF
Oh, welll, hello there, children.
STAN
Chef, we did something kind of bad.
KYLE
We don't know who else to talk to.
CHEF
Ohh, I'm sure your little cracker problems
ain't all that bad. Come on in. Now,
just sit down and take a deep breath
and tell ol' Chef what's goin' on.
STAN
We need you to promise not to tell
anybody.
CHEF
Nowww, children, every problem can be
worked out. What was it?
STAN
We... killed our teacher and they found
our seamen in her stomach
CHEF
...Oh, children, that's a problem we
all have to face at one time or another.
Here: let me sing you a little song
that might cheer you up. Sometimes you
kill your teacher and they find your
semen in her stomach, and uh Wait! What
the what?!
STAN
So what should we do?
KYLE
Wow, I guess this really is a big deal.
CARTMAN
We've only got one option, you guys.
We're gonna have to go to that hospital
where they're doing the autopsy and
get our seamen back ourselves.
TWEEK
Gnaaahahahah! I pulled out my hair!
[Dugie's house, night. In the living room Butters begins to pitch
ideas.]
BUTTERS
Wokay, how about this, Dougie? I-I'm
going' to pose as a real-estate agent
and con everyone in town into buyin'
a monorail. And then skip town with
all their money. No?
DOUGIE
...Simpsons did it. The did it in episode
204.
BUTTERS
Wokay , then I'm goin' to start a Web
site to spread vicious ru-rumrs about
everyone in town! And and then I'll
take their-
DOUGIE
Simpsons did it!
BUTTERS
I'll bury a skeleton wearing angel
wings so that the townspeople will think
a fallen angel has fallen-
DOUGIE
Simpsons did it!
[Hell's Pass Hospital, night. Cartman leads the other boys into
the coroner's office]
STAN
This is it.
CARTMAN
Alright, everyone scatter and look for
the seamen. Tweek, stay by the door
and keep a look out. If you see anybody
coming, say the code word: Hammertime.
TWEEK
Hammertime? Can't the code word just
be... "lookout"? I won't remember "Hammertime"!
CARTMAN
Ugh. Just remember the song "Can't
Touch This" and you'll remember the
code word!
STAN
Yeah, stupid.
TWEEK
Oh, God.
KYLE
There's nothing here!
STAN
Dude, it's probably in her stomach.
CARTMAN
Is it her?
KYLE
Yeah, it's Ms. Choksondik alright.
STAN
What do we do now?
CARTMAN
Just reach in there and get the seamen
out of her stomach! Oh, God! You guys
are such pussies! Hemmm...
TWEEK
Erm! Hff. You gu-guys! Ha... Hamme-
I can't remember uh-the code word!
STAN
Do you see the sea people.
CARTMAN
No, just a bunch of goo.
TWEEK
You guys! Um, dum dumdumdum, dumdum,
dumdum. Can't touch this. Dum dumdumdum,
dumdum, dumdum. Can't touch this.
KYLE
Ms. Choksondik stinks inside.
STAN
Yeah.
TWEEK
...dumdum, dumdum. Can't touch this.
Dum dumdumdum, dumdum, then stop. HAMMERTIME!
STAN
Aaah!
KYLE
Quick. Hide.
VOICE
Yeah, well, at least we got Shannon
Sharp back.
DOCTOR 1
Alright, let's just leave the semen
sample next to the corpse; I wanna run
a hair fiber test next.
DOCTOR 2
Hey, do you smell children?
DOCTOR 1
No, that's not...
KYLE
Got it!
STAN
Let's go!
[Butters house, later that night. Butters presents plan #127-C]
BUTTERS
Bring the World Cup to South Park so
the... a huge soccer riot can destroy
the-
DOUGIE
Simpsons did it! Simpsons did it!
BUTTERS
Take all the beer cans in South Park
and have them shaken up in a huge mixer
at the paint store so that-
DOUGIE
Episode 9F17 entitled "So It's Come
To This!"
BUTTERS
Fine! Then maybe I'll just forget about
destroying the town and just run away
and join the circus!
DOUGIE
...Simpsons did it.
BUTTERS
Dwaah!!
[Cartman's house, later. In his room he takes the semen sample
and pours it into his tank, tapping the rim of the tank so the
semen can start moving. The semen slides into the tank and puts
the lid back on]
CARTMAN
There. We just put the sea people back
in the tank with the others, and nobody
will ever know. The blood is washed
neatly from our hands.
CHEF
Alright, children, I got you four tickets
to Thailand and three hundred dollars
cash . It's gonna be tough living for
a while. You might have to do things
for money you never thought of doin'
before.
CARTMAN
It's alright, Chef! We got our sea
people out of the teacher's stomach.and
we put them back in their aquarium!
CHEF
...Wait, what? Sea people?
STAN
The sea people that we put in the teacher's
coffee.
CHEF
Uhh, maybe you'd better start from the
beginning.
[Forty-three seconds later...]
STAN
...and then we put them back in the
tank.
CHEF
Oohhh, children, you misunderstood.
Sea people is different from se-men.
KYLE
It is?
CHEF
Yes! That stuff that was in that vial
didn't come from you, it came from someone
else. I thought you children took turns
rapin' and then murdered the teacher.
CARTMAN
Well if they found somebody else's sea
men in her stomach, maybe they'll find
our sea people, too.
CHEF
Relax, children, junk that's in brine
can't kill you. Your teacher must have
died from something else.
KYLE
Oh, really??
TWEEK
Egh! I'm so relieved. Gaah-ah-ah!
CHEF
Alright. You children have had a long
night. Why don't we all get some rest
and on Monday, I'll sing you a song
explainin' the difference between semen
and sea people. Come on, children.
I'll walk you all home.
STAN
Okay. Goodnight, Cartman.
CARTMAN
G'night, guys.
KYLE
I'm so glad we're not murderers.
CARTMAN
Ah, so great that everything is finally
back to normal.
[South Park, next day. Stan, Kyle, and Tweek stand at the bus
station waiting for the bus.]
CARTMAN
H'you guys! Come quick! You won't
believe it!
STAN
Oh no, what now?
[Cartman's house, later. He leads them to his room, to the tank]
CARTMAN
Those sea men from the teacher's stomach
somehow combined with the remaining
sea people we had left in the tank and,
ah, well LOOK!
KYLE
Whoa.
STAN
Wow. How did that happen?
CARTMAN
I've been up for hours doing some calculations,
and I've come up with my final theory
of composite dynamics. Sea people plus
sea men equals sea ciety.
KYLE
Whoa.
STAN
They've already accomplished so much.
TWEEK
They're like, bacteria. Small organisms
live much faster lives and do things
at a much faster rate.
CARTMAN
That's right, Tweek. And if my theory
is correct, all we need to get is more
of the two reacting agents, and we can
really see them flourish. Tweek!
TWEEK
Hr!
CARTMAN
You go and send away for mre sea people
from the magazine ad! Get at least five
gallons of them here stat! Stan and
Kyle, you go find a bigger fish tank
to them all in.
KYLE
Well what are you gonna do?
CARTMAN
Me? I'm gonna go out on the town and
find ten gallons of sea men.
[Dougie's room, day. Butters and Dougie are in costume. Between
them is a contraption under a white sheet]
BUTTERS
I've done it, General Disarray. I've
watches all one hundred and thirty-two
episodes of the Simpsons, twice. And
I've finally come up with something...
tha they have never done! Uh, behold!
This device that I have made will take
the cherries out of chocolate-covered
cherries and replace the inside instead,
with two-month-old mayonnaise. People
will think that they are gonna get a
bite of a sweet, delicious cherry, but,
instead, they'll get a mouth full of
yuckies, and sticky mayonnaise. Hey!
You've never ...seen this on the Simpsons,
right?
DOUGIE
No, I think the Simpsons would be more
clever than that.
BUTTERS
Good! Then l-let us take my machine
outside and make society finally pay
for sh-shunning us!
ANNOUNCER
Tonight on the Simpsons: It's a laughorama
when Bart builds a machine that takes
cherries out of chocolate-covered cherries
and replace them instead, with mayonnaise.
BUTTERS
Nnno , uh no, no, it can't be.
DOUGIE
Uh oh, Simpsons did it! Simpsons did
it!
BUTTERS
No! No!
DOUGIE
Simpsons did it! Simpsons did it!
BUTTERS
Aaaaah!
DOUGIE
Don't have a cow, man.
BUTTERS
Oh sweet Jesus!
[Sperm Bank of South Park, day. Cartman hums as he approaches
the door. He enters and walks down the hall. The tellers follow
him with their eyes.]
WOMAN
Can I help you?
CARTMAN
Yes, my mommy told me this is where
I could find some sea men?
WOMAN
Your... mom told you?
CARTMAN
Do you have them or not?
WOMAN
We... sell semen, yes, but not normally
to children.
CARTMAN
What's your name?
WOMAN
Frances Velman
CARTMAN
Frances, let's talk. I don't want a
bunch of bullcrap from you and you don't
a bunch of bullcrap from me, right?
Where does that get us? Nowhere. The
truth is, I'm completely certified to
handle sea men, and though I may appear
young, I'm one of the leading sea men
authorities of the Midwest. Up and comer,
you know what I'm saying? I'll have
my own business soon and I'll need people
to run it. I'm talkin' about you, Frances.
And I'm talkin' about a six-figure income.
How does that sound?
WOMAN
Everything we supply here is by a quarter-ounce.
One donor, certified, on record.
CARTMAN
I see, very interesting.
FRANCES
What are you doing?
CARTMAN
Takin' a look here. Seems like quality
stuff you got here, Frances. Yeah, good
texture, nice consistency. Sea men must
be alive and healthy in there. I'll
take five.
FRANCES
Five? Vials?
CARTMAN
No, gallons.
FRANCES
Www-we don't have that much here.
CARTMAN
Damint! Give me all you've got, then!
[South Park, in town. Butters runs from Dougie, who chases after
him]
BUTTERS
Aaah! Ah, Ah, Aaah! Nooo! Nooo!
DOUGIE
Simpsons did it!! Simpsons did it!!
BUTTERS
Waaaah! Hay! Uh let me on! Let me on!
MS. CRABTREE
SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP!!!
BUTTERS
Haaah!
MR. GARRISON
Butters, have you seen Mr. Hat?
CHEF
Hello there, children!
BUTTERS
Aaah! Nooo!
MR. GARRISON
...What the hell's wrong with him?
[Cartman's room, later. Stan looks at the aquarium and sees the
civilization has developed further. Pyramids now appear. The
sound of running water is in the background. Cut to Kyle filling
a larger tank with a water hose.]
STAN
Look, the sea people have evolved to
an Egyptian-like culture.
TWEEK
Soon they'll discover frozen food. Goh-ho.
CARTMAN
That should be enough water, Kyle.
You got the new sea-people packets,
Tweek?
TWEEK
Uh-uh huh.
STAN
Well, drop them in!
CARTMAN
And I've got the sea men.
KYLE
Wow. That's a lot of sea men you've
got there, Cartman.
CARTMAN
Yeah, I bought all that I could at this
bank, and then I got the rest from this
guy Ralph in an alley.
STAN
That's cool.
CARTMAN
Yeah, and the sweet thing is, this stupid
asshole didn't even charge me money
for it. He just made me close my eyes
and suck it out of a hose. Heh. There
we go.
STAN
Okay, now let's put the sea ciety in
its new home.
CARTMAN
Nothin' to do now but wait.
STAN
...Close your eyes and suck it out of
a hose?
CARTMAN
Uh-huh, suck it out of a hose, yeah.
STAN
Hm.
KYLE
Huh.
[Cartman's house, next day. He's asleep, but begins to stir.
His eyes open and he grins at what he sees. He hops off the bed
and rushes to the tank. He looks here and there and finds a more
advanced civilization in the tank.]
CARTMAN
Oh my God! The tiny underwater civilization
has advanced hundreds of years. Look!
There's a library! A-and a temple! And
a- woh-? Oh. They think I'm God. Yes!!!
I am god of the sea people!!! You hear
that?! I am god of the sea people!!!
I am master of their great sunken empire!!!
Mo-o-om! I'm god of the sea people!
LIANE
That's nice, poopie.
[Butters' house, day. He's sitting in the living room, which
now takes the appearance of the Simpson living room]
NEWS ANCHOR
And in other South Park News, elementay
school teacher Ms. Choksondik's autopsy
has shown that the semen in her stomach
belongs to school counselor, Mr. Mackey.
However, the semen apparently did NOT
contribute to the death, and so Mr.
Mackey's identity is to remain anonymous.
STAN, KYLE
Hey Butters.
BUTTERS
Haaa!
STAN
Hey, what are you doing, man? Cartman
says he has something really cool to
show everybody. You've gotta come.
BUTTERS
Cartman?
CARTMAN
Ha ha!
[Cartman's house, whick now looks like a typical Springfield
house, day. In Cartman's room, everyone but Butters is shown
Simpsons-style. Present are Chef, Mr. Garrison, Liane, Tweek,
Timmy, Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Dougie, and Butters. Cartman displays
his new sea ciety]
CARTMAN
Behold! You all see my tiny minions
groveling at my likeness! I am Eric
Cartman, god.
KYLE
Hey. We paid for the sea people too.
How come they're not making statues
of us?
CARTMAN
Be you not jealous, Jew. I am creator
of all things, yea.
MR. GARRISON
That is very impressive, Eric. What
do you intend to do with your underwater
society?
CARTMAN
I'm gonna send a message to my people
and tell 'em to develop a great machine
that will shrink me down to their size,
so I can live amongst them forever.
BUTTERS
Aha! Ahaha! Ahahahaha!
CARTMAN
What the hell is wrong with you, Butters?
BUTTERS
They did that on the Simpsons! Ha! Treehouse
of Horror! Episode 4F02! The Genesis
tub. Lisa loses a tooth, and the bacteria
on it start to grow, and makes a little
society, and they build a statue of
her thinking she's God! Ha! Hahaha!
CARTMAN
...So?
KYLE
...Yeah. So?
CARTMAN
Dude, the Simpsons have done everything
already. Who cares?
STAN
Yeah, and they've been on the air for
like, thirteen years. Of course they've
done everything.
MR .GARRISON
Every idea's been done, Butters, even
before the Simpsons.
CHEF
Yeah. In fact, that episode was a rip-off
of a Twilight Zone episode.
BUTTERS
Really? So I shouldn't care if I come
up with an idea, and the Simpsons already
did it. It... uh...doesn't... matter.
Everything is back to normal, a, I
think... I think I can go back to tryin'
to destroy the world again.
CHEF
Good for you!
CARTMAN
Yeah, that's great Butters. Now get
the hell out of my room.
BUTTERS
I feel like a spring chicken. I'm ready
to wreak havoc once again!
STAN
Hey, look everybody! The other side
of the aquarium is building another
statue!
KYLE
Hey! It's Tweek.
TWEEK
Me?? Aw, man! I don't wanna be a god.
That is waaay too much pressure.
CARTMAN
That is bullcrap! You'd better stop
worshiping him, sea people!
MR. GARRISON
What's going on now?
KYLE
The sea people from Cartman's side are
suicide-bombing the buildings on Tweek's
side.
TWEEK
Gaaa-hah!
CARTMAN
Yeah! Go!
TWEEK
NOW what's happening?
STAN
The sea people on Tweek's side just
suicide-bombed the Cartman statue.
CARTMAN
Oh God-damnit!
CARTMAN
Oh no! Oh the humanity!
MR. GARRISON
Well it was a nice project while it
lasted, boys.
KYLE
Yep. But I guess this proves that war
is the natural order of life.
CARTMAN
Why can't societies just live in peace?
THE END
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